How can I make my personality more attractive ( Girls specifically would help )
For quite some time now Ive realized im unattractive . Numerous bullies who want to make themselves feel better have told me so , "freinds" have brought it up in heated arguments , ive heard girls I like say hes a nice guy but hes ****ing ugly .
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp
)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age.
My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp
)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age. My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
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Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age.
Actually, I disagree. That's all I really look for in a partner, quite frankly. (Providing that she at least looks okay.)
Try to understand yourself a bit more - if there's something a little less common than usual hobbies that you like, then focus on that.
And remember that most people haven't had a relationship by the time they're 17, so you're hardly in a small minority.
You can now get a Personality Transplant in North Korea if you have £20,000 to spare. Theres a long waiting list and not many donors though
Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
For quite some time now Ive realized im unattractive . Numerous bullies who want to make themselves feel better have told me so , "freinds" have brought it up in heated arguments , ive heard girls I like say hes a nice guy but hes ****ing ugly .
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age.
My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp
)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age. My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
Learn to flirt. Practice on randoms.
Get a few interesting hobbies. Don't give me that "I dont have time due to college" **** - I work a job that regularly takes up 70 - 80 hours a week and I have a tonne of hobbies.
Become funnier.
Spend as much time as you can in social situations outside your comfort zone - this will really improve your awkwardness.
Go to the gym and learn how to lift weights. This might seem pointless but almost everyone who does it finds it not only makes them more physically attractive but it is a massive confidence boost. That extra testosterone wont hurt either.
Don't worry about not being particularly attractive - for a guy it barely matters if you get your other **** sorted.
If you dont already, learn to enjoy alcohol in moderation and going to pubs etc.
When you leave college take a gap year and go travelling SOLO and stay in hostels and force yourself to meet people every day. This alone will make you a far far far more interesting and charismatic person. I can't recommend this step enough!
(edited 11 years ago)
If you can love yourself and be confident with who you are, then I can't help but love you too
Since you're so opinionated, perhaps you could join a debate team? A few people in my class are a member and they all have a great time together, especially when they're going to competitions and such.
In your case, this does sound like a really useful thing to do! (:
Plus, I think it will be a load of fun to do!
HistoryRepeating
When you leave college take a gap year and go travelling SOLO and stay in hostels and force yourself to meet people every day. This alone will make you a far far far more interesting and charismatic person. I can't recommend this step enough!
Plus, I think it will be a load of fun to do!
Original post by HistoryRepeating
Learn to flirt. Practice on randoms.
Get a few interesting hobbies. Don't give me that "I dont have time due to college" **** - I work a job that regularly takes up 70 - 80 hours a week and I have a tonne of hobbies.
Become funnier.
Spend as much time as you can in social situations outside your comfort zone - this will really improve your awkwardness.
Go to the gym and learn how to lift weights. This might seem pointless but almost everyone who does it finds it not only makes them more physically attractive but it is a massive confidence boost. That extra testosterone wont hurt either.
Don't worry about not being particularly attractive - for a guy it barely matters if you get your other **** sorted.
If you dont already, learn to enjoy alcohol in moderation and going to pubs etc.
When you leave college take a gap year and go travelling SOLO and stay in hostels and force yourself to meet people every day. This alone will make you a far far far more interesting and charismatic person. I can't recommend this step enough!
Get a few interesting hobbies. Don't give me that "I dont have time due to college" **** - I work a job that regularly takes up 70 - 80 hours a week and I have a tonne of hobbies.
Become funnier.
Spend as much time as you can in social situations outside your comfort zone - this will really improve your awkwardness.
Go to the gym and learn how to lift weights. This might seem pointless but almost everyone who does it finds it not only makes them more physically attractive but it is a massive confidence boost. That extra testosterone wont hurt either.
Don't worry about not being particularly attractive - for a guy it barely matters if you get your other **** sorted.
If you dont already, learn to enjoy alcohol in moderation and going to pubs etc.
When you leave college take a gap year and go travelling SOLO and stay in hostels and force yourself to meet people every day. This alone will make you a far far far more interesting and charismatic person. I can't recommend this step enough!
Thanks for the advice bro , would you mind listing a few of your hobbies , just out of interest ?
When I said i barely have any time I mean it , I mean I have like 4 hours after college each day , bare in mind I have work to do and I have to have dinner , I intend to stay on top of my work .. Sigh I guess il have to make sacrifices somewhere
That last step definitely sounds like something Id be interested in , last summer I did "The Challenge " which meant staying in a residential for 2 weeks with people Ive never known , it was one of the best experiences of my life and I learned so much about myself.
Ask open ended questions. That means avoid yes/no questions where possible, if you didn't know. For example, what they did at the weekend, what they think of something etc. You could talk about the books you read if that interests you and them. Keep up with current events and trends. Try to have a general knowledge of as many different things as possible. The more you know, the more you can say. Hope that helps.
Side note - what kind of girls are you trying to attract? Not all girls like the same things.
Side note - what kind of girls are you trying to attract? Not all girls like the same things.
Original post by goldenkuri
If you can love yourself and be confident with who you are, then I can't help but love you too
Ohh if only it was this easy
maybe in later life ...Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
For quite some time now Ive realized im unattractive . Numerous bullies who want to make themselves feel better have told me so , "freinds" have brought it up in heated arguments , ive heard girls I like say hes a nice guy but hes ****ing ugly .
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age.
My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
I wouldn't say I have low self esteem because I understand that its unlikely im ever going to become any more attractive than I am , so I might as well work with what the gene pool has given me . I'm quite self confident .
Im 17 and ive done growing . Like most people out there I want someone to have unconditional love for me , even if it is just because I have an awesome personality.
I wouldn't say im shy , as im not necessarily afraid to speak to a girl I like but perhaps socially inept as if im alone with a person I do sometimes struggle to think what to say , and over think alot . I tend to bring up generic topics to girls in my college such as what do you plan to do after college , do you like the class etc but end up going nowhere in the conversation.
I think perhaps if I was more of an interesting person I might be more attractive , I wouldn't really say I have hobbies . I stopped playing games in high school , in my spare time I read , revise , watch films , watch long running series etc but I dont do anything like sports ( i have really weak co ordination , so I fail at pretty much all sports ) . I have no hobbies and I understand why that would make me quite a boring person , but as im a full time college student and only previously became unemployed (x mas temp
)its difficult to find time to relax let alone put my energies into a hobbie . I am quite an opinonated , intelligent young fellow but I dont think thats really appealing in this day and age. My question to you is , what kind of personality do you kind attractive ? and what could I do to make mine more so ?
Read my thread, and you'll be sorted.
Original post by blubimnotafish
Since you're so opinionated, perhaps you could join a debate team? A few people in my class are a member and they all have a great time together, especially when they're going to competitions and such.
In your case, this does sound like a really useful thing to do! (:
Plus, I think it will be a load of fun to do!
In your case, this does sound like a really useful thing to do! (:
Plus, I think it will be a load of fun to do!
A debate team does sound like something Id be interested in ... and im sure there is one at my college , I might have to force myself to attend it one of these days.
Original post by AstroMan
Ask open ended questions. That means avoid yes/no questions where possible, if you didn't know. For example, what they did at the weekend, what they think of something etc. You could talk about the books you read if that interests you and them. Keep up with current events and trends. Try to have a general knowledge of as many different things as possible. The more you know, the more you can say. Hope that helps.
Side note - what kind of girls are you trying to attract? Not all girls like the same things.
Side note - what kind of girls are you trying to attract? Not all girls like the same things.
Well the girls I know the girls I like wouldnt really be into reading fantasy and watching gangster epics . They are kind of the mainstream type of girl right now , I mean they are quite intelligent but at the same time they like to dumb themselves down as its so much the norm im finding it hard to describe them
Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
A debate team does sound like something Id be interested in ... and im sure there is one at my college , I might have to force myself to attend it one of these days.
Original post by Closeout
Read my thread, and you'll be sorted.
Thanks for the advice dude , but being freindzoned isnt my problem . Im not prepared to change who I am just to win over a girl because thats destined to fail , I want a girl to love me for who I am not what I would have to become to win her over.
Lojust widen your social circle focuc on your career aspects look into university maybe? That will give you more life experience and help you biul*develop more personality
one of my friends is in a similar situation. he wants a girl to like him for who he is and is unwilling to change the way he goes about it. the point is, you must experiment. if you know what you have to do to get a girl, do it for the experience and worry about how it fits in with your outlook later. in relationships, self-esteem is currency, and you aren't ready for a relationship if you dont have the tools to make it work (ie sufficient self-esteem). often times people who always want the girlfriend aren't emotionally ready to let it happen
Lol, I read the title and recognised the name and I was like oh look who's asking for help. I thought you already wrote a list of what to do in order to be like what girls want?
Oh I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't reply or I'd be giving you the impression that I've been thinking endlessly about you. Ah no but I'm only in denial, you're right~ I think I've really fallen for you! /sarcasm :P Okay I'll stop /trying/ to be mean now. Ah to bite my tongue.
Maybe you're looking at the wrong type of girl, as you said you've overheard girls that you like saying "he's a nice guy but he's ****ing ugly". Do you really want a girl who is like that? Also, I think everybody's "type" is quite broad. Sometimes we find ourselves falling for someone we wouldn't have thought was our "type" but then your "type" suddenly becomes who they are, you know?
As you say, you think it's because you're lacking hobbies? Well then one option is to get some new hobbies whilst at the same time say if you were to join some sort of club, you would also be able to meet new people who may share the same interest as you?
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
Oh I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't reply or I'd be giving you the impression that I've been thinking endlessly about you. Ah no but I'm only in denial, you're right~ I think I've really fallen for you! /sarcasm :P Okay I'll stop /trying/ to be mean now. Ah to bite my tongue.
Maybe you're looking at the wrong type of girl, as you said you've overheard girls that you like saying "he's a nice guy but he's ****ing ugly". Do you really want a girl who is like that? Also, I think everybody's "type" is quite broad. Sometimes we find ourselves falling for someone we wouldn't have thought was our "type" but then your "type" suddenly becomes who they are, you know?
As you say, you think it's because you're lacking hobbies? Well then one option is to get some new hobbies whilst at the same time say if you were to join some sort of club, you would also be able to meet new people who may share the same interest as you?
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
Original post by SyOnGuitar
Lol, I read the title and recognised the name and I was like oh look who's asking for help. I thought you already wrote a list of what to do in order to be like what girls want?
Oh I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't reply or I'd be giving you the impression that I've been thinking endlessly about you. Ah no but I'm only in denial, you're right~ I think I've really fallen for you! /sarcasm :P Okay I'll stop /trying/ to be mean now. Ah to bite my tongue.
Maybe you're looking at the wrong type of girl, as you said you've overheard girls that you like saying "he's a nice guy but he's ****ing ugly". Do you really want a girl who is like that? Also, I think everybody's "type" is quite broad. Sometimes we find ourselves falling for someone we wouldn't have thought was our "type" but then your "type" suddenly becomes who they are, you know?
As you say, you think it's because you're lacking hobbies? Well then one option is to get some new hobbies whilst at the same time say if you were to join some sort of club, you would also be able to meet new people who may share the same interest as you?
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
Oh I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't reply or I'd be giving you the impression that I've been thinking endlessly about you. Ah no but I'm only in denial, you're right~ I think I've really fallen for you! /sarcasm :P Okay I'll stop /trying/ to be mean now. Ah to bite my tongue.
Maybe you're looking at the wrong type of girl, as you said you've overheard girls that you like saying "he's a nice guy but he's ****ing ugly". Do you really want a girl who is like that? Also, I think everybody's "type" is quite broad. Sometimes we find ourselves falling for someone we wouldn't have thought was our "type" but then your "type" suddenly becomes who they are, you know?
As you say, you think it's because you're lacking hobbies? Well then one option is to get some new hobbies whilst at the same time say if you were to join some sort of club, you would also be able to meet new people who may share the same interest as you?
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
Ohh **** no you just had to come torment me didnt you
I bet you got a right blast when you found me talking about my insecurities ...Original post by SyOnGuitar
Lol, I read the title and recognised the name and I was like oh look who's asking for help. I thought you already wrote a list of what to do in order to be like what girls want?
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
I cannot help you in terms of telling you what kind of personality I like, as I only have bad things to say to you in that case and nothing helpful, so that is all I shall say for now.
The truth is I was playing you
im really have no clue when it comes to women and was attempting to act like a douche with you ( which generally works ) but my problem is im not prepared to become the bad guy ...Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
Ohh **** no you just had to come torment me didnt you I bet you got a right blast when you found me talking about my insecurities ...
I bet you got a right blast when you found me talking about my insecurities ...Well you're wrong, I'm not that kind of person, hence why I actually tried to help :P
Original post by Jaegon Targaryen
The truth is I was playing you im really have no clue when it comes to women and was attempting to act like a douche with you ( which generally works ) but my problem is im not prepared to become the bad guy ...
im really have no clue when it comes to women and was attempting to act like a douche with you ( which generally works ) but my problem is im not prepared to become the bad guy ...Well you were hardly playing me. And to be honest, I think the list you made up and your attempt yesterday was clear enough to me that you really did have no clue when it comes to women.
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