Is it worth continuing in a relationship I feel may not go anywhere?

I have been seeing this guy at my uni since mid October, so around 4 1/2 months. Things were really good at the start, we have long 6 week termly breaks so agreed to keep things fairly casual until then, but we remained exclusive from early on. We returned in January and things felt much more serious - we saw each other pretty much everyday and went on dates lots. However, at the beginning of February, he had come to me and told me he had kissed another girl over the Christmas break while drunk, and was only just telling me as he felt it got to a point where things were getting too serious for him to progress with that on his conscious.

Things weren't great for a week or two, but I decided it was something I could move past. We had a lovely Valentine's Day which he planned and things felt very much back on track. He even asked what my response would be if he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said I would say yes.

However, since then, we have argued frequently and it has felt less like fun and more like hard work. He got into a fight on a night out which I hate, and he spoke rudely to me while drunk. The issue of progressing our relationship has not been brought up again, and while we continue to stay in frequent contact over text, he does not ask to see me as much.

I returned home from uni as, along with work, it all got a bit much. I am going back soon and am not sure whether this relationship is worth staying in. Im currently finding it hard to see an benefits for the amount of stress it is causing me.

Sorry for the long post! Any advice would be much appreciated :smile:

Reply 1

Surnia

20

The arguments alone are a red flag. If you can't have a discussion when you've got facilities at uni, how would you cope in the real world of trying to sort out careers, housing, finances, household jobs in future?

"The issue of progressing our relationship has not been brought up again, and while we continue to stay in frequent contact over text, he does not ask to see me as much." Can't understand why people message so much. Either pick up the phone and call or, better still, go and see him when you're back at uni, talk face-to-face and sort it out, one way ir the other.

Reply 2

Zarek

21

It sounds like it’s on the slippery slope. I would be proactive and end it. Plenty more opportunities

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Surnia

The arguments alone are a red flag. If you can't have a discussion when you've got facilities at uni, how would you cope in the real world of trying to sort out careers, housing, finances, household jobs in future?

"The issue of progressing our relationship has not been brought up again, and while we continue to stay in frequent contact over text, he does not ask to see me as much." Can't understand why people message so much. Either pick up the phone and call or, better still, go and see him when you're back at uni, talk face-to-face and sort it out, one way ir the other.

The messaging just tend to be general chat while we go about our days. It was fine when it was just filler inbetween seeing each other frequently, but now it feels tedious. It sounds dreadful but the only thing thats really keeping me from breaking things off is the fear of having to see him about. We met the monday after freshers week so being with him is really all I've known at uni.