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Should I marry him? Please can I have some advice?

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

(edited 7 years ago)

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Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

he seems nice by the looks of it

i think you should accept the proposal :smile:

and plus, your mum wants you to
and mums know best :smile:

Reply 3

sjohnson98

You're 19 and you're asking teenagers whether to get married. That alone suggests that you're not quite ready.

Reply 4

sell my secrets

Original post by mariam687

he seems nice by the looks of it

i think you should accept the proposal :smile:

and plus, your mum wants you to
and mums know best :smile:

Even if you do decide to marry him, definitely do not do it on the back of this advice.

Reply 5

ThatGurl

Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

this sounds so cute :smile:

but i'm a bit iffy i mean what do you rly know about this dude? you said yourself he's mysterious etc

Reply 6

ameliablc

You obviously have a lovely relationship and history together, and your friends and family know best. From my point of view, 19 is still quite young to accept a proposal, but if you think it's best and it's sensible and you know him really well then go for it :smile:

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

yh why not
People will complain about your age or the age difference then why not
Seems like a genuine guy who will look after u :smile:

Reply 8

raspberr1es

Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

nah not yet - if you like him, tell him you'd like to continue seeing him though

Reply 9

soIiIoquy

Original post by sell my secrets

Even if you do decide to marry him, definitely do not do it on the back of this advice.

wooow lol, why are you quoting me? quote OP..

Reply 10

Davide_online

You must make your own decision, You are an adult now.

My advice is that in the UK 19 is far too young to marry and that your parents are, sadly, not offering you the best advice in saying his wealth should lead you to marry this man.

Reply 11

username2371841

for me 10 years is scary age gap

he seems caring but was there any attraction? ik you said you werent in a relationship but did it feel like that?

the fact he's offered to pay for lessons and kissed you when you were 17 and he was like 27 it kinda odd and creepy

is he a family friend or just some random guy?

i think not, it a quick decision and youre so young :frown:

Reply 12

DeadEnd_96

Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

Do you feel ready to get married?

Reply 13

Joep95

Don't be an idiot the fact that you are posting on here asking is proof you shouldn't.

If you do I would bet heavily on it ending badly or at least being a unhappy marriage.

Reply 14

username47781

Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

The fact you are asking sounds like you have one or two doubts, I would wait a bit yet. Live life a bit more first.

Reply 15

Thomb

Original post by harlowberry

This is long but I really need some help.I'm 19 years old and the man who has asked me to marry him is 29. I have 3 sisters (I'm second youngest) and we come from a wealthy(ish) family. My dad was a lawyer who was wealthy whereas my mum's a school teacher. When I was 16 years old my parents threw a dinner party and their friend brought his son(he was 26 at the time)and they're also a wealthy family. The son is very tall and good-looking but he's very mysterious which makes him quite attractive.We'd just have small talk.6 months after this my dad passed away.I had no one to talk to until I went to my dad's funeral where I saw the son again. He talked to me and made sure that I was okay and he tried to cheer me up,reassure me and take me on walks. My mum could see this,so she invited him and his family over weekly for dinner.I'm a ballet dancer and as most of the money came from our dad, by the time I was 17 we couldn't pay for my classes.He offered to pay them for me (I said no) but he just gave my family the money.We always used to talk by the rose bush in my garden and then one day he kissed me.We never dated;he'd always protect me and look after me.sometimes when I see him I get scared he'll take advantage of me-he wouldn't, but he's so secretive.3 days ago at dinner,he proposed to me.I just said"give me time to think."Mum keeps on pestering me to say yes and my friends too! They think I should marry him (because he's rich) but I don't want to marry because of that!Do you think I should marry him based on what I've told you?Thank you

Is this some kind of wind up? :biggrin:

Reply 16

Namita Gurung

People change in life and you still haven't gone through the phase of early adulthood yet. Without a doubt, during your early 20s your views will change. So I'm saying wait a little longer. If he loves you, he'll be more than happy to wait.
Also what about education? If you're in uni or going to uni, you'll be focusing all your attention in studying. Marriage isn't really all that necessary anyway since you can get married once you're definitely certain. Posting here by asking if you should marry him or not shows you're not fully sure. But again it's your choice and you know your relationship and him better than the people here. Good luck for whichever choice you make!