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Can we get some sort of nerdy maths/science joke thread going?

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks, "How much is a drink?" The barman says "For you, no charge."

Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
To get to the same side.

Gotta love The Big Bang Theory! :P

Reply 101

Obadetona

I was going to post a chemistry, but I wasn't sure if I'd get a reaction

Reply 102

Contrad!ction.

Original post by sr90

Aww i'm sure its not intentional :hugs:

Come and say hi when more people are on. Its too quiet atm!

I posted when it was active and nobody replied :cry:

Reply 103

Narev

What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?

Nothing - you can't cross a vector with a scalar.

What happened to the statistician when he got thrown into prison?

He had zero degrees of freedom.

Reply 104

InArduisFouette

yo mamma's so fat her escape velocity >3*10^8 m/s

did you hear about the constipated mathematician - he worked it out with pencil and paper ...

Reply 105

tehforum

Original post by Obadetona

I was going to post a chemistry, but I wasn't sure if I'd get a reaction

I think, see pg 5

Reply 106

Obadetona

Original post by tehforum

I think, see pg 5

NOOOO I will have to come up with some original content beard

Reply 107

LtCommanderData

Original post by Pi!

I divided sin by cos the other day. Do you know why?

Just cos!

You mean you divided sin by tan the other day? :tongue:

Reply 108

lorry:)

why could the dog escape from prison? because animal cells don't have walls :biggrin:

its a bit crap, but at least it's original :tongue:

Reply 109

poisoned_rose

Original post by Astronomical

Goodness gracious! I have already stated twice that that is not what I meant. If you fail to grasp the joke, it doesn't make the joke wrong. :rolleyes:

I still don't get how some people DIDN'T get that joke! The whole point is that he says all odds are prime. If you flip that on its head the joke makes no sense...*shakes head*

Reply 110

blacklistmember

Original post by Astronomical

Have you yet to grasp that it is essentially making fun of mathematicians, physicists, and in particular engineers?

Of course 9 is not prime. That is the entire point.

Reply 111

MindlessRobot

Haha, I feel so clever when I actually get the punchline of these jokes :wink:

Reply 112

Jarred

A physicist and engineer and a mathematician were sleeping in a hotel room when a fire broke out in one corner of the room. Only the engineer woke up he saw the fire, grabbed a bucket of water and threw it on the fire and the fire went out, then he filled up the bucket again and threw that bucketfull on the ashes as a safety factor, and he went back to sleep. A little later, another fire broke out in a different corner of the room and only the physicist woke up. He went over measured the intensity of the fire, saw what material was burning and went over and carefully measured out exactly 2/3 of a bucket of water and poured it on, putting out the fire perfectly; the physicist went back to sleep. A little later another fire broke out in a different corner of the room. Only the mathematician woke up. He went over looked at the fire, he saw that there was a bucket and he noticed that it had no holes in it; he turned on the faucet and saw that there was water available. He, thus, concluded that there was a solution to the fire problem and he went back to sleep.

Reply 113

bookworm1997

Original post by levantine

i dont get it

It's a play on words. Like hormone/whore moan.

It's a lot better said, obviously

Reply 114

TheStraightPath

Outside his buckyball home, one molecule overheard another molecule saying, "I'm positive that a free electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ion them."

Reply 115

Coeusful

I've never been more proud of my TSR brethren than when I came to this thread.

Reply 116

Miller693

Why did the tree fall over?
Because it's discriminant was less than zero.
:sexface:

Reply 117

Coeusful

Why did the cat fall off the roof? Because he lost his mu.

Reply 118

TheGrinningSkull

The integral of dee squared dee tee
From one to the cube root of three
Times half the cosine of the pi over nine
Is the log of the sixth root of e

:biggrin:

Memorised

Reply 119

Bethanyyy-

Lost an electron? You should really keep an ion them!