Is so much easier for a man to have an attractive body..
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Original post by civilstudent
Ok so many women care about height/bone structure but so do men when it comes to women..wide hips, long legs and all that. Obviously people like different things too but it was my own perspective that made me start the thead, or maybe a bit of resentment lol. In the gym I saw a man chatting up a women basically staring at her chest and she didnt have a particularly 'good/toned body'. At the time I thought meh I can work out all day but my body wont be classed as being as good as someone with a chest like that. Then I thought its ok for guys they can just build muscle or 'get ripped' and they will have a great body..as I thought thats what generally women liked. At least thats what I like, but maybe Im over generalising.
So yea depending on the importance men place on breasts (which according to you is not much) I just saw it as very hard for some women to obtain a body they just don't have. Obviously with wanting to be toned/fit I didn't even think of and would never consider gaining weight to increase breast size. To be fair its not that simple anyway I don't know about others but any extra weight goes straight to my thighs/hips.
I guess from the replies I can see the bigger picture now though so yea I suppose its not really harder for women to get a better body (unless you include decent breasts lol).
No sarcasm, though there must be a reason you suspect it its not just the smiley!
So yea depending on the importance men place on breasts (which according to you is not much) I just saw it as very hard for some women to obtain a body they just don't have. Obviously with wanting to be toned/fit I didn't even think of and would never consider gaining weight to increase breast size. To be fair its not that simple anyway I don't know about others but any extra weight goes straight to my thighs/hips.
I guess from the replies I can see the bigger picture now though so yea I suppose its not really harder for women to get a better body (unless you include decent breasts lol).
No sarcasm, though there must be a reason you suspect it its not just the smiley!
I think another factor is men are men are more likely to be shallow at looks, women about job/social status. So if a guy wants to be attractive, he's got to fit the gym (which will still be a big time commitment) around having a high powered career.
Saying that I know a lot of out of shape, rich blokes with stunning wives so maybe they can just focus on the career part.
Original post by Bassetts
Fair enough. I've never liked playing team sports. Too many dick-heads in them and when you perform well, the team gets credit and not you. Another member of the team can let you down and you can't do anything about it.
I prefer solo sports. I hate working in a team with the inevitable dick-heads you have to work with. If I perform badly, it's my own fault. If I do well, all the credit and attention is given to me.
I prefer solo sports. I hate working in a team with the inevitable dick-heads you have to work with. If I perform badly, it's my own fault. If I do well, all the credit and attention is given to me.
Gymnatstics and swimming are mainly solo sports. I swim and it couldn't really be more solo, as you can't even hear people whilst training. Because of how I swim my races I preferred relays but it can be frustrating if people aren't pulling the times their individual times suggested they would, though times does mean you're a lot more accountable than in say football. It also helped me with gym stuff, as I've been used to eating 5/6000 cals a day since I was 15ish.
Rowing's mainly team, but sculling is still an Olympic event and plenty do it.
(edited 10 years ago)
males are willing to look past breast and ass size
women however are not willing to look past height
who has it harder i wonder
women however are not willing to look past height
who has it harder i wonder
Original post by civilstudent
How come people say that men have it harder/more is expected when it comes to having a nice body? Any man can have an attractive body by working out/weights and all that. However as a female I train regular but apparantly even though Im toned/strong can never have a superb body because Im flat chested (well size AA). Men don't tend to look at a womans muscles and be attracted its usually the breasts/bum they care about and things that are hard to/impossible to improve. With guys its about muscles which can certainly be improved.
btw Im not sexist or anything like that im just trying to see things as they are and am questioning it. We know that woman have makeup to hide behind and Im not disputing that asI agree but Im asking about the body..
what do you think guys/girls? Opinions?
btw Im not sexist or anything like that im just trying to see things as they are and am questioning it. We know that woman have makeup to hide behind and Im not disputing that asI agree but Im asking about the body..
what do you think guys/girls? Opinions?
Can't help you on the chest front, but your bum is absolutely not something it's impossible to change with exercise. Do some squats (with weights).
Original post by Table dust
males are willing to look past breast and ass size
women however are not willing to look past height
who has it harder i wonder
women however are not willing to look past height
who has it harder i wonder
Original post by Katie_p
The last line's my opinion, so it may well not be correct. But as you said yourself both sexes find it attractive, probably a lot more people think women are naturally most attractive than think males are....Not looking for a fight, just pointing out that if more people find something good to look at, it's probably more attractive.
my previous post explains why this is the case.
this is quite funny... all the guys and girls thinking its the other half..
So.. as someone who, dispite any of your problems with how I am, has lived socially as both a guy and a girl.. and dated as both a traditional male, and female, I would say this:
Which one is harder? hmm, its hard.. they both have very distinct differences..
Both have some things that you cannot change:
guys
Height, penis size, facial shape/structure, etc.
Girls
Chest, body-shape (yeah, its not as easy as skinny/fat) facial shape/structure etc.
Both have things that you can change and work on:
guys
Weight, muscles, looking good, wearing the 'right' clothes etc.
girls
weight, makeup, style, hair, clothes..
I would say a lot of the differences in terms of dificulties can lie in the expectations of either sex..
guys work out, and make themselves look better for girls, and for themselves.. but rarely ever, for other guys (friends)
Girls put effort in, for themselves, for boys/partners, but also for other girls, and their friends..
So in that regard, there is an extra layer of pressure..
- another aspect to consider is the media..
Whilst it is true that there is a growing increase in importance of how guys look, its no where near the level of scrutiny women are put under.. everything from the daily-mails collums of shame, to all manner of articles, and female celebrities loosing thier jobs, due to age and apperance, just piles on the pressure..
It is getting better, but its still novel to think of a fat female celebrity.. its a fairly recent thing.. and still considered empowering for women to have these role-models.. whereas for guys in the media, there is a much much larger vairance in body-shape, size, age, looks, etc.
In terms of effort to look better, both have it hard.. but in different ways:
Guys, in general, would tend to require more effort and commitment to gaining this desired muscle.. requiring many hours of hard work and such..
Whereas for girls, less effort may be required in terms of toning/working out to look good.. for them to dress in a way which society as a whole, deems 'good' requires more effort.. hair, makeup, clothes, aperance, grooming, shaving, hair removal, etc.. all takes far far longer then for guys..
So whereas a guy may need to go to the gym, and work harder for longer... he can then spend relitivly little time before going out, and look good.. - for girls it can be the oposite, less time in the gym, but more time on the other aspects of 'looking good'
- in terms of self perception, girls have it a lot worse..
Statistics dont lie on this. more girls have body issues, and more girls harm and kill themselves each year due to body issues, and body-size related bullying. - whether the causes come from guys, girls, the media, themseleves, etc.. its not really up for debate that girls can be much more harsh on themselves, then guys can... (including the old steryotype of the guy who is ugly, but looks in the mirror and goes 'not bad.. looking fine today')
Overal.. I would say:
Both require equal effort to look good, but the effort is spent on different parts of the process.
Girls still get given a harder time by the media, about their looks (though it is becoming more equal by the year)
Both are judged on their looks, but by different groups, and by different criteria.
Girls have a far harder time, personally, with accepting and dealing with how they look (on average)
Both have a number of things that cannot be changed, and a number which can.. but they are sligtly different between the sexes
[*disclaimer - huge huge huge huge generalisations.. but hey, what do you expect when trying to talk about 'girls' and 'guys' as single identities...]
So.. as someone who, dispite any of your problems with how I am, has lived socially as both a guy and a girl.. and dated as both a traditional male, and female, I would say this:
Which one is harder? hmm, its hard.. they both have very distinct differences..
Both have some things that you cannot change:
guys
Height, penis size, facial shape/structure, etc.
Girls
Chest, body-shape (yeah, its not as easy as skinny/fat) facial shape/structure etc.
Both have things that you can change and work on:
guys
Weight, muscles, looking good, wearing the 'right' clothes etc.
girls
weight, makeup, style, hair, clothes..
I would say a lot of the differences in terms of dificulties can lie in the expectations of either sex..
guys work out, and make themselves look better for girls, and for themselves.. but rarely ever, for other guys (friends)
Girls put effort in, for themselves, for boys/partners, but also for other girls, and their friends..
So in that regard, there is an extra layer of pressure..
- another aspect to consider is the media..
Whilst it is true that there is a growing increase in importance of how guys look, its no where near the level of scrutiny women are put under.. everything from the daily-mails collums of shame, to all manner of articles, and female celebrities loosing thier jobs, due to age and apperance, just piles on the pressure..
It is getting better, but its still novel to think of a fat female celebrity.. its a fairly recent thing.. and still considered empowering for women to have these role-models.. whereas for guys in the media, there is a much much larger vairance in body-shape, size, age, looks, etc.
In terms of effort to look better, both have it hard.. but in different ways:
Guys, in general, would tend to require more effort and commitment to gaining this desired muscle.. requiring many hours of hard work and such..
Whereas for girls, less effort may be required in terms of toning/working out to look good.. for them to dress in a way which society as a whole, deems 'good' requires more effort.. hair, makeup, clothes, aperance, grooming, shaving, hair removal, etc.. all takes far far longer then for guys..
So whereas a guy may need to go to the gym, and work harder for longer... he can then spend relitivly little time before going out, and look good.. - for girls it can be the oposite, less time in the gym, but more time on the other aspects of 'looking good'
- in terms of self perception, girls have it a lot worse..
Statistics dont lie on this. more girls have body issues, and more girls harm and kill themselves each year due to body issues, and body-size related bullying. - whether the causes come from guys, girls, the media, themseleves, etc.. its not really up for debate that girls can be much more harsh on themselves, then guys can... (including the old steryotype of the guy who is ugly, but looks in the mirror and goes 'not bad.. looking fine today')
Overal.. I would say:
Both require equal effort to look good, but the effort is spent on different parts of the process.
Girls still get given a harder time by the media, about their looks (though it is becoming more equal by the year)
Both are judged on their looks, but by different groups, and by different criteria.
Girls have a far harder time, personally, with accepting and dealing with how they look (on average)
Both have a number of things that cannot be changed, and a number which can.. but they are sligtly different between the sexes
[*disclaimer - huge huge huge huge generalisations.. but hey, what do you expect when trying to talk about 'girls' and 'guys' as single identities...]
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by civilstudent
Ok so many women care about height/bone structure but so do men when it comes to women..wide hips, long legs and all that. Obviously people like different things too but it was my own perspective that made me start the thead, or maybe a bit of resentment lol. In the gym I saw a man chatting up a women basically staring at her chest and she didnt have a particularly 'good/toned body'. At the time I thought meh I can work out all day but my body wont be classed as being as good as someone with a chest like that. Then I thought its ok for guys they can just build muscle or 'get ripped' and they will have a great body..as I thought thats what generally women liked. At least thats what I like, but maybe Im over generalising.
So yea depending on the importance men place on breasts (which according to you is not much) I just saw it as very hard for some women to obtain a body they just don't have. Obviously with wanting to be toned/fit I didn't even think of and would never consider gaining weight to increase breast size. To be fair its not that simple anyway I don't know about others but any extra weight goes straight to my thighs/hips.
I guess from the replies I can see the bigger picture now though so yea I suppose its not really harder for women to get a better body (unless you include decent breasts lol).
No sarcasm, though there must be a reason you suspect it its not just the smiley!
So yea depending on the importance men place on breasts (which according to you is not much) I just saw it as very hard for some women to obtain a body they just don't have. Obviously with wanting to be toned/fit I didn't even think of and would never consider gaining weight to increase breast size. To be fair its not that simple anyway I don't know about others but any extra weight goes straight to my thighs/hips.
I guess from the replies I can see the bigger picture now though so yea I suppose its not really harder for women to get a better body (unless you include decent breasts lol).
No sarcasm, though there must be a reason you suspect it its not just the smiley!
Lol no it's not. Women who work hard get results, just like men. Women just tend to think going on a treadmill twice a week will give them an amazing body.
Original post by Bassetts
Finally, so you're conceding your argument and getting it into your head that women have it a lot easier?
No, Im willing to agree that, looking at the bigger picture, women don't really have it harder when it comes to obtaining the ideal physique.
Grass ain't always greener and all that
Original post by Katie_p
I think it's much easier for girls, personally. Every girl has bums, legs and boobs, even if there's not very much of one or more of them. Most guys don't even mind a bit of extra weight if you have nice assets, and if your assets aren't so great but you're fit and healthy, I think you're still pretty attractive to most guys, especally if you've got a nice face.
But guys are expected to be fit, most women want them to be muscly. For a guy, a few extra pounds really does matter, and there aren't any of the natural assets that women have that they can rely on instead. Guys are expected to work out to get a good body, whereas most girls naturally have one that is pretty attractive to at least some of the opposite sex before they do anything. It's a hell of a lot easier to just stay reasonably slim and healthy than it is to maintain the kind of body a lot of girls expect.
The female form is naturally a lot more attractive than the male one.
But guys are expected to be fit, most women want them to be muscly. For a guy, a few extra pounds really does matter, and there aren't any of the natural assets that women have that they can rely on instead. Guys are expected to work out to get a good body, whereas most girls naturally have one that is pretty attractive to at least some of the opposite sex before they do anything. It's a hell of a lot easier to just stay reasonably slim and healthy than it is to maintain the kind of body a lot of girls expect.
The female form is naturally a lot more attractive than the male one.
I think it's even. Society has put very high expectations of how girls should look whereas men don't have make-up and the general slim body shape.
Original post by The Epicurean
Some girls are naturally slim and some are naturally bigger. I don't deny that. But I was saying that most of the pressure for women to look slim comes not from men but mostly from women and women's magazines.
Yeah, and surely men get pressure from men and the media to be big and strong? I can't think of many girls in real life that like very muscly men.
The source is irrelevant; the expectations exist which men and women struggle with equally.
Original post by nicatre
Both sexes seem to have an awfully linear expectation of the attractive values of the other sex.
Not really helpful to this thread, just an observation.
Not really helpful to this thread, just an observation.
I imagine that actually that's one of the most helpful remarks made thus far. After all, trying to suggest that one series of gender norms re attractiveness are less demanding than the other as a whole may be avoided if people begun to realise how linear their expectations were. After all, the idea that 'guys' are singularly interested in breasts and ass is just as pernicious and false as the idea that 'women' are singularly interested in somebody who possesses a developed upper torso.
Hello 
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Sorry to bother you all, I was wondering if any females would be willing to complete an online survey for my dissertation project, it would be appreciated. Thanks http://www.surveygizmo.com/s3/1379570/Self-compassion-as-a-function-of-disordered-eating-attitudes-and-behaviours-in-women
Original post by The Epicurean
I find that a lot of that pressure comes from women themselves and women's magazines. I think most men aren't too concerned if a girl isn't a size zero 
This.
I had a discussion with some male and female friends and the girls said that the pressure they felt and the ridicule they ever received aesthetically was from the judgements of other girls. Guys really don't care about most (if not all) of the things girls worry about.
Oh go away we have to workout
Do you know how hard it is to build muscle???
all women have to pretty much do is cardion unless they wanna look like fitness models
Building muscle takes stupid amounts of dedication and time
If loosing fat was all men had to be happy with their looks then it would be a hell of a lot more easier
Do you know how hard it is to build muscle???
all women have to pretty much do is cardion unless they wanna look like fitness models
Building muscle takes stupid amounts of dedication and time
If loosing fat was all men had to be happy with their looks then it would be a hell of a lot more easier
But I wouldn't date a guy who was physically really fit but had an unattractive face/personality.
...and plus, guys can't/don't really wear make up.
...and plus, guys can't/don't really wear make up.
Sorry but it really isn't that easy. None of you girls seem to realise the time and effort that goes into getting a good body!! I go to the gym for about 8 hours a week and I'm still not toned/ ripped :L
Original post by yaboy
Oh go away we have to workout
Do you know how hard it is to build muscle???
all women have to pretty much do is cardion unless they wanna look like fitness models
Building muscle takes stupid amounts of dedication and time
If loosing fat was all men had to be happy with their looks then it would be a hell of a lot more easier
Do you know how hard it is to build muscle???
all women have to pretty much do is cardion unless they wanna look like fitness models
Building muscle takes stupid amounts of dedication and time
If loosing fat was all men had to be happy with their looks then it would be a hell of a lot more easier
Totally agree, girls just have to control weight to have good bodies, guys have to not only lose fat but add muscle too!
Original post by civilstudent
I dont care about makeup thats just something that can be wiped off. Im more about the body than makeup/hair and all that. I like to improve my body but despite keeping toned/strength training etc the first thing guys see is a flat chest.
Then you are working out for all the wrong reasons tbh
Workout for yourself first and foremost, attention from guys should be secondary
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