Is it unfair to tell your boyfriend you'll break up with him if he goes to Amsterdam?

Well my boyfriend's actually done it.

get rid of him - plenty of good guys around who dont bang hookers.

I don't think many young blokes would bother to pay for a hooker, when they can pick up a drunk girl for free. And if he's the kind to pick up a drunk girl when he has a girlfriend, you shouldn't be with him whether he goes on the holiday or not. So why are you so concerned?

I've been to Amsterdam myself, and the RLD is a bit of a letdown, to be honest. It's surprising to see the women in the windows at first, but they're just standing around so it's not particularly dirty. If your boyfriend watches porn, he's going to find the RLD a bit of a disappointment.




If she thinks that going to Amsterdam means he'll cheat on her, she shouldn't be with him at all. Not because he's going to Amsterdam, but because she has zero trust in him. Just because he's a bit of a lad, doesn't mean he can't keep his dick in his pants.

And no, a lot of the guys don't go there for the prostitutes. The RLD is basically the party central of Amsterdam, so they're more likely to be staying there for the boozing and drunken antics, and maybe a quick look in the windows, than to sleep with the prostitutes. And Amsterdam does have more than just prostitutes, so is it really that unlikely that they'd spend the day seeing the normal things in Amsterdam, and the nights boozing in the clubs?

A lot of people have said this particular bit (in different ways), but really is it that black and white? Don't quote me on the stats but isn't like 60% of people who had (or are in) LTR's admit to cheating? And the evidence does suggest that humans aren't meant to be monogamous. So it's safe to say that if we had to immediately break it off with everyone we thought might cheat if given the opportunity (ie lots of drink, single guy mates, strange country, easy ladies), then the human race is in trouble.

I'm not saying all men who go there are gonna cheat, but, everyone makes (drunken one night only) mistakes

look this is ridiculous, i read a study that said 25% of married people cheat, another said 75%.

your trust and relationship with someone should not be based on statistics especially ones with so many variables!

i agree with your point about in bold though.

I'd say it was that black and white. If I think someone will cheat on me, I don't waste my time dating them. Occasional fleeting doubts are normal of course, but not to the point of ultimatums and banning a holiday with his friends. If you seriously think your boyfriend will cheat on you, to the point you behave like the OP, you shouldn't be with them.

Right, and the kind of person who makes "drunken one night only" mistakes isn't any more likely to make them in Amsterdam than anywhere else, surely? What possible reason is there for the OP to worry he'll cheat in Amsterdam, but not anywhere else? Does she ban him from going on any nights out with his mates if she isn't present? There's no shortage of booze, single guy mates and easy ladies in the UK, why does it being 'a strange country' make it more likely he'll cheat?

If it's prostitutes she's worried about, she's an idiot. If he isn't the type to cheat with a girl in a club, I'd say he's even less likely to pay for a prostitute. And even if he was the kind to cheat, it would be safer for him to cheat with a prostitute, because they insist on condoms, get regular STI checks and have no interest in their clients once the deed is done. The RLD in Amsterdam is pretty strongly regulated, these aren't risky women like they would be in the UK. Compare that to a girl in a bar who won't necessarily use protection and had no proof she's clean, and who might turn up later and cause problems for the OP and his girlfriend.


The RLD is the place in Amsterdam with the best nightlife (and that isn't a euphemism for banging hookers) and so that's why they're staying there. The prostitutes are usually not massively attractive, and they're not doing anything slutty in the windows to lure your poor innocent boyfriend into paying for sex with them (ie you'd see more slutty behaviour in a music video). In short, anyone who has actually been to Amsterdam will tell you you're overreacting. And I think that says more than people who've never been spouting their preconceptions of the place based on the fact there's a few hookers in windows

What makes you think a guy must visit prostitutes in Amsetrdam?

Maybe he's going to go, get stoned, go out drinking and clubbing.

The red light district isn't even THAT seedy. It's much smaller than I imagined. Most of it is based around one street. Some sex shops, some ladies pouting in windows whilst standing in their underwear, nothing stunning.
I was staying very close to the area, most men (and women) I saw just went out to look at the girls not to sleep with them, and that even includes the numerous british 'lads' on a stag do.
Yes some of the girls are pretty, (and some are.... very unusual), but to be honest espeically when you weigh in the factor of paying for it/risking her not being clean, I think it's just as likely if he was going to cheat that he would do it at home. I've seen pretty-enough girls on nights out not wearing too much more than the 'dam girls, and they threw themselves at lads even more (and obviously for free too..).

However he might go to a 'banana show'. I'm female, and well... even I was tempted. Sound's hilarious

I like to pretend they are women trapped in glass boxes banging to get out . I mean, if the OP had actually been to Amsterdam she'd realise that almost all the hookers look like this:


Hardly inviting. And the higher end ones would cost him a months wages, so she'll soon know if he's done it.

[EDIT] This is too boner inducing to leave out:

oh blooming heck thats a bit rough

though out of morbid curiosity do you have any pics of the higher spectrum girls.