how bad would it be

otherwise i was going to go one step further and say my interest first began when I was in my mothers womb and I read Plato for the first time

No one would ever take you seriously...after reading the tutors would either think your having them on, not take the rest of ur statement seriously or, as most would, just close the page and move on to the next ps

That is prob the worst opening...why? Because its ******...NO ONE knows what exactly they want to do till they are at least a teenager...you dont just come out of your mother womb and think to yourself...'oh hey, i wanna be a architecht, or, dentistry would really suit me'

i think it's an excellent idea go for it, it's very original and the admissions tutor will be sure to be interested straight away

Okay you've missed the joke. it's because you always see people with their little stories saying I have been interested in this subject since I was 5,6 whatever or since this happened etc. and that has never happened to me, i haven't been interested in this subject forever well anyways I found it funny
your first paragraph does make a valid point though

No i can see what your trying to do, but the people who read these are dead serious people...and honestly, unless you do that at an interview, how could an admissions tutor tell if your just trying to be light-hearted...its a word document, they cant see body language, change in tone of voice, neither will they notice facial expressions...just saying, if you do write that, your just dooming yourself

Obviously try and be original, but not in the cheesy or not believable way, as it'll only make things worse...these people get THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of applicants, and they would do anything to narrow it down, and to me, this is a good enough excuse to just close the page down and move on

okay it is sort of meant as a joke even though we are told to avoid to avoid humour, i just can't bring myself to write one totally seriously it's just so cheesy it really annoys me and it's never actually personal
I am thinking about doing philosophy so could I then not lead it on to questions about existance or is it a NO
otherwise i was going to go one step further and say my interest first began when I was in my mothers womb and I read Plato for the first time

I started my personal statement with a mild bit of humour, but it was a true story:

"I can pinpoint the start of my love of Philosophy to coming across ‘Sophie's World’ whilst scouring my Dad’s bookshelf. Unfortunately, I was only eight at the time and did not get past the Greek natural philosophers."

Yours seems to be going a bit far though. Bear in mind there's a pretty high chance that the admissions tutor wont get the joke or wont find it funny.