Usually in a break up, the girl speaks to her friends and family etc about how she's feeling and they'd support her, while the guy is seen as heartless, as he dumps the girl hopelessly in love with him, he obviously is bitter, bad and other censored words...
That is typically the dynamics society has established for break ups. Ovbiously I'm being very basic about it but my point is that often, the guy is overlooked.
You properly haven't had a chance to 'grieve' the end of the relationship. No matter how long you were together, the point is there once was a time where you were in each other's lives and now that's not the case. The emotions you're feeling now and will continue to feel is your body and mind, dealing with those changes you've faced. And guess what, it gets better. You won't feel this way forever. And it's natural to feel annoyed at the way you are potentially being portrayed. But none of that matters. And this takes me on to my next point.
You talked about loving again and feel that you don't want too in the future as it will only end badly. Firstly, take this time to work on you. Whether that's contining or starting a new hobby like the gym or cooking etc, do things that make you grow as a person. Nurture yourself like you'd nurture another you loved. It's only once you begin to do this, you realise that you deserve love. With the right mindset and attitude, you'll attract a similar likeliness in another. When the time is right, it will happen again. And the doubts you're having will fade away.
Speaking as someone who was wrapped up by someone for six years when I finally walked away and spent a year challenging myself and growing, I honestly learnt some of the most important lessons. I too felt negatively about love but now I welcome it, but am not chasing it.
Just remember you cannot be whole by trying to find yourself in someone else, we have all we need ourselves. So work on that. I hope this helps and gives you some reassurance. If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.
All the best.
H. xx
Help with mine?
http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=4242734&p=66803114#post66803114