Girls initiating

Of course.

An insecure guy simply means that he will work harder to stay in the relationship.
An insecure girl however just gives up trying.

Also why don't you approach guys? You claim you could, but if you never have then how do you know?

Ok if your dropping hints and he still doesn't ask then he's probably a poosy to be honest.

Exactly. That's what I meant when I said I don't ask guys out. Because if I drop enough hints and he still doesn't then he either doesn't like me (which is cool by me ) or he can't muster up the courage. Neither situations work for me.

Incidentally, I actually have social anxiety and if I can muster up the courage to do that, then a guy should be able to do that.

I used to have that up until Year 9, and it sort of just tapered off and disappeared after that. But yeah, if I ever put myself out there and got nothing back it would frustrate me to no end, lol.

On TSR, guys will say they'd love girls to initiate (because they are too shy to do it themselves). Some would love it happening (as it might be their only chance of a date if they never approach themselves), but for a lot of men it will come off as desperate, even on a subconscious level. Confidence is the MOST important attribute to attract women, and if a man doesn't learn to approach and initiate contact with women, he'll never develop the confidence he needs.

IRL, most girls will continue to let guys initiate and they do so wisely. I personally would never walk up to a guy in a bar or ask for a phone number. I follow this: http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2011/09/dont-initiate-contact.html (Which is written by a guy btw. He is probably comfortable stating it outright because he doesn't have problems approaching women).

Yeah I actually really sympathise with guys who find it difficult to find the courage to ask a girl out. However I think if they get over that hump, then they feel almost endorsed as a man and they come to dating with more confidence. I mean I've had to get over not being able to initiate conversation with men and learning how to flirt and look more appealing which is just as hard but in a different way to what men experience. It's hard when you get rejected, but with the right perspective it can actually be seen in a more positive light I think. When I was more insecure and found it harder to initiate conversation, I'd attract guys who were just like me. Now I'm more confident, I want to get to know guys at least on the same level. I don't think it'd be very dignifying for a guy to be with a woman who's almost like a mother figure anyway...

On many websites it seems to state that males should always do any initiating (e.g. showing interest/asking out on first dates/getting in contact), and that women who initiate may put off men by being forward or whatever.

However, in real life most of my male friends say they would actually wish girls took the first step more often. Is this actually true (are there instances where girls taking the first step has helped/made a man more interested in her), or just said because they want to make less effort, but actually if it happened, you would probably not like the girl?

On many websites it seems to state that males should always do any initiating (e.g. showing interest/asking out on first dates/getting in contact), and that women who initiate may put off men by being forward or whatever.

However, in real life most of my male friends say they would actually wish girls took the first step more often. Is this actually true (are there instances where girls taking the first step has helped/made a man more interested in her), or just said because they want to make less effort, but actually if it happened, you would probably not like the girl?

You do realise girls could just click "View poll results", and instead by voting, they have changed the poll results due to 30% of participants being girls and voting for that option, which changes the percentages for the other 3 options.

On TSR, guys will say they'd love girls to initiate (because they are too shy to do it themselves). Some would love it happening (as it might be their only chance of a date if they never approach themselves), but for a lot of men it will come off as desperate, even on a subconscious level. Confidence is the MOST important attribute to attract women, and if a man doesn't learn to approach and initiate contact with women, he'll never develop the confidence he needs.

IRL, most girls will continue to let guys initiate and they do so wisely. I personally would never walk up to a guy in a bar or ask for a phone number. I follow this: http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2011/09/dont-initiate-contact.html (Which is written by a guy btw. He is probably comfortable stating it outright because he doesn't have problems approaching women).

I get what you guys are saying. But why should I ask a guy out? Sorry, but that's not my responsibility. If I liked a guy enough, I would. But I also wouldn't be interested in a guy who wouldn't ask me out.

Men do like initiating but only if they are interested in the woman. I'm not prepared to put my dignity out for the wolves.

I mean telling women to initiate is like telling women not to wear make-up 'cause guys say they like it. Yet if a women were to do that, she'd get less attention. Likewise men say they like it when a woman initiates but it actually happened it wouldn't affect their level of interest. If it makes no difference and doesn't put them off or make them more interested, then why do that? Why make that extra effort for a man? I've got better things to do with my spare time then go around chasing after some guy's affections. Who's to say he's anything special?

OK, I was out with my GF and her friends at a club in London, I was dressed quite smart as it was her friend's bday. So my GF and her friends were drunkenly talking at the table and I was kind of awkwardly standing close holding my GF's coat, not knowing what to do. So a girl came up to me, tapped me on the shoulder and asked... "My friend over there wanted to know if you're gay"... I laughed and was like "no, why do I look gay", getting all self conscious. She said Oh right, Ok are you single? I said "no, that's my GF there", Then she said "So you're not gay and you've got a GF" I said yes. She basically asked if I was gay like 3 times whilst also asking if I was single.. I got really confused and self conscious and kept saying "no, that's my GF". So then she hugged me really tight and gave me a long kiss on the cheek.

Looking back I should've been able to work out what was going on but I later told my GF what happened cos I was really self conscious that I looked gay. She explained that actually I was being chatted up (I didn't tell her about the kiss & hug cos she would've got pissed).

omg cant believe im the first person to vote for :
I’m a guy, and I think it would make me less interested in a girl if she initiated

Girls initiating is BORING !!!!! takes the fun out of things