The Student Room Group

Not sure what to do now...

Hiya, So I started Sixth Form last September (I really don't know why, looking back) it's the first year of our SF so there is just year 12 and most of the people have already been at the school for 5 years, but a couple of others joined, one of whom (a girl) I soon became quite friendly with, I only saw her as a friend until about 2 months back, and we hadn't really spoken out of school for long periods of time, which of course changed.

We had been having quite a laugh using tinder (Obviously as a joke) and I started to get a better idea of what she is like, and started to like her a bit, and so started snapchatting quite a lot, got her number and so on, I knew I liked her but didn't want to make it seem that way because we had become quite close friends, eventually got the courage to ask her out, she told me she would rather 'focus on school' which I think is completely fine, especially at A-Level. I kept talking to her, and she was really cool about it and didn't make a big thing of it, but subconsciously I still liked her, so another few weeks went by we snapchatted more, texted more, facetimed once or twice, then I asked if we could get together in the holidays, which she said yes to, I wasn't sure if I was asking her out as a friend or more than that though, so I just left it and was gonna see what it was like while we were out.

Last day of term, we weren't in lessons or anything so all of year 12 were together, at the end everyone just sort of split off and did their own thing in their own groups, and I went with her, but I had never really spent time with anyone else who was there. So once I got home we didn't say anything, then I sent a snapchat and she texted me an essay, saying she can tell I like her and she doesn't see me like that and is more interested in having fun (?) so I say that's fine and I don't want things to be weird, next day I said please don't let this get in the way of us being friends, you know I'm a down to earth kind of guy, to which she said its getting weird I'm texting her all the time (I had messaged 3 times).

After all of this I just thought it's best to give it time, I hadn't spoken to her for like 5 days, she unfriended me on Snapchat and I asked if we were cool now, she never replied.I'm no expert on any of this, but I have no idea what to do next, I want to be friends with her, but she's making it difficult.

Thanks
Original post by Anonymous
Hiya, So I started Sixth Form last September (I really don't know why, looking back) it's the first year of our SF so there is just year 12 and most of the people have already been at the school for 5 years, but a couple of others joined, one of whom (a girl) I soon became quite friendly with, I only saw her as a friend until about 2 months back, and we hadn't really spoken out of school for long periods of time, which of course changed.

We had been having quite a laugh using tinder (Obviously as a joke) and I started to get a better idea of what she is like, and started to like her a bit, and so started snapchatting quite a lot, got her number and so on, I knew I liked her but didn't want to make it seem that way because we had become quite close friends, eventually got the courage to ask her out, she told me she would rather 'focus on school' which I think is completely fine, especially at A-Level. I kept talking to her, and she was really cool about it and didn't make a big thing of it, but subconsciously I still liked her, so another few weeks went by we snapchatted more, texted more, facetimed once or twice, then I asked if we could get together in the holidays, which she said yes to, I wasn't sure if I was asking her out as a friend or more than that though, so I just left it and was gonna see what it was like while we were out.

Last day of term, we weren't in lessons or anything so all of year 12 were together, at the end everyone just sort of split off and did their own thing in their own groups, and I went with her, but I had never really spent time with anyone else who was there. So once I got home we didn't say anything, then I sent a snapchat and she texted me an essay, saying she can tell I like her and she doesn't see me like that and is more interested in having fun (?) so I say that's fine and I don't want things to be weird, next day I said please don't let this get in the way of us being friends, you know I'm a down to earth kind of guy, to which she said its getting weird I'm texting her all the time (I had messaged 3 times).

After all of this I just thought it's best to give it time, I hadn't spoken to her for like 5 days, she unfriended me on Snapchat and I asked if we were cool now, she never replied.I'm no expert on any of this, but I have no idea what to do next, I want to be friends with her, but she's making it difficult.

Thanks


She's basically saying that she likes you but she needs to push you away from her because she wants to focus on education, she is scared about her own feelings and because she thinks that she just has to do it in her own mind
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
Hiya, So I started Sixth Form last September (I really don't know why, looking back) it's the first year of our SF so there is just year 12 and most of the people have already been at the school for 5 years, but a couple of others joined, one of whom (a girl) I soon became quite friendly with, I only saw her as a friend until about 2 months back, and we hadn't really spoken out of school for long periods of time, which of course changed.

We had been having quite a laugh using tinder (Obviously as a joke) and I started to get a better idea of what she is like, and started to like her a bit, and so started snapchatting quite a lot, got her number and so on, I knew I liked her but didn't want to make it seem that way because we had become quite close friends, eventually got the courage to ask her out, she told me she would rather 'focus on school' which I think is completely fine, especially at A-Level. I kept talking to her, and she was really cool about it and didn't make a big thing of it, but subconsciously I still liked her, so another few weeks went by we snapchatted more, texted more, facetimed once or twice, then I asked if we could get together in the holidays, which she said yes to, I wasn't sure if I was asking her out as a friend or more than that though, so I just left it and was gonna see what it was like while we were out.

Last day of term, we weren't in lessons or anything so all of year 12 were together, at the end everyone just sort of split off and did their own thing in their own groups, and I went with her, but I had never really spent time with anyone else who was there. So once I got home we didn't say anything, then I sent a snapchat and she texted me an essay, saying she can tell I like her and she doesn't see me like that and is more interested in having fun (?) so I say that's fine and I don't want things to be weird, next day I said please don't let this get in the way of us being friends, you know I'm a down to earth kind of guy, to which she said its getting weird I'm texting her all the time (I had messaged 3 times).

After all of this I just thought it's best to give it time, I hadn't spoken to her for like 5 days, she unfriended me on Snapchat and I asked if we were cool now, she never replied.I'm no expert on any of this, but I have no idea what to do next, I want to be friends with her, but she's making it difficult.

Thanks

She knows how you feel about her and its making her feel uncomfortable. If you are messaging her 3 times a day then that is too much and you are acting clingy just give her space if she cares she will get in touch if not you have your answer she does not want to be friends. Unfriending you on Snapchat could mean she dosen't want anything to do with you maybe? I don't delete anyone unless they harass me or i no longer want them in my life.

Original post by Anonymous
She's basically saying that she likes you but she needs to push you away from her because she wants to focus on education, she is scared about her own feelings and because she thinks that she just has to do it in her own mind

I think her using 'focus on school' is a way to get him to back off. I think she enjoyed the friendship but realised he was having feelings for her which she didn't want as she said she wants fun.
She even said she dont like him that way so i don't think she has deep feelings for him at all.
To her this is obviously too much and she doesn't like it; to her it's clingy. You need to back off and try to move on; perhaps stop talking to her as much and focus on school.

She doesn't like you and she wants to have fun.

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