Want to break up with my boyfriend... BUT.

OP

I have to agree it seems pretty mean to do it online, was it not possible for you to visit him?

He lives just over 3 hours away and I knew if I visited him, if he got emotional, I would probably change my mind (which I don't want to do) so, it was the best way to do it for both of us.
I've tried to break up with him 2 times before face to face, and he just hasn't accepted it and broke me down so much I took him back, so I do have good reason to.

Reply 41

joker12345

19

Original post by Anonymous

He lives just over 3 hours away and I knew if I visited him, if he got emotional, I would probably change my mind (which I don't want to do) so, it was the best way to do it for both of us.
I've tried to break up with him 2 times before face to face, and he just hasn't accepted it and broke me down so much I took him back, so I do have good reason to.

If you don't want to change your mind, don't, simple as. And I get that it's a distance, but it's not a ridiculous distance to travel. He was clearly invested in you and a goodbye and explanation in person seems deserved, to be honest.

Reply 42

Danz123

13

Original post by Anonymous

He lives just over 3 hours away and I knew if I visited him, if he got emotional, I would probably change my mind (which I don't want to do) so, it was the best way to do it for both of us.
I've tried to break up with him 2 times before face to face, and he just hasn't accepted it and broke me down so much I took him back, so I do have good reason to.

While I understand that you think you may take him back if he gets upset, it does seem that visiting him would have been best. It also seems like skyping him and breaking up is best for you, not for him, since you saw him cry but stood your ground. It's not much of a stretch to do so in person surely? Plus, you entertained the idea of him driving to you, but only rejected that because of the inconvenience for him, and not because he could break your resolve.

Reply 43

zaback21

15

Original post by Anonymous

I just did it via skype.

I appreciate that doing it this way was probably a little harsh and cowardly, but given the circumstances, I think it's acceptable :frown:

Felt absolutely awful, he was crying and made me feel worse, but it's gotta be done sometimes, it's life and life is cruel.

I for one feel this is the best way to do it.Making him drive 2 hrs and then him going back driving 2 hrs while he upset, he could cause damage/accident to himself or others while on the road. It would be a risky move. Him on house via skype a better and safer option.

To everyone else, yes breaking up is hard but irrespective of how it ends, its just hard. One way or another is not going to make it easy or get the gf/bf back together. Breaking up itself is hard irrespective of how its done.

Reply 44

Kazbian

10

I think doing it over Skype in your situation was ok. Breaking up is going to be painful however it's done. As long as you don't say something along the lines of "It's over. Have a nice life." and you have an honest discussion about your feelings, then the important thing is done.

If you can do it face to face, then I would recommend it, just because it shows you care about the person. It's not always feasible though, especially if there is distance between you. Even if the distance isn't massive, it's still a lot to travel if you're spending the whole journey in tears, especially if you're driving. That's dangerous!

Anyway, I'm glad you were able to do it OP and I hope you both move on ok.

Reply 45

username447608

14

If your feeling like this after 6 months then you need to end it.

That said the guy hasn't actually done anything wrong its just you don't click, so really I think you should drive up to him to do it and that way hes at home hes surrounded by his friends and family for support, there would be nothing worse than him coming all the way to you thinking he's going to have a lovely weekend to be dumped. I really think you driving up to see him and do it in person is the right way about it , also I would stress that hes not done anything wrong that hes got nothing wrong with him as a person its just that you don't feel a spark

Reply 46

nmanvi

14

everyone she has already broken up with him via skype so no need for any more advice.

Reply 47

Ali xo

2

I was with my ex for 4 years and ended up in a long distance with uni commitments. We couldn't meet up so i ended it on the phone and we met up when we were both home to exchange each others stuff. Haven't seen him since. Don't prolong it, this is a "cruel to be kind" situation. You'll end up resenting him.

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Reply 48

Anonymous #2

This sounds exactly like me and my ex, except that we were together for 5 and a half years :frown:

I knew that for me it was over after one summer where we drifted apart so much and I tried to end it with him so many times but he didn't seem to understand and just denied what I was saying. To be honest if someone doesn't want to be broken up with then there is no proper way to do it, just something to make them see you are being serious. In the end I fell for someone else and cheated on him and that was how he knew it was actually over. But it was not ideal.