Best friend ditched me when he got into a relationship

I’m a woman and have been close friends with a guy from Uni for years, literally since uni. We used to talk loads and go places and it was just an amazing friendship. So I got into a relationship over a year before he did and around this time, he was talking about going on dating apps and finding himself someone (Copycat lol). He eventually found someone he wanted to be with and our friendship seemed to continue as normal. Recently though that has all changed. He made some comment when I went home from one of our last hang outs like ‘obviously [his gf’s name] comes first cos that’s who I’m dating’ and idk I felt really insulted by that.

I didn’t ditch him for my relationship and it’s like he wants to throw away like 3 years of friendship for some girl he met a few months ago?! And he’s just been blanking my messages, taking ages to reply, not organising to hang out anymore etc.

I thought it’s because I’m a woman- But just because it’s a boy and girl being friends it doesn’t mean I’m like a threat to her or something, we’ve been friends for years. Even my bf doesnt care if me and him hung out. We even went on a trip together for days and he was fine with it because we’re friends and always will be. He’s absolutely NOT someone I’d date or be attracted to ever and that’s fair enough. If she’s insecure then that’s her problem.

Also, even when I did get to hang out with him in the early stages, he would just keep talking about her almost like bragging or showing off and I was bored of it because he’d say the same old thing and I wouldn’t know what to even say.

I’m beginning to think he’s just a fake friend, because friends shouldn’t leave when something different happens in their life. I treat my friends with the same respect as I always have. There’s no excuses tbh.

But yeah I just want my friend back
But I don’t think I’ll get him back will I? Anyone got any similar experience/ advice?

I’m assuming you’re in your teens. In the adult world, it would be a huge red flag if partners were spending time alone with a member of the opposite sex… Part of growing up is acknowledging that relationships with friends (regardless of gender) will become more distant when they have partners, they are each other’s best friend now and healthy boundaries need to be respected. She could potentially be the person he will spend the rest of his life with.

I know it hurts, but as you get older, you realise you’re not going to be living and sharing your life with friends but with your partner.

It’s not personal, and also the way boys word things may sound abit cold sometimes! You just need to take it in your stride as a part of growing up and entering adulthood.

I had a very similar experience as you but my friend was a girl. Started dating a boy at 14, now if I had prioritised my relationship with her, I don’t think 8 years later I’d have married that boy! Me and the girl are still good friends as she has a boyfriend now and we all spend time together. So try and get yourself a fella and the four of you hang out🙂