Dealing with the embarrassment of letting a breakup ruin you

So like 6 months ago I got dumped from a (very brief) relationship and yet I let it completely ruin me, I basically lost my entire social life, confidence, motivation to really do anything and things have only really gotten worse since then and it's completely ruined my first year of uni. At this point I'm so embarrassed about how it's affected me that I don't have any motivation to try and get my life back together and move on, like my ex just moved on instantly, it's had no affect on her life, she's already got a new boyfriend etc. and for me at this point it is just too humiliating making my self look so stupid, I feel like I'm in a sunk cost fallacy but of depression.

Reply 1

taylor2317

Life & Style Forum Helper

16

Was this your first relationship? Breakups can be hard, especially if it's your first.

I'm assuming you liked dating her. Well, the only way for you to experience the same thing would be for you to be social, and interact with others. 6 months is a bit long for you to feel down from a breakup - have you considered speaking to someone about this (such as siblings, friends or parents)? Usually, speaking about these things with people you trust can give you peace of mind, and can help you to move on :smile:

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by taylor2317

Was this your first relationship? Breakups can be hard, especially if it's your first.

I'm assuming you liked dating her. Well, the only way for you to experience the same thing would be for you to be social, and interact with others. 6 months is a bit long for you to feel down from a breakup - have you considered speaking to someone about this (such as siblings, friends or parents)? Usually, speaking about these things with people you trust can give you peace of mind, and can help you to move on :smile:

yeah obviously I've spoken about it a fair amount with my family and therapist, I don't really have any friends who I see regularly but a couple of people who I talk to at uni sometimes have kind of figured out what happened and I have sort of mentioned it but I feel like the entire story is super embarrassing at this point and I'm embarrassed for anyone who I could be friends with to know about it and how it's still affecting me so long afterwards because it just makes me look really bad and people think less of me.

Reply 3

Jo Jo Cheeky

1

Get out with your friends, she's moved on and correctly so

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Jo Cheeky

Get out with your friends, she's moved on and correctly so

Yeah but that's kind of my point, at this point I'm so embarrassed at how I've dealt with it that it is difficult to find motivation to move on because I'm just always going to feel bad about how I've let a portion of my life get ruined.

Also I don't really have any friends anymore, I got frozen out of my group at uni when the relationship ended because she didn't want to see or talk to me anymore which made life pretty difficult, that's really what broke me not the end of the relationship itself.

Dealing with the embarrassment of letting a breakup ruin you

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