How should a girl ask a guy out?

Original post by nihonjin

they shouldnt

Reply 2

Juichiro

18

Original post by Anonymous

I'm 20 and a kissless virgin, never been in a relationship or had an ounce of male attention. So I guess I should be more proactive before 1-resigning to the fact that I'll likely never get a relationship

There's a lot of advice for guys asking girls out, but what about the other way around, without coming off as creepy/desperate (especially when said girl is quite unattractive)? And at what point do you ask someone out?

1- Bull****. Do you live in the forest or something? I would ask you out myself but not sure if you live in London. :tongue:

2- Don't worry about being "kissless" and"virgin". There is nothing wrong or bad about it. Enjoy life! :smile:

3- Confidence, confidence, confidence. It has been said many times. There is nothing sexier than a confident girl. Be yourself. Do as you want.

P.D. Do you live in London? :colondollar:

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 3

Juichiro

18

Original post by So Instinct

Boss.

I gave you some rep!

Reply 4

So Instinct

Personally I prefer a girl to be straight up and direct with me.
Go up to him, say you like him.

If your shy and can't be direct then just talk to him and build some comfort while flirting.

Reply 5

Panda Bear

17

Original post by nihonjin

they shouldnt

You just jumped out a time machine from the 18th century, right?

Reply 6

"Hi, [name]. I was wondering if you'd like to get a drink together some time? I think you're pretty cool and it'd be nice to get to know you a bit better."

You can omit the last sentence if you're feeling really shy.

Reply 7

lost_soul12

just go up to the next guy you see and like and kiss him, i'm sure he'll get the idea, and you've not really lost anything, well except maybe your dignity. your call.

Reply 8

Darkphilosopher

16

Original post by Juichiro

1- Bull****. Do you live in the forest or something? I would ask you out myself but not sure if you live in London. :tongue:

2- Don't worry about being "kissless" and"virgin". There is nothing wrong or bad about it. Enjoy life! :smile:

3- Confidence, confidence, confidence. It has been said many times. There is nothing sexier than a confident girl. Be yourself. Do as you want.

P.D. Do you live in London? :colondollar:

I prefer more reserved (aka, shy) girls. To each his own though.

Reply 9

So Instinct

Original post by Darkphilosopher

I prefer more reserved (aka, shy) girls. To each his own though.

I agree, I prefer a initial shy girl who gets 'wild' once comfortable. :ahee:

Reply 10

2ndClass

3

Just be casual about it. If you're in the same lecture/tutorial, sit next to him, chat about this and that. Do this for a couple of days so he'd get comfortable around you. If you think he's showing you interest back, just ask him if he'd like to get some lunch at the cafeteria or something. Let's "get a drink" is a cliche line imo. If he agrees, try to get to know each other and build platonic relationship. If you guys connect you could move things further.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

Thanks for the advice :smile:

I must mention that I'm a recluse who doesnt go to work or school and whose friends have drifted away or are away somewhere, so the only people I could be asking are strangers. I'm not sure how to get to know anyone beforehand

Reply 12

Original post by 2ndClass

Just be casual about it. If you're in the same lecture/tutorial, sit next to him, chat about this and that. Do this for a couple of days so he'd get comfortable around you. If you think he's showing you interest back, just ask him if he'd like to get some lunch at the cafeteria or something. Let's "get a drink" is a cliche line imo. If he agrees, try to get to know each other and build platonic relationship. If you guys connect you could move things further.

Quite a lot of my social life revolves around getting a drink with people. XD In my mind "let's get a drink" is kind of code of "let's have a relaxed social encounter". So whatever your code for "let's have a relaxed social encounter" is I guess.

Original post by Anonymous

Thanks for the advice :smile:

I must mention that I'm a recluse who doesnt go to work or school and whose friends have drifted away or are away somewhere, so the only people I could be asking are strangers. I'm not sure how to get to know anyone beforehand

That's a much bigger question IMO..."how do I build a social life for myself". Because most relationships - proper relationships not hook ups - will start off as friendships.

And I'm not sure, if I'm honest. The best advice I can give is to start going to local exercise classes or to find somewhere where you can interact with other people who might have similar interests to you in a way that isn't too stymied. Depending on your interests it could be a bridge club, a philosophy in pubs group, and my brother goes to a tabletop gaming thing that he enjoys.

And then, once you've met a few interesting people, make an active effort to invite them round to yours for a sociable drink (see what I mean about that being code? :P) or out to the cinema or something. If you're isolated - as I am because I homeschool - it's much much harder because people aren't constantly reminded of your presence by interacting with you on a daily basis, so you need to text or call every week or fortnight or so simply so they don't forget you.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by wildbluesun

...

God, that sounds complicated, but I'll give it a go, can't think of any activity right now but there must be something I'm interested in. Thanks :smile:

Reply 14

Original post by Anonymous

God, that sounds complicated, but I'll give it a go, can't think of any activity right now but there must be something I'm interested in. Thanks :smile:

It totally is. When I'd just started homeschooling I was 15, fresh out of a long hospital stay, didn't have a friend in the world. Luckily for me I was still in touch (via Facebook) with acquaintances from school and managed to form friendships with them. It took forever and it was really stressful and difficult, but it's worth now that I have a great group of friends who I know really like me and enjoy spending time with me. And I met my fantastic partner through them.

Good luck. It's hard but worth it. :smile:

Reply 15

cambio wechsel

"Do you like drinking? Because I've got a 20 year old port I'm ready to open..."

Casual, like.

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by wildbluesun

It totally is. When I'd just started homeschooling I was 15, fresh out of a long hospital stay, didn't have a friend in the world. Luckily for me I was still in touch (via Facebook) with acquaintances from school and managed to form friendships with them. It took forever and it was really stressful and difficult, but it's worth now that I have a great group of friends who I know really like me and enjoy spending time with me. And I met my fantastic partner through them.

Good luck. It's hard but worth it. :smile:

Thanks. I don't have connections to start me off, but I'll join some sort of club and see how that goes

Original post by cambio wechsel

"Do you like drinking? Because I've got a 20 year old port I'm ready to open..."

Casual, like.

I don't drink

Reply 17

py0alb

3

I was going to say "go for a drink with him" because thats how every relationship I've ever had, from 1 nighters to 3 years, started: two people sitting in the pub, chatting over a friendly drink.

But if you don't drink I'm completely stumped. Start drinking?

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 18