People who left religion.
I've moved away from religion as it isn't something I feel connected to anymore. I think I can be a good person without it and some of the laws that come with it. Coming to uni was a culture shock and probably helped influence my decision, but it is also causing a rift between me and my family and I starting seeing a girl who has a different religion. (she decided she is more spiritual than religious) The last few months I feel like I am a bit lost. I don't want to go back to religion but coming from a religious background it was a part of my Identity. Some of the laws were easy to not feel guilty about but others like upcoming festivals feel bad to break and I'm not sure what to do.
You're undoing years potentially decades of psychological conditioning, that's going to take a while, I wouldn't worry about it.
Original post by inquisiterFAQ
I've moved away from religion as it isn't something I feel connected to anymore. I think I can be a good person without it and some of the laws that come with it. Coming to uni was a culture shock and probably helped influence my decision, but it is also causing a rift between me and my family and I starting seeing a girl who has a different religion. (she decided she is more spiritual than religious) The last few months I feel like I am a bit lost. I don't want to go back to religion but coming from a religious background it was a part of my Identity. Some of the laws were easy to not feel guilty about but others like upcoming festivals feel bad to break and I'm not sure what to do.
Imo, ditching your religion is a good move. I’m also someone who dropped their faith (albeit likely for different reasons entirely) and have decided not to go back to it. In my experience, it’ll take a while to get used to. Hopefully your family will look past your decision and accept you for who you are (like mature and reasonable human beings), rather than create unnecessary rifts.
You really don’t need to be religious to be a good person. The idea that you can only be a good person if you are religious is laughable. I can name plenty of religious people who are/were absolute d**ks. I’m sure that we can all unanimously agree that Vladimir Putin (an Orthodox Christian) is an abhorrent human being, as were/are Osama bin Laden (muslim), Jim Jones (christian)… the list goes on and isn’t worth giving much more attention to.
I’m sure that if festivals are something you’ll miss, you could find a way of celebrating, whilst ignoring the religious significance of it all. Look at how a lot of the things we associate with Easter and Christmas have no religious symbolism and how they are not exclusively celebrated by christians, for example.
As for what to do, you’ve said you don’t want to go back to religion, so you absolutely should stick with your decision to leave it. If anyone tells you otherwise, tell them to f**k off (or perhaps a politer alternative if they are someone you respect) and let you live your own life. I suppose this boils down to ‘just keep being yourself’.
Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you. 
Put your own ambitions, happiness, health and safety first.
If your family won't tolerate you being a quiet and calm but open atheist or try to force you to fake participation in their religious traditions for show, you are better off far away from them.
It is fine for you to choose to retain some of your favourite family traditions and bring some of the most positive memories from your childhood into your secular adult lifestyle.
I've never been religious or seen my ancestors beliefs as a part of my identity.
I was raised in a toxic and controlling household surrounded by unreasonable people, many of them with a religious agenda.
I escaped 9 years ago, will never accept any contact overtures and avoid them all like the plague.
But there are some childhood memories that I appreciate to the extent that I incorporate some elements of them into my life now and a few family traditions that I continue.
Good luck!
Put your own ambitions, happiness, health and safety first.
If your family won't tolerate you being a quiet and calm but open atheist or try to force you to fake participation in their religious traditions for show, you are better off far away from them.
It is fine for you to choose to retain some of your favourite family traditions and bring some of the most positive memories from your childhood into your secular adult lifestyle.
I've never been religious or seen my ancestors beliefs as a part of my identity.
I was raised in a toxic and controlling household surrounded by unreasonable people, many of them with a religious agenda.
I escaped 9 years ago, will never accept any contact overtures and avoid them all like the plague.
But there are some childhood memories that I appreciate to the extent that I incorporate some elements of them into my life now and a few family traditions that I continue.
Good luck!
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