Does it bother you if your gf/bf slept with so many..

Does it bother you if your gf/bf slept with so many people before dating you? If yes, why so? If not, why not?

Everyone will have a different take on how many is too many. Some may not even want a zero body count in their partner. Some may not even ask because they feel it's irrelevant; as their partner has chosen them to be with.

I have no real idea of my boyfriend's body count; he knows mine.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

Everyone will have a different take on how many is too many. Some may not even want a zero body count in their partner. Some may not even ask because they feel it's irrelevant; as their partner has chosen them to be with.

I have no real idea of my boyfriend's body count; he knows mine.

How come he knows yours but you don't his?
Also one more thing, would it not bother you if he slept with many? Like would you not question his loyalty? I've had this girl who had been in 12 relationships at the age of 20 and have slept with each. I was a bit worried about her loyalty, because that is a lot. And eventually she broke up after 3 months. So my initial assumption that her loyalty isnt to be trusted was sort of right

Reply 3

xox416

14

Original post by Anonymous

How come he knows yours but you don't his?
Also one more thing, would it not bother you if he slept with many? Like would you not question his loyalty? I've had this girl who had been in 12 relationships at the age of 20 and have slept with each. I was a bit worried about her loyalty, because that is a lot. And eventually she broke up after 3 months. So my initial assumption that her loyalty isnt to be trusted was sort of right

Did she cheat on you? Did she leave you for another guy?

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by xox416

Did she cheat on you? Did she leave you for another guy?

She went on to date someone else 2 weeks after. It has become a routine thing for her lol

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

How come he knows yours but you don't his?
Also one more thing, would it not bother you if he slept with many? Like would you not question his loyalty? I've had this girl who had been in 12 relationships at the age of 20 and have slept with each. I was a bit worried about her loyalty, because that is a lot. And eventually she broke up after 3 months. So my initial assumption that her loyalty isnt to be trusted was sort of right

I told him, I've never asked, but it's history. Like i said, he chose me and we've been together long enough that loyalty isn't in question.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

I told him, I've never asked, but it's history. Like i said, he chose me and we've been together long enough that loyalty isn't in question.

i was only told when it was her first time.. otherwise most girls dont tend to talk about it

Reply 7

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

i was only told when it was her first time.. otherwise most girls dont tend to talk about it

And that's the problem you see all over TSR; lack of communication. So many times that the answer is simply "Ask him/her".

Reply 8

xox416

14

Original post by Anonymous

She went on to date someone else 2 weeks after. It has become a routine thing for her lol

So what's your answer to my question?

Reply 9

Anonymous #3

Nope, it doesn’t bother me at all. I’m a woman (24), and happily engaged to my fiancé (25). The only reason something like that would bother me is if they’d cheated on a partner; that would make me question their loyalty, and I don’t think I could be with someone if they’d cheated before.

Virginity and ‘’body count’’ is such a stupid construct. If a woman had slept with 10 guys, she’s a whxre, or ‘for the streets’. If a guy had slept with 10 guys, he’s got rizz. I think it’s like tapas. You don’t get a medal for only trying one dish, and neither do you for trying all of them. If you try multiple, you know what ones you like, and what ones you don’t. I’m sure you can see how this relates in this context.

Reply 10

Miss Paige

8

I'm struggling to get a bf because of my high body count

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

And that's the problem you see all over TSR; lack of communication. So many times that the answer is simply "Ask him/her".

I think it may be best not to ask in some cases, like if you are obsessed and if it will make you sad..

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by xox416

So what's your answer to my question?

I don't know. Cheating is involved in say 10 to 20% of the relationships but I guess not everyone will get caught or be found

Reply 13

username5974837

20

No as long as they don’t cheat on me

Reply 14

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I think it may be best not to ask in some cases, like if you are obsessed and if it will make you sad..

Then don't ask, accept whatever the body count may be and be comfortable with that. Its perfectly doable.

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

Nope, it doesn’t bother me at all. I’m a woman (24), and happily engaged to my fiancé (25). The only reason something like that would bother me is if they’d cheated on a partner; that would make me question their loyalty, and I don’t think I could be with someone if they’d cheated before.

Virginity and ‘’body count’’ is such a stupid construct. If a woman had slept with 10 guys, she’s a whxre, or ‘for the streets’. If a guy had slept with 10 guys, he’s got rizz. I think it’s like tapas. You don’t get a medal for only trying one dish, and neither do you for trying all of them. If you try multiple, you know what ones you like, and what ones you don’t. I’m sure you can see how this relates in this context.

I don't think anyone will admit cheating. Well they may, but what is the proportion? One in ten perhaps.

Eh I wouldnt say it is a stupid construct. If someone was virgin and asking to date only a virgin one it is his or her right. IF someone slept with 10s of other guys and wants someone with similar experience it is also not wrong. So maybe in some cases it is better to know

Original post by Anonymous

How come he knows yours but you don't his?
Also one more thing, would it not bother you if he slept with many? Like would you not question his loyalty? I've had this girl who had been in 12 relationships at the age of 20 and have slept with each. I was a bit worried about her loyalty, because that is a lot. And eventually she broke up after 3 months. So my initial assumption that her loyalty isnt to be trusted was sort of right

Body count has nothing to do with loyalty. There are a wide variety of perfectly good reasons why she has had sex with that many guys in short term relationships. This apparently surprises a lot of people on here, but sex is a lot of fun and many people are happy to have sex with other people before they really know whether the relationship is likely to work out, or even before they're in a relationship at all. And that's fine, too. The fact that you were inherently suspicious of her high body count strongly suggests that you're not likely to be compatible anyway, and that's only reinforced by this nonsense with you hypothesising about what the chances are of her having cheated when you clearly have no reason to suspect that she has. Which also speaks to why this relationship was never going to be anything more than short term. You're clearly just not compatible. Move on. She has.

Reply 17

Dunnig Kruger

16

Original post by Anonymous

Does it bother you if your gf/bf slept with so many people before dating you? If yes, why so? If not, why not?

It's easy to blow every previous boyfriend out of the water.
The more sexual partners she's had, the more you'll blow her mind by how you're so much better than every man she's had so far.
Ok, you might come across 1 woman in a thousand that's had a previous boyfriend that's as good as you and with whom she did not settle long term. But for the other 999 women it's easy to be her Final Destination Man.

Talk to any desirable single woman that's had a number of sexual partners. Get to know her well and you'll discover the shocking truth about how poor to mediocre most men are at being boyfriends.

If you're the type of guy that thinks that other men are better at being boyfriends than you: sort yourself out! It's not difficult!

Reply 18

xox416

14

Original post by Anonymous

I don't know. Cheating is involved in say 10 to 20% of the relationships but I guess not everyone will get caught or be found

Maybe it's easier for you to believe theres something wrong with her, rather accepting there's something about you that she didn't want or like anymore.