my gf still talks to her ex a lot. Am i in the wrong for being bothered by this?

My girlfriend still talks to her ex almost every day and it really bothers me.

Basically we started seeing each other while she was still in a weird sort of long distance "open relationship" with him but she never called him her boyfriend as it was her "best friend" who she started sleeping with. Even after we spent every day together she still went back home and slept with him once. I brought up several times before she left how much this bothered me but she still did it. When she got back she told me it was only once and it didn't feel right so things were finished between them and we decided to be exclusive.

Fast forward a few weeks and this guy comes through for halloween, stays at her place and shares a bed with her. Nothing happened (I trust her completely) but at my halloween party he started talking badly about her to other people (slut etc. even though he slept with other girls). Now he still continues to message her trying to convince her to leave me for him, even saying things like calling me unattractive compared to him etc.

And still, after all this, she calls him her "friend" and messages him all the time.

i just brought up that it bothers me and she's made me feel like i'm the one in the wrong here. Am i the one in the wrong? Am i just being stupid by letting this bother me? It's not like i think something will happen between them but for some reason it still bothers me.

Reply 1

DabThruUni

I think if they were genuinely close friends, then it's probably hard for her to break up with him bc of an emotional attachment. Personally, I always find it hard to end things with someone I'm close to bc they understand me and I understand them and there's just a whole lot of history ya know?

However, this whole friends with benefits thing this girl had, I say i I don't blame you for feeling bothered by it. If it was the other way round your gf would deffo want you to end things with your side chick. I guess you just gotta put it into perspective for her. If she gets it, she'll break up with this other dude if she cares about you enough.