I have an extremely strict muslim family - but I don't believe in Islam.

Scroll to see replies

Absolute idiot... If you read the Quran you would know its a corrupt book designed to turn the population into slaves for

Reply 201

Thestrugg

OP doesnt believe in Islam because they studied Islam and realised that its not true. Just a violent and controlling book.

Reply 202

SlightlySummer

Original post by Thestrugg

Absolute idiot... If you read the Quran you would know its a corrupt book designed to turn the population into slaves for

And maybe you should’ve read when OP posted this thread

Reply 203

Annoynomse

Wow it has been 10 years ago , i wonder what happened to your life

Reply 204

cccartier

Original post by Anonymous

sorry for the long post, really have got a lot on my plate.

My family are extremely strict muslims, completely hardcore. Some of their beliefs are jsut so completely wrong and immoral in my opinion (i'm not saying that islam is wrong or immoral - I don't believe that these particular beliefs have any place in the religion). But i go through everyday of my life pretending i believe the same things, because if i didn't i'd be kicked out and disowned, or beaten or whatever - i have no idea, i just no it would be extremely extremely bad, there's no way they'd ever accept it.

But i don't have the means to leave home and support myself and more importantly, i don't have the courage to do it. I'm starting uni in october, and my parents are working so hard to help finance it since we're not very wealthy. But i don't want them to - i don't want to owe them anything more, i feel so bad about wanting to leave. But they've completely and absolutely controlled my life. I've never had a social life much because i've never been allowed out with friends, I've had to lie jsut to go to the cinema, or even to the park. Most of the friends i do have are distant, and i don't blame them, if i'm never around then i can hardly be a good friend. They don't understand that i can't help it, and that as pathetic as it sounds, they're the only friends i really have.

My muslim friends would completely reject me too - i'd be hated by most of them. I feel like i'm completely stuck leading this life, and i'm so damn miserable. I can't even ask any girls i like out, the most social interaction i've had on my gap year is through facebook, and my parents are constantly screaming and shouting at me, having a complete go at me. They treat me like i'm 5 years old, completely controlling my life, and yet have a go at me for not being mature etc

They've always fought too, and I mean physically as well, which ahs resulted in me completely hating my dad. I once tried to protect my mum - she ended up not talking to me because i showed my dad "disrespect". He's not had a job for years - he runs an islamic bookshop which barely breaks even.

I feel like i'm going crazy. I can't tell anyone this, they either don't understand, think i'm pathetic or would completely hate me for it. I just want to be able to live my own life. They expect me to get married in a few years (i'm 19) and move in and look after them and basically let them carry on dictating my life. I have no intention of doing that - but i can't see any possible way to break free of them, and it's incredibly difficult to just up and leave the people who have provided for you for 19 years.

It's made me a complete wreck - i've become good at hiding my feelings - i have a reputation as someone who's always happy and constantly joking, ironically the guy other people rely on and go to for advice. I tried to tell a friend i was actually miserable the otehr day - he thought i was joking.

my life is a complete mess. i don't even feel like it is my life. I'm constantly lying and manipulating people to hide my true beliefs, and I feel like a complete coward.

damn thats tuff but you shouldn't blame religion, its the ignorant culture. im 14 and im not muslim anymore because i feel like all religions are a false sense of hope, yes there is a hidden force in the sky but i dont feel like we have to wear a hijab or not date. i beleive in bhuddism its more of a mentality than a religion i dont beleive in the multiple gods and stuff i mean im always sneaking out stuff like that I never told my cousins or friends this because i already know the response I would get, religion is a very senstive topic, Also you should watch "VonTooCut" on youtube. hes gives good advice on "how to talk to girls", "no fap/semen retention" "how to stop caring about peoples opinions" "how to have a "i dont care" mentality" he talks about being spritual without bringing any religion up being spritual doesn't mean being religous, its means finding the worth and meaning in yourself and being content with whatever happening, it sounds corny as hell but it changed my mentality

Reply 205

Anonymous #17

Here’s my story:
I’m 20 at the moment. I’ve never really practiced being a Muslim until Ramadan this year 2021 for the first time. My parents never taught me Islam at a young age. I picked up on it around in secondary school when people started asking me if I’m Muslim because of my name. There were times people I knew called me out because I did something that was haram like eat pepperoni pizza or pasta and meatballs, which I had no idea at the time. Also times when people asked me why I attended school on certain days instead of celebrating Eid or why I wasn’t fasting during Ramadan or questioning me sending Christmas messages to friends as a Muslim! For a long time it just put me off the religion and I kind of had to lie to people to protect myself. I’ll admit during my teen years I did some shameful things, stuff which I wish not to discuss. But part of me still liked the religion.

It was these later parts of my life my I noticed my parents started practicing Islam more seriously which I admire them to. Naturally they encouraged me to start fasting, start praying and persuading me that I can’t live life without a religion. I was out of by this because I didn’t know how to pray, I didn’t like the idea of fasting back then and I got annoyed that conversations at home always had to involve religion. One thing that made me appreciate Islam was learning more about Islam in secondary school during RE. Also becoming closer with a certain group of cousins who were like family to me. The cousins are two brothers and two sisters which may I say are amazing people with amazing personalities who always seemed positive. Having attend the weddings of two of my cousins of the brothers made me appreciate the Islam faith more. Especially since one of them tutored me during my A Levels. Although i don’t know how to pray properly or read the Quran during secondary school, I did attempt to pray to Allah at times that I really needed him, e.g when I was in a difficult situation, whether I was nervous/upset or had important events coming up like exams. There were times I believe Allah helped me like making exams easy or getting me out in a pinch which is why I believe in Allah.

To this day I do like Islam. But there are just certain things that are troubling me or one or two bits which I don’t agree with. Since this is the first time I’ve done Ramadan, I made the effort to try and be a better muslim like refrain from music, video games, bad language and habits. That where I decided to read up on certain rules in Islam. In regards to using the left hand to clean, Is it just the private parts/hand washing that requires the left hand? because all my life I’ve been taking showers using my right hand. Also, the whole relationship thing in Islam is a bit confusing to me. I completely understand the reasoning against dating because it might lead to unlawful sin(sex before marriage) which I’m completely against personally. But what if you behave responsibly in a way that allows you to be friends with the opposite gender but also be modest at the same time so you respect them and don’t become tempted to do sin. The whole idea of having little to no contact seems severe especially at university where there is a whole load of diversity. Relating to this I’ve heard that marriage is encouraged at a young age or as soon as one decides you want to be with that person so you don’t commit any major sin. How do you know that person is right for you when you decide to marry them quickly whilst barely spending enough time to get to know each other’s personalities and whether they are compatible? We may be marrying each other for Allahs sake but does that mean we love each other personally or just because the religion favour this. To me there’s a chance the relationship may fail if we are more committed to Allah then we are to each other which can lead to problems. Allah knows best.

Right now, continuing my university studies is a priority, but The reason I’m thinking about this now in case I find myself in a situation at university when someone has interest and people will judge me for the way I handle things. Maybe I’m being paranoid I should let Allah will for life to take its course and everything will come naturally. To put it short, I’ve not been a strict Muslim a lot of my life until recently. But I don’t drink, never smoke or do drugs and I generally stay away from trouble. Reading this thread has got me to question how I feel about Islam in general. I’ll admit praying five times a day everyday seems like an impossible task for me. Reading some of the rules made me feel about negative about practicing better. Having done Ramadan, I admittedly wasn’t a fan of waking up early in the morning for fajjr prayer. I like getting the full 8 hours of sleep. What should I do? I want to carry my parents legacy by being a Muslim but for some reason I just don’t feel as connected to Islam as I think I am. Because of this I dislike praying for long periods and Reading the Quran seems boring, which is why I would prefer to practice Islam at my own pace. And like I mentioned above some of the rules are off putting. I know it’s for the sake of Allah but I feel it will make me sad and miserable. I