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How can I stop blaming myself :(

I've never posted on anything like this before, but I've found this site so helpful this past week.

Basically my boyfriend of 3 and a half years ended things last Monday and this week has been absolutely horrible. It had been a relationship of many ups and downs. After 2 years he ended things as I was going travelling, as soon as I got back we started things back straight away.

It was kind of like we had two honey moon periods and these times were just amazing. We got on so well, he made me feel so special and I felt so happy.

However as the months went on he started to change, he stopped saying and doing nice things and became very cold. I was told before hand that he was emotionally unavailable and warned by friends - I chose to ignore this as I side I saw was completely different.

He recently got offered his dream job in a new city and i left my job and moved with him. I always put him first and wanted him to be happy.
A month later he decided to end things with me, it had been a really hard month for me and the fact I was unemployed had put a huge strain on our relationship. He said he knew he was unhappy for months but thought things would change when we lived together.....

The last 6 months had been hard, the fact he didn't show he cared for me and said that I should know he loves me without him having to show me, made me very insecure. When I cried he didn't care, he spoke to me so badly and always made things my fault.

Now that we have broken up all I can do is blame myself for being insecure and needy - I just wanted to feel special and wanted. I didn't think that was too much to ask.

He was always more interested in watching TV shows and playing games on his phone than he ever was in showing any love towards me. He admitted he had communication problems - whenever I wanted to talk about something bothering me it would turn into an argument and everything would be my fault