Is it ok to be at all negative when chatting to girls you don't know well?

I mean not about the girl your chatting to but just about general stuff, i.e. anything negative in your life, people or something you don't get on with. Not really on a downer throughout or real bitchy about someone. It's just when chatting to girls I only just met or don't know that well I get the impression that bringing up anything much negative is I fear a not to do. So the conversation always seems a bit too much on the positive, perhaps not fake but maybe slightly cheesy but mostly not real, not reflective of me, not reality, just a sanitized conversation whereas perhaps it would be better to be more real if slightly negatative elements if you know what I mean?

Reply 1

username927016

20

Original post by Anonymous

I mean not about the girl your chatting to but just about general stuff, i.e. anything negative in your life, people or something you don't get on with. Not really on a downer throughout or real bitchy about someone. It's just when chatting to girls I only just met or don't know that well I get the impression that bringing up anything much negative is I fear a not to do. So the conversation always seems a bit too much on the positive, perhaps not fake but maybe slightly cheesy but mostly not real, not reflective of me, not reality, just a sanitized conversation whereas perhaps it would be better to be more real if slightly negatative elements if you know what I mean?

I don't think it's a good idea really, I'd say only do it to get out of lying. Giving off negative vibes isn't good as it puts a downer on things. I think it's important not to end up saying things that you don't need to say as well, judge the circumstances & try to focus on only chatting about non-negative things :tongue:

Reply 2

Zarek

21

Original post by Anonymous

I mean not about the girl your chatting to but just about general stuff, i.e. anything negative in your life, people or something you don't get on with. Not really on a downer throughout or real bitchy about someone. It's just when chatting to girls I only just met or don't know that well I get the impression that bringing up anything much negative is I fear a not to do. So the conversation always seems a bit too much on the positive, perhaps not fake but maybe slightly cheesy but mostly not real, not reflective of me, not reality, just a sanitized conversation whereas perhaps it would be better to be more real if slightly negatative elements if you know what I mean?

Generally it stinks to be negative. Who wants to go out with someone negative. Only exception is self depreciating humour which, if well done, can be fun and positive. If in doubt either shut up or be positive..

Reply 3

Protégé

11

I wouldn't call myself negative but I do generally come off as cynical and I've been alright with most people. Just say what you feel like saying, don't alter your speech because you're scared of what she thinks.