I was spoilt as a child and I think I am borderline narscist

I had what most people would call a comfortable upbringing, I was considered good looking through school / collage / uni. Was never bullied or had to face consequences for being rude.

In turn, I’m my mid 20s now I feel I lack empathy and act selfish. Unlike a narcissist I feel bad afterwards but can’t seem to control my mouth before saying anything horrible. I am always on the defence and feel I have to be the best one in every room (looks/education/relationships etc etc)

I am sick of being like this, can anyone help me get out of this???

Reply 1

Lugerase

5

Well at least you know that you're not acting nicely so you have done the first and the biggest step
You can et will change if you put effort to it
Personnaly the thing that helped me was philosophy like reading books about different subjects and I think the more you learn about the world and people through those books the more you see that you are like everyone

I'm not a big help and my english is clearly not fluent enough

Anyway good luck mate you will be the person you want to be

Reply 2

64Lightbulbs

19

see a therapist, maybe mention being tested for npd (narcissistic personality disorder) or just ask for help w/ working through these sorts of issues. Bad people don't care about becoming better, so don't feel too bad in the meantime. :smile:

troll?

OP

Original post by Lugerase

Well at least you know that you're not acting nicely so you have done the first and the biggest step
You can et will change if you put effort to it
Personnaly the thing that helped me was philosophy like reading books about different subjects and I think the more you learn about the world and people through those books the more you see that you are like everyone

I'm not a big help and my english is clearly not fluent enough

Anyway good luck mate you will be the person you want to be

Thanks, lately I have started reading a lot more than my usual to understand myself better. Z library has been so helpful. do you recommend any particular books?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by 64Lightbulbs

see a therapist, maybe mention being tested for npd (narcissistic personality disorder) or just ask for help w/ working through these sorts of issues. Bad people don't care about becoming better, so don't feel too bad in the meantime. :smile:

I have started a programme through IAPT last week, it’s got to the stage that I feel depressed yet I can’t seem to control my actions. They have put me on a 12 week online program to help. But I wonder if there is a quick way to practice/develop empathy.

I have lived in my bubble all my life having certain self validation, now that I know I am the one that has an issue. I feel like my world has come crumbling down. I am girl btw which makes it harder.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by mspaghetti

troll?

Certainly not. I am posting anonymously as I feel embarrassed and don’t want any of my friends to see it on here.

Reply 7

Lugerase

5

Original post by Anonymous

Thanks, lately I have started reading a lot more than my usual to understand myself better. Z library has been so helpful. do you recommend any particular books?

I can recommend you some like Nietzche, Rousseau, Épicure, Marcus Aurélius (this one helped me a lot especialy "thoughts to myself")
Btw I forgot to mention it but if you didn't start yet you should try to workout a bit in a club I never met bad person in gym or sports club so they might influence you in a good way :smile:

I hope you had a nice day mate

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Lugerase

I can recommend you some like Nietzche, Rousseau, Épicure, Marcus Aurélius (this one helped me a lot especialy "thoughts to myself")
Btw I forgot to mention it but if you didn't start yet you should try to workout a bit in a club I never met bad person in gym or sports club so they might influence you in a good way :smile:

I hope you had a nice day mate

Thank you. I’ve been meaning to join a dance class for a long time, might look into that.

I hope you had a nice day too )

Reply 9

Lugerase

5

Original post by Anonymous

Thank you. I’ve been meaning to join a dance class for a long time, might look into that.

I hope you had a nice day too )

That's great man you should try to talk with people at your dance class and if they confortable enough ask them about their life and experience. You will see the world a bit differently