Look, I need you to breathe for me, okay?
I’m going to take a wild leap here and guess that you are in your early teens. Young enough for such a subject matter not to become all too common place in your friendship group, but old enough to know this site and to frequent it every now and then if you feel comfortable enough to use it for such a question.
- And ignore the people who will not consider your dilemma with a serious mind set.
What you are feeling is not uncommon, in time you should relax enough about it for it to become a frequent topic when even just joking about it with friends, but right now I imagine that you feel quite isolated and have no inclination to talk about masturbation with friends or family at all.
Whenever you feel like you want to, just make certain that you are alone (presumably in the house) and your door is closed. Ensure that you will be alone for some time and not just with a five minute window of opportunity – for instance, if your parents are shopping and you are home alone.
Give yourself time to grow comfortable with yourself and remember that it is far more unnatural not to, then to continue. I’m pretty sure that this has been going on for eons and I dare say as has your initial discomfort.
It is highly unlikely that your parents will ever find out and even if they do, I doubt that it will be a subject they will wish to breech with you. Hell, one of my friends once decided to tell my dad that I watch porn and that had never become a ‘sit down and let’s talk’ moment.
Give it a year or two at most for your friend’s to catch up with you and start to talk to you about the subject matter too. Maybe introduce some related topics into conversation when appropriate to see how they respond and maybe they might surprise you with what they say.
No matter what, don’t make yourself uncomfortable simply because that’s what you think society, your parents and maybe even religion want of you. Really horrible though for you, but still true, what do you think your parents and even grandparents did at your age?