Right so in 2020 or so I started to like this girl, she was still figuring out her sexuality so she kinda pushed me away, but after a few months she realised she was bi and had feelings for me.
We started to date on and off for two years, it became toxic as I couldn't trust her with her friends and she was too clingy whilst I wasn't great at keeping my emotions in.
We still loved each other unconditionally, sentimentally, and sexually, until one day I got super mad about this guy she was super close with who liked her and wanted her but she kept reassuring me that she didn't want him. I ended up walking away and she followed me because she wanted to sort **** out but I was having none of it. She gave up and I called her apologising but it seemed to have been too late.
A few months later, she confided in me about a guy threatening her and her family. I wanted to help and then she subtly dropped hints at him having her nudes, which was weird as we had been together the entire time she lived in the country..?
He then found me on Lobby and sent me her nudes, a few of which I had already seen (from her). I got mad at her for cheating but she said we weren't together at the time, but the guy confirmed the times and we were most likely together. He found people from our school (I accept no responsibility for that icl) and leaked her nudes to everyone.
She kept spamming me and asking me to go to her house so we could "sort stuff out". I kept blowing her off using stupid excuses like "oh my mum wants me home" or "oh I don't wanna walk in the rain" (knowing damn well her house is 10 mins away from mine LOL).
The next day, her little brother texted me on Discord (I didn't see it) and came up to me in person, and said the following
"Shiloh I found something worrying on ****'s computer can you come over and help please?"
I was reluctant but also thought about how it could be her nudes and how he was legit 11 so I felt obligated to help.
So after school, we walked to their house and I talked to him about how me and his sister had a thing (I'm sure he had a feeling from the number of times he had walked in on us) and he acted surprised and ****
He snuck me in through the back so the doorbell wouldn't show me, then took me to her room, which I found strange because he had said prior she wasn't home and that he wanted to sneak me in. He then pushed me into her room and threatened me with a taser telling me to "try nothing funny". He left the room. I sat down on the bed (I did try to leave prior), and she asked me if I thought that her nudes getting leaked was funny, me, being the joker I am, said 'yes because you cheated on me' and smirked. She grabbed me and I grabbed her back (keep in mind I am taller than her but I still loved her) and we began to 'tussle'. My objective was getting the **** out of that house whilst hers was getting me on the bed to do what she pleases (she didn't SA me or anything by the way, so don't think you need to click off). I eventually gave up and she slapped me and told me to say sorry, I did. She slapped me again and told me that if I ever do anything like that again she'll kill me. I told her to get the **** off of me cus I wasn't gonna fight back against an untrained girl when I was MMA trained and she instead spat on me and began to choke me. Her mum was awoken by all the commotion and stepped in between us. She made me stay and explain the situation, and me being too good for her, I defended her. In some sick and twisted way, I still loved that ***** man. Then I went to leave her house and she begged me to stay so that her mum wouldn't do anything. I said I'm sorry but I'm gonna be late home (I was being honest this time) and then I think I gave her a kiss on the forehead or cheek or something it's all kinda a haze.
Long story short, my best friends went and confronted her, and because of that the school found out about everything.
It's been 6 months since that happened and now me and her talk a bit. Not once have we actually talked about that day, because she denies it happened. I don't like her again but she was my first and only love, and I was her first love also. I guess I miss what we had? I have a feeling she does too, because she seems to be super random in her excuses to have contact with me, and her second-best love left her.
Do I keep talking to her? I know you lot are gonna immediately say no, as I would, but actually be fair in your explanations and put some thought into it.
Thanks,
Shiloh.