Shy...

I really want to do medicine, and I reckon I'll get in this year. Theres something annoying me though, I can't help but think that I'm generally quite shy. Well, not really shy but if there isn't anything good to be said, I just don't talk to people who I don't know. I just did my first day of work experience with this consultant psychiatrist and I barely said a word to anybody except him. :\
I work in Wilko and I always get 'Yer oni a quiet lad aren't yer...', and it's irritating.
I know that communication skills are essential for medicine so I'm banking on mine improving either in my gap year or in my first year... Any shy medical students on here? Reckon this is going to be a big problem for me?

Reply 1

Helenia

20

I am quite shy in unfamiliar situations - and like you, don't usually say anything if I don't feel there's anything to be said. But I'm actually fine with patients - you're there with a purpose, not just to make chit-chat, and I find that sort of thing a lot easier to handle.

The prospect of having to talk to a lot of strangers (staff and patients!) some of whom may not be very nice, or not know what you're talking about, seems quite daunting, but you'll get used to it. You don't have to be massively outgoing; in fact in some cases a quieter, slightly more withdrawn manner can work in your favour.

Reply 2

cchilstonev1

OP

1

Helenia

I am quite shy in unfamiliar situations - and like you, don't usually say anything if I don't feel there's anything to be said. But I'm actually fine with patients - you're there with a purpose, not just to make chit-chat, and I find that sort of thing a lot easier to handle.

The prospect of having to talk to a lot of strangers (staff and patients!) some of whom may not be very nice, or not know what you're talking about, seems quite daunting, but you'll get used to it. You don't have to be massively outgoing; in fact in some cases a quieter, slightly more withdrawn manner can work in your favour.

That actually makes me feel a lot better, from how you've described it you actually seem to be the same as me and know what I'm talking about. Thanks, :smile:

Can't imagine how being withdrawn can work in your favour though?

Reply 3

Sanjetti

9

Helenia

I am quite shy in unfamiliar situations - and like you, don't usually say anything if I don't feel there's anything to be said. But I'm actually fine with patients - you're there with a purpose, not just to make chit-chat, and I find that sort of thing a lot easier to handle.

The prospect of having to talk to a lot of strangers (staff and patients!) some of whom may not be very nice, or not know what you're talking about, seems quite daunting, but you'll get used to it. You don't have to be massively outgoing; in fact in some cases a quieter, slightly more withdrawn manner can work in your favour.

I have the same problem as the OP, but recently I've been getting out of my shell and becoming more outgoing, especially after my experiences at hospitals in india + Sri Lanka. What you've said is made me feel a lot better though, thanks :smile:

I'm pretty shy as well, but I find that in situations like when I'm on placement I am less so, basically because of the situation I'm in and when I get to know people I'm less quiet anyway.
If you want to do medicine, go for it, being shy doesn't mean you can't be a good doctor.

Reply 5

Tyraell

13

When I was younger I used to be cripplingly shy, and I still am too a much lesser extent. However, just because you're shy it doesn't mean you have no communication skills - it's not hard to think of an outgoing person you know who couldn't express a complex idea clearly. And you might find your shyness lessens slightly (as Helenia said, and as I find) where you're there for a reason and not just to be social.

Anyway, if you do find you don't have any communications kills you can just become a surgeon. :p:

(sorry - you know I don't mean it really, any aspiring surgeons)

Reply 6

Speedbird2008

3

I'm personally not shy anymore, though I used to be shy in certain situations.

It really is one of those skills you improve through experience, and as you get older I guess you will meet more situations and get more confident.

Don't worry about it OP!

:smile:

Reply 7

Helenia

20

cchilstonev1

That actually makes me feel a lot better, from how you've described it you actually seem to be the same as me and know what I'm talking about. Thanks, :smile:

Can't imagine how being withdrawn can work in your favour though?

Not withdrawn to the point of not speaking, obviously, but quite often if you're the quiet one while everyone else is getting mouthy, but only speak up if you have something really worthwhile to say, you get listened to a lot more. Sometimes you do need to (wo)man up a bit and say what you need to, though.

Reply 8

username43584

8

I'm similar to Helenia. I don't like small-talk and if I have nothing to contribute I won't speak, however I can be outgoing and chatty in the right situation. I don't think it's so bad. Sometimes I find that my quietness and the fact I don't like to talk about myself around people I don't know well means they open up to me a lot more and divulge all their problems...which is quite useful in this profession.

Reply 9

scaryhair

12

Not a medical student (but I will soon be an applicant) and I used to have major troubles with shyness. If it is something you want to change, or just to improve your confidence a bit, I really recommend taking up some form of Martial Art. That's what I did, and to be honest, people who know me now would not believe what I was like a few years ago, I am so different. I do have my shy moments, as does everyone else, and I think this thread has shown you even if you continue to be shy, you can still be a great medical student :smile:

Reply 10

cchilstonev1

OP

1

Having read this I feel so much better. Thanks. It's not that I'm particularly shy but I'm incapable of effective small talk and it seems I'm not the only one. :smile:

Glad you all reckon somebody like me could still be a good doctor too.

Reply 11

notepad

10

cchilstonev1

I really want to do medicine, and I reckon I'll get in this year. Theres something annoying me though, I can't help but think that I'm generally quite shy. Well, not really shy but if there isn't anything good to be said, I just don't talk to people who I don't know. I just did my first day of work experience with this consultant psychiatrist and I barely said a word to anybody except him. :\
I work in Wilko and I always get 'Yer oni a quiet lad aren't yer...', and it's irritating.
I know that communication skills are essential for medicine so I'm banking on mine improving either in my gap year or in my first year... Any shy medical students on here? Reckon this is going to be a big problem for me?

There's nothing wrong with not talking if there isn't anything to be said. If that's the problem then I don't actually think you have a problem. But if generally find it difficult/daunting to converse with strangers then I am quite sure that you will be more outspoken after your gap year :smile:

Reply 12

Saffie

11

cchilstonev1

Having read this I feel so much better. Thanks. It's not that I'm particularly shy but I'm incapable of effective small talk and it seems I'm not the only one. :smile:

Glad you all reckon somebody like me could still be a good doctor too.

Hmm. I think me being shy is what makes me really scared of starting third year.

I think I presumed that by the time I started 3rd year (i.e. going onto wards), I'd know loads (I've forgotten anything I knew over Summer), I'd be more confident (I'm probably less), I'd be on a ward with lots of other students (I'll probably be the only one), the ward would have structured teaching (It probably wont) and that I'd have had quite a bit of patient contact already (I had some in 1st yr, none in 2nd).

My only patient contact thus far was in first year, when we were paired off and left with patients for an hour a go. The girl I was with was much more chatty than me and it wasn't very useful.

I'm sure after a week or so at my placement, it'll be ok, but placements change all the time for years.. Once you're fine with one place and one set of people and procedures.. will you be worried about the next? I think medicine is quite scary for even the most confident of people and don't really recommend it if you're shy.

Reply 13

nas7232

19

I used to be so shy I never said a word around people who werent good friends. I too worried about this on my Audiology degree. Hell, I still don't even talk much in lectures unless my mates talk to me first lol. However, when I got my clinical placement.. all that went away. Like Helenia said, you're there for a purpose and not chit-chat.

Reply 14

m197

11

if it is bothering you, i would suggest drama or attending meetings with clubs in school as you would have to speak your mind out.

Reply 15

Hyeree

if you are really shy then i think it's a problem. my middle school classmate cant make eye contact with people because she is that shy. and she's going to study medicine in poland in the fall. i think she's not going to be a good doctor at all. her confidence is non-existent and she is only doing this because her mother has pushed her to do it. i mean which patient wants a doctor who cant even make eye contact with you??

if you are like that then medicine isnt the right thing for you. but if you are just not talkative, it shouldnt be a problem :smile:

i dont talk that much either unless people are talking about something really interesting. i'd rather listen and give advice than to talk.... which is a better quality imo for a doctor.

Reply 16

nas7232

19

You got to realise though many people grow out of this. I go through phases that sometimes i'm really confident and then others i'm shy as hell. I have noticed that as I'm getting older the phases of being more confident are more frequent than that of being shy. It is definately age related depending on your situation so don't worry about it too much. My secondary school mates wouldn't even recognise me now in terms of personality =)

Shy...

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