I'm losing the magic...

Hi all,

I'm a graduate medicine in the North of England. Spent 2+ years trying to get into medical school, but have always wanted it. Had a lovely career before hand. Finished first year with across the board 80%+ in all exams and assessments. Absolutely loved it.

Year 2 - I just cant anymore. Compared to last year, I'm doing hardly anything in my own time. I made Anki cards, watch videos, read textbooks (OK, I'm doing something in my own time) but I just can't bring myself to go over previous content for the second year exams. I've forgotten almost everything we've covered so far this year, and I just can't seem to care. I struggle through the weekly anatomy, giving about 20% of last year's effort, and - again - I don't care.

I think I've run out of enthusiasm. I like medicine, I want to be a doctor, but there's so much content, and I just feel like I'll never be able to find the enthusiasm to do the revision required for finals while on placement, let alone retain enough for the actual job. See last year's grades - I'm capable, I just feel like the spark is going out. I'm trying to do some anatomy of the cranial nerves, and I'm just staring at the 50th ganglion of this week, and I just don't care anymore. My peers don't like the content, find it hard, but they seem to have a fire to do well and a fear of failure. I feel like I'm losing the fear if of failure.

Any advice would be appreciated from those who may have been here.

Reply 1

macpatgh-Sheldon

Original post by Ifyawanabmydr

Good evening young man/lady,
Sorry to hear that you are feeling this way after just one year as a medical student - don't just give up at this stage - what you describe is a common feature of medical school, a number of my former classmates went through similar phases. Because you did so well in your first year, this tells me that you have cognitive ability much better than that of the average medical student; it is very unlikely that you got these marks purely by sheer effort and cramming facts.

Yes, medical school is a gruelling journey and can take the toll on a not minor proportion of students; however, although there are a large number of facts to learn, particularly in e.g. anatomy as you mention, if you approach the whole workload as a logical, rational series of facts, quite a mass of which can be derived from first principles, and if you try to associate facts with their clinical counterparts, the whole exercise will become much easier and much more enjoyable and rewarding.

It seems like you might have burnt yourself out in the 1st year - but take things into your stride and they will gradually fall in place. It appears from what you say that your medical school has a non-system-by-system approach and that you see patients full-time later on. Just bide your time and get through this 2nd year: after that, you will, tho still very busy, learn to learn by the complete process of patient management, which, esp from what you say about your 1st year and the fact that you enjoyed it, should be more rewarding and fruitful. The so-called pre-clinical time can be a heavy burden to bear, but gradually, as you start linking these facts to their application to clinical medicine, you will revert to your previous excellence.

In my experience [and I trained in medicine a while ago but even at that time], the trend of teaching of the basic medical sciences has evolved from my dad's time [he worked as a GP in the tropics] in that blunt pointless cramming of certain unnecessary facts is discouraged; rather, emphasis is placed on clinically relevant material that you will use later on in your career.

You mention a "previous career" so I assume you are a mature student in comparison to fresh school-leavers. It is more difficult to study when older due to financial or family or other commitments. Do look after your social life, tho it might seem like there is no time for this. There is ALWAYS a light at the end of the tunnel, it's just that you can't see it yet due to the rectilinear transmission of light [which oc total internal reflection has conquered with the use of fibre-optic scopes!], but you will defo get there if you sort out your issues and maintain your persistence and perseverence!

I branched into the pharma industry after passing my final medicine exams for non-academic reasons, but if you need a proper chat, let me know - one of my tasks is to prepare students for medical school, so I am sure I can rekindle your burning desire to study and motivation to continue doing what you set off to do.

Best wishes!
M.