Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

People getting involved in my relationships?

So, I had a bad time with my ex. It wasn't healthy, and we went through a period of breaking-up and getting back together. Whilst broken up, I slept with someone else. I regret it anyway, totally out of character, but whatever, experiences shape you and all that blah. One of his female friends (well, less of a friend, a housemates girlfriend who came to visit occasionally) started calling me a slut and slag on Facebook, and telling my ex boyfriend that he should never get back with me. I wouldn't have blamed him, but we gave it one more shot. It was too difficult for him to get over, and for the sake of our sanity, I broke it up for good. The girl continued to send me abusive messages over Facebook, so I asked her to back off and focus on her own relationship. This is a girl who admits to her boyfriend hitting her and cheating on her. She has also cheated on him.

This was well over six months ago. I now have a new boyfriend who seems to be the perfect match :smile:

I've never been happier. But as soon as we became 'facebook official' she started sending messages through her boyfriends account to my current beau.

She tried telling him I was a slut, that I made nasty comments about their relationship, that I mess guys around, and that I was insulting to her. The only comment I ever made about her character was that she deserved better, and it just upset me that she had been so two-faced to me.

Luckily, my boyfriend is aware of everything, and understands who she is. Two weeks later, after a night out, we woke up to find messages in his account telling him I'd been contacting my ex, and trying to get back with him. This is all total BS! I would never ruin what I have. This took a lot longer to convince my boyfriend about, but luckily he believed me.

This girl has now taken to posting on Facebook and twitter about me, stirring up rumors that aren't even true.

What can I do? I'm trying my best to keep my head high, but when someone is continually making vile comments on the internet about you, it's hard to move on with your life. I don't even understand why she hates me so much, I'm no longer with my ex, so why is my life bothering her so much now?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Congratulations if you made it to the end! :smile:

Reply 2

coffeepirate

"People who can, do. People who can't, criticize."

She is obviously in a very messed up place in her life right now, and for whatever reason, has chosen to feed off of the happiest person in close vicinity. You and your boyfriend know what's going on and you know the truth; that's all that matters. Block her from Twitter and Facebook, and continue to move on with your life.

I know it seems hard now, but unfortunately the only way she'll back off is if she knows you're no longer bothered by it.

(Not sure what the neg was for?)

(edited 10 years ago)

^^ Seconded.

This is harassment, you have evidence, she sounds like a psycho, report her to the authorities, I hate people who take it on themselves to spread complete lies, hence I would like them dealt with in one way or another. Smear campaigns can have a very bad effect on the targets life. On an issue like this for me it is either a stern word then intimidation or use the law, the latter is obviously the best option otherwise it'd be me in trouble.

Original post by coffeepirate

I know it seems hard now, but unfortunately the only way she'll back off is if she knows you're no longer bothered by it.

She might back off if she thinks she'll get a criminal conviction also.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 5

username1155925

I had a similar sort of thing, my whole year at school spread rumours about me cheating on my current boyfriend with my ex because a few of my ex's friends were pissed off. It was horrible, it tore me apart and made my boyfriend paranoid. Even my own "friends" were spreading rumours.
I know that isn't really the same as your situation, but anyway the best thing for you and your boyfriend to do is to try and ignore them, block the girl on facebook, and just get on with your own relationship. The last thing she wants to see is that you're having a good relationship!
Remember to support each other, and you'll get through it. The stuff I just mentioned happened over 2 years ago and we're still in a happy relationship :smile:

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 6

lizlaz350

You and your boyfriend should block both her and her boyfriend on facebook/twitter/whatever other sites she's contacting you on.

And potentially warn her that you've saved her messages and will take them to the police if this harrassing behaviour continues.