I wish Id never applied for uni
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these look like Freshers Facebook pages. https://www.facebook.com/groups/BirminghamFreshers2014/?ref=br_rs
https://www.facebook.com/groups/BirminghamFreshers2014/?ref=br_rs
Speak to people at your Student Union as they will have heard it many times and may even know of people who would like to swap accommodation.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/BirminghamFreshers2014/?ref=br_rs
Speak to people at your Student Union as they will have heard it many times and may even know of people who would like to swap accommodation.
Original post by itsalwayswendy
I totally understand what your saying ive thought about seeing it from a different perspective! I have spoken to atleast two of the girls on their own and they did sit down and have a small conversation with me. But when they are in their big group thats when things turn awkward and almost act like we have never spoke but yeah im going to see it through for another few weeks and see how i feel. But i highly doubt things will change.
Oh and as for the lessons same thing happend i sat with a group of people they seemed nice at first until they eventually started to ignore me in the group discussions we had, so eventually i stopped forcing myself, as the other group are like in their mid 20s its probably best i sit solo.
Oh and as for the lessons same thing happend i sat with a group of people they seemed nice at first until they eventually started to ignore me in the group discussions we had, so eventually i stopped forcing myself, as the other group are like in their mid 20s its probably best i sit solo.
Damn, that sucks. I get that you don't want to push for it but then try the other things I mentioned. Especially joining a society- you'll meet people with the same interests as you so you'll have loads to talk about and they'll all be completely welcoming. Good luck with everything.
I finished my degree and just got the certificate in the post. I still agree with your thread title.
Dont Get me wrong i understand where some people are coming from with getting myself out there and stuff, but the problem with me is i am shy and socially awkward as hell!! I guess you could say im not used to having to step out my comfort zone, as i have never had to ( i always had family and friends around) and I dont think the uni need to do anything for me I knew that coming to uni would mean complete independence i just never expected to feel or be in the situation that I am in. Its not feeling sorry for myself its evaluating the situation I am in and trying to put the little bits of myself together and fix it.I have started looking at Bcu societies and hopefully from there I can boost my confidence levels and actually "get out there"
Original post by singapaul
what course are you doing, which Birmingham uni are you at?
Oh im not at Birmingahm uni I go to birmingham city (north) i study sociology and criminology
Yup did CompSci at a top 20 school.
One of the worst decisions of my life. I just followed everyone else that went to Uni and chose compsci because I liked using the internet a lot lol.
One of the worst decisions of my life. I just followed everyone else that went to Uni and chose compsci because I liked using the internet a lot lol.
Original post by itsalwayswendy
Coming to birmingham has been the worst month of my life!! Everyone hypes on how first year is the best when infact its been the worst.
I dont live in halls i live in shared housing with 6 girls.(Long story)They dont talk to me since their 2/3 years, i often avoid being downstairs when they are as i always without fail get awkward stares like why you here! Usually tend to stay in my room and only go out to by take away to ease my depression.
I have no friends in my lectures i sit by myself and discuss in groups by myself. I havent been on a night out once,neither have i been invited. I was never informed of any societies so have never joined and dont know where to either! The uni has not made the experience being here easy and nobody cares much to help you. I get the independent thing, but there must be some obvious out there for people like me right?
Living a life of isolation has given me insomnia, anxiety and mad depression and you would think that in a place like birmingham they would be plenty to do yeah thats if you have friends!! Everyone knows each other and theres just me the loner.. i just really want to drop out and go home work and never ever go back to uni!
I dont live in halls i live in shared housing with 6 girls.(Long story)They dont talk to me since their 2/3 years, i often avoid being downstairs when they are as i always without fail get awkward stares like why you here! Usually tend to stay in my room and only go out to by take away to ease my depression.
I have no friends in my lectures i sit by myself and discuss in groups by myself. I havent been on a night out once,neither have i been invited. I was never informed of any societies so have never joined and dont know where to either! The uni has not made the experience being here easy and nobody cares much to help you. I get the independent thing, but there must be some obvious out there for people like me right?
Living a life of isolation has given me insomnia, anxiety and mad depression and you would think that in a place like birmingham they would be plenty to do yeah thats if you have friends!! Everyone knows each other and theres just me the loner.. i just really want to drop out and go home work and never ever go back to uni!
http://www.bcusu.com/getinvolved/
Theres the list of societies. It is amazing what google gives you.
(edited 9 years ago)
It's sad that anyone should be unhappy - but let me tell you something - it's not going to end at university.
Chances are that if you are struggling socially at university (and by struggling I mean you don't have any friends) why would you think that the rest of your life would be any different. At university it's all laid on for you and every effort is made to bring like minded people together. Grown-up life has no such opportunities or facility.
If you are one of those who is of the opinion that "it's all hype" or "it's not all it's cracked up to be", then seriously what did you expect? Did you think it would be Day 1 - sit down on a wall by yourself with a sandwich and out of nowhere your Bezzie mates for the rest of your life pop out of nowhere and befriend you?
Start meeting people.
Chances are that if you are struggling socially at university (and by struggling I mean you don't have any friends) why would you think that the rest of your life would be any different. At university it's all laid on for you and every effort is made to bring like minded people together. Grown-up life has no such opportunities or facility.
If you are one of those who is of the opinion that "it's all hype" or "it's not all it's cracked up to be", then seriously what did you expect? Did you think it would be Day 1 - sit down on a wall by yourself with a sandwich and out of nowhere your Bezzie mates for the rest of your life pop out of nowhere and befriend you?
Start meeting people.
Original post by 870136
Yeah, I'm hating uni life. 4 weeks into it I've not made a single friend...it's very sad. Going to be awkward when I have no one to live with next year...
Tell me about it! But im thinking of changing course restarting as a first year and moving into a different student hall, could try that hopefully its sociable.
Original post by itsalwayswendy
Tell me about it! But im thinking of changing course restarting as a first year and moving into a different student hall, could try that hopefully its sociable.
I'd like to do that but my course is the only one I want to do/am able to do. I guess I'll have to start planning to make friends at my job in 5 years...
Original post by Clip
It's sad that anyone should be unhappy - but let me tell you something - it's not going to end at university.
Chances are that if you are struggling socially at university (and by struggling I mean you don't have any friends) why would you think that the rest of your life would be any different. At university it's all laid on for you and every effort is made to bring like minded people together. Grown-up life has no such opportunities or facility.
If you are one of those who is of the opinion that "it's all hype" or "it's not all it's cracked up to be", then seriously what did you expect? Did you think it would be Day 1 - sit down on a wall by yourself with a sandwich and out of nowhere your Bezzie mates for the rest of your life pop out of nowhere and befriend you?
Start meeting people.
Chances are that if you are struggling socially at university (and by struggling I mean you don't have any friends) why would you think that the rest of your life would be any different. At university it's all laid on for you and every effort is made to bring like minded people together. Grown-up life has no such opportunities or facility.
If you are one of those who is of the opinion that "it's all hype" or "it's not all it's cracked up to be", then seriously what did you expect? Did you think it would be Day 1 - sit down on a wall by yourself with a sandwich and out of nowhere your Bezzie mates for the rest of your life pop out of nowhere and befriend you?
Start meeting people.
You seem to think not making friends for people is always through lack of effort. I've met a fair few people and have no friends. I don't sit in my room eating a sandwich, I've made every effort and still nothing.
Hey there everyone who has shared their concerns on here!
For all those who say that feel lonely: I am in the same situation, there are many of us. But don't you think that that means we are actually not alone and eventually will meet those in the same situation with us? And trust me I am saying this as a person who joined a lot of societies and who is very active. It has only been a month since university has started, it is impossible for anyone to have made friends for life time, they are just in those groups not because they love each other but just to "not be alone".
Last year I was in a different university, I can't tell you how desperate I was, and the depression I had in the first semester. However, I made all my friends in second the term.
This year I changed to another university in another city (again, as a fresher) and I am lonely all over again. But speaking from experience, we have a lot of time to meet people alike and make true friends. This is only the beginning, so do not worry, it will happen EVENTUALLY.
For all those who say that feel lonely: I am in the same situation, there are many of us. But don't you think that that means we are actually not alone and eventually will meet those in the same situation with us? And trust me I am saying this as a person who joined a lot of societies and who is very active. It has only been a month since university has started, it is impossible for anyone to have made friends for life time, they are just in those groups not because they love each other but just to "not be alone".
Last year I was in a different university, I can't tell you how desperate I was, and the depression I had in the first semester. However, I made all my friends in second the term.
This year I changed to another university in another city (again, as a fresher) and I am lonely all over again. But speaking from experience, we have a lot of time to meet people alike and make true friends. This is only the beginning, so do not worry, it will happen EVENTUALLY.
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