Help! I am pregnant from a casual fling
Hi all
Was seeing a guy for just over a month, it was a casual situation and I have recently found out that I am pregnant.
We are both clean, so in the beginning we used the withdrawal method and then I went on the pill. He decided to end things last week due to his own issues. At this point my period was late, I called him last Sunday and wanted to let him know, but I was scared and decided to talk about his issues instead.
Now I know for sure, is there any point of me telling him, since we no longer communicate? I don't want to look like I want him back or come across needy.
I know he has no interest in being with me, let alone having a child with me.
I'm just confused.
Was seeing a guy for just over a month, it was a casual situation and I have recently found out that I am pregnant.
We are both clean, so in the beginning we used the withdrawal method and then I went on the pill. He decided to end things last week due to his own issues. At this point my period was late, I called him last Sunday and wanted to let him know, but I was scared and decided to talk about his issues instead.
Now I know for sure, is there any point of me telling him, since we no longer communicate? I don't want to look like I want him back or come across needy.
I know he has no interest in being with me, let alone having a child with me.
I'm just confused.
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I think he deserves to know at least, what you do is down to the both of you.
If you're planning on keeping it then yeah, he definitely deserves to know. However if you're planning to get rid of it (which I'd highly suggest like oh dear god dont ruin your life with a child) then there isn't really much point mentioning it to him if you're no longer involved
Original post by ladyserendipity
If you're planning on keeping it then yeah, he definitely deserves to know. However if you're planning to get rid of it (which I'd highly suggest like oh dear god dont ruin your life with a child) then there isn't really much point mentioning it to him if you're no longer involved
Agreed
Tell the bloke
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Original post by ladyserendipity
If you're planning on keeping it then yeah, he definitely deserves to know. However if you're planning to get rid of it (which I'd highly suggest like oh dear god dont ruin your life with a child) then there isn't really much point mentioning it to him if you're no longer involved
Your blasé attitudes towards abortion is pretty disturbing.
Think carefully about the route to your answer. If you keep the child then not only does he have the right to know but he will also be responsible for its upbringing. If on the other hand you decide you do not want to keep the baby then you must take advice on the best option for you - termination is not the only answer and taking this option could stay with you for the rest of your life.
I would pop and see a counsellor, they will have heard your problem before, will not be judgemental and will put your choices to you in a way you can understand.
What ever your choice - good luck to you for the future.
I would pop and see a counsellor, they will have heard your problem before, will not be judgemental and will put your choices to you in a way you can understand.
What ever your choice - good luck to you for the future.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
Your blasé attitudes towards abortion is pretty disturbing.
Completely agree. Whether OP is still involved with the guy is irrelevant. They both created the child, and he deserves to know, under what ever circumstances.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
Your blasé attitudes towards abortion is pretty disturbing.
Not really, it's a viable option in her situation
Original post by Anonymous
Hi all
Was seeing a guy for just over a month, it was a casual situation and I have recently found out that I am pregnant.
We are both clean, so in the beginning we used the withdrawal method and then I went on the pill. He decided to end things last week due to his own issues. At this point my period was late, I called him last Sunday and wanted to let him know, but I was scared and decided to talk about his issues instead.
Now I know for sure, is there any point of me telling him, since we no longer communicate? I don't want to look like I want him back or come across needy.
I know he has no interest in being with me, let alone having a child with me.
I'm just confused.
Was seeing a guy for just over a month, it was a casual situation and I have recently found out that I am pregnant.
We are both clean, so in the beginning we used the withdrawal method and then I went on the pill. He decided to end things last week due to his own issues. At this point my period was late, I called him last Sunday and wanted to let him know, but I was scared and decided to talk about his issues instead.
Now I know for sure, is there any point of me telling him, since we no longer communicate? I don't want to look like I want him back or come across needy.
I know he has no interest in being with me, let alone having a child with me.
I'm just confused.
I suggest keeping the baby and letting him know about the situation.
Original post by ladyserendipity
If you're planning on keeping it then yeah, he definitely deserves to know. However if you're planning to get rid of it (which I'd highly suggest like oh dear god dont ruin your life with a child) then there isn't really much point mentioning it to him if you're no longer involved
This. First figure out if you want to keep it or not. If you know you want to keep it then of course he needs to know about the fact he is going to have a child. If you don't want to keep it, then you don't need to tell him if you don't want to.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
Your blasé attitudes towards abortion is pretty disturbing.
Yes indeed. How very disturbing to suggest a legal, safe, easy procedure when dealing with situation with which the person in question doesn't want to and probably can't deal with in a mature, clever fashion.
Just have the little guy hoovered out and move on
Original post by ladyserendipity
If you're planning on keeping it then yeah, he definitely deserves to know. However if you're planning to get rid of it (which I'd highly suggest like oh dear god dont ruin your life with a child) then there isn't really much point mentioning it to him if you're no longer involved
Yeah I definitely do not want to keep it. What if I can not cope after the abortion and need someone to talk to? I do not want to tell me family or friends.
well I would inform him, but I would also decide what I was going to do
Original post by Anonymous
We are both clean, so in the beginning we used the withdrawal method
Gawd.
Poor judgment on your part.
It is imperative that you tell him and make this decision together. Firstly because it would be incredibly dishonorable on your part to keep this from him and secondly because despite people telling you its your body and decision ECT.. If I found out that somebody had aborted my heir, I would truly hate them for that and if your friends that's not something you want.
It is imperative that you tell him and make this decision together. Firstly because it would be incredibly dishonorable on your part to keep this from him and secondly because despite people telling you its your body and decision ECT.. If I found out that somebody had aborted my heir, I would truly hate them for that and if your friends that's not something you want.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
Your blasé attitudes towards abortion is pretty disturbing.
No it isn't.
Original post by Josb
Gawd.
They literally taught me that was stupid before I learnt what sex was. As in,
"Today in sex education we're going to learn about a thing called contraception. And no, just pulling out isn't good enough. Oh I see we have a question, yes"
"Pull out of where?"
Original post by Rakas21
Poor judgment on your part.
It is imperative that you tell him and make this decision together. Firstly because it would be incredibly dishonorable on your part to keep this from him and secondly because despite people telling you its your body and decision ECT.. If I found out that somebody had aborted my heir, I would truly hate them for that and if your friends that's not something you want.
It is imperative that you tell him and make this decision together. Firstly because it would be incredibly dishonorable on your part to keep this from him and secondly because despite people telling you its your body and decision ECT.. If I found out that somebody had aborted my heir, I would truly hate them for that and if your friends that's not something you want.
It may not be fair but in all honesty, if she's decided to have an abortion, the father has no control over her decision whatsoever so..she doesn't have to tell him
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