Side effects of unrequited love?

Ok this is the end.

I talked to her for 1hr today in person. I tried to resolve all the issues and try and see if we can be close friends again like we used to. I tried everything. She would not listen.

I said to her look I know I made many mistakes but I am really sorry and I just want another chance. Let me show you I can be ok again with you.

She said no, we can never be close friends again. I don't trust you anymore.

She also said that I know everything about her and she doesn't trust me anymore so she won't talk to me about her life anymore, she doesn't want to sit with me or eat with me anymore.

She says we can just talk sometimes in uni only.

I said to her please reconsider. I almost begged her and I was very close to tears I think. She said no. Don't insist. Then she said she is going to see another friend.

And she walked off.

At that point, I was standing there, in the street, shaking and felt as though I was going to have a breakdown. I had tears in my eyes. I just started to walk and not look back. I somehow got home and I cried (I am not joking).

I can't be friends with her like this. It's just causing me pain and misery. I can't continue.

She is in every single one of my classes. How can I face her now?

Tomorrow we have a lecture at 9am, then a class a 11am. What should I do? I don't even want to look at her. I will just be sad all the time now.

And we have so much group work to do this year. My other friends are friends with her too. How can I work with her. I won't be comfortable with that.

I really don't want to see her again. It's hard enough already.

I never cry. Never. She is the only person I have ever cried for. I don't even know why I cannot control my emotions.

Anyway what now?

I said to you all I wanted to wait til uni and talk in person and if it doesn't work then I will just accept it.

And I did that today. I tried my best. It didn't work.

So now, could you guys tell me how I can go from her? What do I do when I see her?

I won't say hi to her or sit with her. I will just ignore her and sit elsewhere.

Any advice would be great right now.

All you can do s act civil around her.

Believe me. Unrequited love is next to something very bad... I'm speaking from personal experience, so please do excuse the harshness as it is what I had to do to get said guy out of my mind...

It may not be the same for boys/men, but I am aware that girls/young ladies and women in general experience this often... I liked a guy from about age eight or nine... At first, I dismissed all thoughts because I assumed it was just the fact that we were best friends that was making me feel in such a manner for him... Then... when we were about thirteen, I had reached the point where I had idolised him... So, that made it even harder for me to hide that I liked him... He found out at the end of that academic year and after summer, he asks my best friend out... My best friend despised me and didn't really want to be in a relationship with a guy whom she was not interested in... I idolised him until I got to the point where I thought (more mentally screamed and scalded myself) "WHAT THE H*LL ARE YOU DOING?!?! You haven't spoken in over a year and you always want to hide under a rock when you are near him... That's not a relationship I want to be in..."

And basically, after yelling at myself, I just took a step back and let it go as I let him go... I still see him, which is the unfortunate thing... But I can tell that he doesn't give two monkeys because he never makes an effort to even courteously nod or look in my direction. So I know that either he knows what I went through and has been through the same thing, or knows and doesn't give... Or... Just doesn't care for a monkey...

I shortened this big time... The last time I tried to tell this story, it took me four hours... Just saying...

BUT... If you need someone to talk to... I'm here...

Look she's told you this all before over summer so it's hardly news she doesn't want to be your friend anymore. Now can you finally stop chasing after and her and take proactive steps to move on? I'm not going to gloat but I said this would happen and it will continue to happen until you just let her go.

How to move on? Make goals. You are in your last year of uni so bury yourself in work. Go to the gym and lift weight. Focus on other friends and hang out with them instead. Get back some respect and self-confidence cos right now behaving like you are is completely unattractive to girls.

Ok, I will try that. Yes self confidence is practically non existent right now.

Hallelujah I think we might be getting somewhere. Seriously make a list of goals to aim for and the more you stick to pursuing them, the more your attention will divert away from this girl. What are you averaging in your degree atm? Ask another friend to go with you to the cinema or out for something social. Live and breathe enjoyment in your last year of uni cos when that time is over, you don't want to look back and let this experience overshadow the most formative years of your life.

I got around 73% in my first although (although that doesn't count), and last year i got 82% overall for the year so I am doing quite well.

I do have a couple of guy friends and yeah I do goto the cinema or other places here and there with them.

Exactly, I don't want this whole girl situation as the highlight of my uni. I want to enjoy it a bit as it's my last year and I will always miss it.

My goals are now are doing well this year in uni, and improving my health. I have really slacked off my eating and gym because I have always been stressed about her. Whenever things are bad between me and her, I just let it affect my whole life and it really puts me in a bad place mentally as well as physically.

Right now I am filled with worry, sadness and anxiety. I miss talking to her like we used to. It makes me really sad how easily she just forgot our friendship and just replaced me with her other friends. It really hurts

See all of that positive stuff you listed? It sounds like despite this whole situation, you do have a brain somewhere in your head! Now that you've finally seen that it's truly over, you can properly focus on trying to move on and sorting some kind of life out for yourself. You're right in that you want to enjoy uni, and now you can do that. Get out there, meet new people, stick with the ones you already know and please please please try to forget about her. I know you'll be hurting but now is the perfect time to just cut her out of your life. Good luck to you.

I know. I am trying. I really don't even feel like going to uni right now because I will see her there and that will really put me into despair. I am so uncomfortable around her right now I cannot even think properly. I am definitely hurting right now.

I feel alone right now. When she walked away from me, it really tore me inside. I just stood there motionless. I never want to experience something like that again. It really affected me a lot.

Now I will see her in my classes today at uni. I am not looking forward to that

It says I got reported (and taken down, by the way) for revealing your identity 😭

Yes, it is a horrible experience. But honestly, she doesn't sound worth you getting upset over her. Time is a healer, and whilst it seems difficult now, the more you distance yourself from her, the more you'll start to feel better.

Ok. By the way, we are already in the same group. There is me, 2 of my guy friends, her, and her friend. So we will need to work together. :/

DON'T HELP THIS GUY!

HE HAS A THREAD WITH 111 PAGES OF ANSWERS: http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=3214053

IT'S LITERALLY USELESS AT THIS POINT

5 of you. So you can work with the other 3 people and barely speak to her. That isn't that bad.

I'd like to know what degree this is where it seems most of the work is allocated in groups.

Does seem a bit odd. I've only just started at uni but I've already seen the vast majority of work is independent.

I'd like to know what degree this is where it seems most of the work is allocated in groups.