Girls, would you still continue to go out with your boyfriend if you fancied another?
So, if you knew another guy that you were attracted to more and knew maybe only a little or maybe quite a bit would you still go out with your present boyfriend knowing it might put him of asking you out.
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Original post by Anonymous
So, if you knew another guy that you were attracted to more and knew maybe only a little or maybe quite a bit would you still go out with your present boyfriend knowing it might put him of asking you out.
I'm really not sure what that means so I'm going to have a little bit of a guess.
I think you're asking if because you have a current boyfriend is going to put off your other guy friend from asking you out. Yes, it will. Unless this guy is an absolute tw** he will NOT ask you out while you have a boyfriend. If he does, I would be concerned for how he'll treat you, particularly if you don't know him that well. Definitely sounds like the kind of guy who would cheat imo if he did
But for the love of God tell your boyfriend. Don't keep going out with him if you don't love him, and don't mess him around.. Just say.
(edited 9 years ago)
That seems like a pretty ****ty situation for the boyfriend, to be honest. 
Considering I'm in a long term relationship, I wouldn't dream of leaving him for a guy I barely knew.
Original post by cah846
Considering I'm in a long term relationship, I wouldn't dream of leaving him for a guy I barely knew.
Even if you were attracted to the other guy more? hypothetically speaking
If I loved my bf and vice versa then yes. I wouldn't let a silly crush on someone else ruin our relationship 
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Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by LydiaFirefly<3
If I loved my bf and vice versa then yes. I wouldn't let a silly crush on someone else ruin our relationship
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Well, I guess I mean more than a crush, a fairly long term attraction to a guy, at least quite a fair bit greater attraction than towards your present boyfriend, maybe a lot greater. Even if there was some degree of attraction to your present boyfriend, vice versa?
Original post by Anonymous
Well, I guess I mean more than a crush, a fairly long term attraction to a guy, at least quite a fair bit greater attraction than towards your present boyfriend, maybe a lot greater. Even if there was some degree of attraction to your present boyfriend, vice versa?
What if you stop dating your present boyfriend, only to never have the better guy ask you out though. It'd be risky.
If the relationship wasn't long term and I found the other person more attractive and far more appealing than my boyfriend, I'd have to at least consider it...
But I'd never leave my boyfriend for someone else. Especially not if I only found them attractive, they could be a horrible person. I just wouldn't tbh
But I'd never leave my boyfriend for someone else. Especially not if I only found them attractive, they could be a horrible person. I just wouldn't tbh
Original post by Anonymous
Even if you were attracted to the other guy more? hypothetically speaking
No, I've put too much trust into this relationship to risk it, and he's put as much trust in me too, I wouldn't put him through that kind of pain.
Original post by chelseajanett
If the relationship wasn't long term and I found the other person more attractive and far more appealing than my boyfriend, I'd have to at least consider it...
But I'd never leave my boyfriend for someone else. Especially not if I only found them attractive, they could be a horrible person. I just wouldn't tbh
But I'd never leave my boyfriend for someone else. Especially not if I only found them attractive, they could be a horrible person. I just wouldn't tbh
Well, when I say attractive I guess I really mean if there was a lot of chemistry there. Why would you never leave your boyfriend for someone else?
Original post by Anonymous
Well, when I say attractive I guess I really mean if there was a lot of chemistry there. Why would you never leave your boyfriend for someone else?
I think it'd be a big risk, personally I wouldn't because I don't think, at the moment, that I could be better suited to anyone else. I know people who've been in this exact situation and I've never seen it work out, in fact, I've often seen the one who left going back to the first person. I guess things like that have convinced me that it couldn't work?
Original post by cah846
No, I've put too much trust into this relationship to risk it, and he's put as much trust in me too, I wouldn't put him through that kind of pain.
But what exactly would you be risking? Is trust more important to you than being with someone where there is more chemistry hypothetically speaking? I mean you often see girls eyeing other guys up and thereby giving them the come on, why do they do this if they want to be faithful to there current boyfriend?
Original post by Anonymous
But what exactly would you be risking? Is trust more important to you than being with someone where there is more chemistry hypothetically speaking? I mean you often see girls eyeing other guys up and thereby giving them the come on, why do they do this if they want to be faithful to there current boyfriend?
I've been with him almost three years, I've trusted him with everything I hold dear, I have plenty of chemistry with him, and if said hypothetical guy wasn't actually as interested or nice as my current boyfriend, say if he was just out for a ONS, then I've trashed three years of love and trust for nothing, broken my boyfriend's heart and trust and ruined my own life to boot.
Original post by Anonymous
So, if you knew another guy that you were attracted to more and knew maybe only a little or maybe quite a bit would you still go out with your present boyfriend knowing it might put him of asking you out.
this just means you are NOT ready to COMMIT in any relationship because there will always be someone else you are attracted to. You should be honest with your bf and maybe just stay single for a while or play the field..
Original post by Anonymous
Well, I guess I mean more than a crush, a fairly long term attraction to a guy, at least quite a fair bit greater attraction than towards your present boyfriend, maybe a lot greater. Even if there was some degree of attraction to your present boyfriend, vice versa?
Ah I see, maybe that'd be a different matter. Depends how my crush felt about me. If he didn't like me then I'd try and forget it and focus on building a stronger relationship with my boyfriend
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So, you mean your boyfriend just isn't that compatible with you?
I am the kind of person that wants strong, genuine, long-term commitment.
If I met someone else and felt I got along a lot better with them and was more generally compatible with them than my current boyfriend, then I would doubt whether I had made the right life choice in being with him. If the doubt was considerable enough to become a certainty that I would and could be better off with a different kind of person, then I would leave him.
I wouldn't go out with the other guy straight away though. That can be a mistake - jumping straight into another relationship when you didn't feel your first one was good enough. I would wait some weeks at least if not months depending on how serious my relationship was. I'd probably be getting to know the new guy more, letting the dust settle and thinking about everything to do with my previous relationship - whether I was wrong or right to leave it, positives and negatives, seeing how life is on my own without anyone else to get a better feel for how exactly I myself want to live. If I end up choosing to spend all my time with this new person though, that would be a sign - but I would hold back from getting romantically involved until I was sure they were right for me and it wasn't purely because I was used to having someone close out of habit. If they really suit me well and are looking for the same things I am (serious, longterm) they probably won't mind waiting, getting to know me more first too. If they walk away, aren't having as much fun with me as I am with them just because it's not yet intimate, I doubt they were right.
That's just me though, I take this kind of thing seriously because I'm in it for potentially a lifetime and don't want to mess around with anyone.
I would want to show my previous partner due respect, because there would have been a reason I got together with them - they wouldn't be a bad person, just not the right person for me to be with, so I would want them to understand that with all the reasons we weren't as compatible as I want so they can move on as healthily as possible. Not just think I 'upgraded' as soon as I could. I love and respect all people I feel like I know or have been drawn to before, basically, even if they do bad things or we need to part ways (I wouldn't expect this of people escaping abusive relationships, mind).
Not everyone is like me, I understand that. So it seems to me like what you are going to do instead is wait until this guy makes a move on you, or make a move on him, and only then leave your boyfriend.
It happens.
I wouldn't feel comfortable with someone who made a move on me while I was in a relationship, they would have gathered if they knew me at all that was a terrible idea against my values. It would rule them out for me, someone who would disrespect both me and someone I cared about. Other people don't feel it that way though.
I am the kind of person that wants strong, genuine, long-term commitment.
If I met someone else and felt I got along a lot better with them and was more generally compatible with them than my current boyfriend, then I would doubt whether I had made the right life choice in being with him. If the doubt was considerable enough to become a certainty that I would and could be better off with a different kind of person, then I would leave him.
I wouldn't go out with the other guy straight away though. That can be a mistake - jumping straight into another relationship when you didn't feel your first one was good enough. I would wait some weeks at least if not months depending on how serious my relationship was. I'd probably be getting to know the new guy more, letting the dust settle and thinking about everything to do with my previous relationship - whether I was wrong or right to leave it, positives and negatives, seeing how life is on my own without anyone else to get a better feel for how exactly I myself want to live. If I end up choosing to spend all my time with this new person though, that would be a sign - but I would hold back from getting romantically involved until I was sure they were right for me and it wasn't purely because I was used to having someone close out of habit. If they really suit me well and are looking for the same things I am (serious, longterm) they probably won't mind waiting, getting to know me more first too. If they walk away, aren't having as much fun with me as I am with them just because it's not yet intimate, I doubt they were right.
That's just me though, I take this kind of thing seriously because I'm in it for potentially a lifetime and don't want to mess around with anyone.
I would want to show my previous partner due respect, because there would have been a reason I got together with them - they wouldn't be a bad person, just not the right person for me to be with, so I would want them to understand that with all the reasons we weren't as compatible as I want so they can move on as healthily as possible. Not just think I 'upgraded' as soon as I could. I love and respect all people I feel like I know or have been drawn to before, basically, even if they do bad things or we need to part ways (I wouldn't expect this of people escaping abusive relationships, mind).
Not everyone is like me, I understand that. So it seems to me like what you are going to do instead is wait until this guy makes a move on you, or make a move on him, and only then leave your boyfriend.
It happens.
I wouldn't feel comfortable with someone who made a move on me while I was in a relationship, they would have gathered if they knew me at all that was a terrible idea against my values. It would rule them out for me, someone who would disrespect both me and someone I cared about. Other people don't feel it that way though.
(edited 9 years ago)
No, move on when someone better comes along. Not settling for second best lol
Not srs
Not srs
It depends how I felt about my boyfriend. Firstly, if I didn't know try 2nd guy and it was just physical then no chance, I'd just avoid him out of respect to my boyfriend. If I did know him and had genuine feelings then I'd tell my boyfriend, because he deserves to know and decide whether he still wants to be with me and work on things. If he does, I'd cut contact with the guy and work on our relationship. If I was really, really into the guy and couldn't shake it, then yeah, I'd break up with my boyfriend. I don't envisage that happening though.
Original post by AdamCee
I'm really not sure what that means so I'm going to have a little bit of a guess.
I think you're asking if because you have a current boyfriend is going to put off your other guy friend from asking you out. Yes, it will. Unless this guy is an absolute tw** he will NOT ask you out while you have a boyfriend. If he does, I would be concerned for how he'll treat you, particularly if you don't know him that well. Definitely sounds like the kind of guy who would cheat imo if he did
But for the love of God tell your boyfriend. Don't keep going out with him if you don't love him, and don't mess him around.. Just say.
I think you're asking if because you have a current boyfriend is going to put off your other guy friend from asking you out. Yes, it will. Unless this guy is an absolute tw** he will NOT ask you out while you have a boyfriend. If he does, I would be concerned for how he'll treat you, particularly if you don't know him that well. Definitely sounds like the kind of guy who would cheat imo if he did
But for the love of God tell your boyfriend. Don't keep going out with him if you don't love him, and don't mess him around.. Just say.
cheaters attract cheaters.
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