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Everything I write sounds juvenile?

I'm trying to write my personal statement and I have a list of all the experiences I can talk about but whenever I try to expand beyond the first sentence about what I actually learnt from them, it comes out sounding like a child describing it to their parents?
How can I write more sophisticatedly? I've never been too good at english, so could anyone suggest interesting verbs I could use (instead of 'enabled' or 'gave me the opportunity to')?

Reply 1

Clearing and Applications Advisor

Original post by IDontKnowReally

Writing in clear english concisely is pretty rare in PSs and stands out for all the right reasons.

Don't worry about sounding sophisticated - just write honestly and clearly....then once you've got a draft read it out loud. That's the best way to spot errors and to spot alternative wordings/phrasings.

It isn't supposed to be polished and finished on the first draft - and it isn't supposed to sound like you're spouting a thesaurus.