Feeling accepted in Britain (for ethnic minorities)

I'm white but my accent gives it out, that I'm not British. I actually belong to one of the most despised immigrant groups in the UK.
I do feel accepted. I always get complimented on my accent (not that it sounds British, just very unusual and hard to locate, apparently) and I do blend in well, but whenever someone asks, I'm rather reluctant to tell and try to change the subject or make them guess (though give tell the answer, until I get to know them better ).
It can be a burden sometimes.

So today,I went out to the pharmacy to get some essentials etc and as I was walking back home I came across two guys who seemed to look normal at first sight. One of them then just suddenly came up to me and started asking questions about where i'm from and then went on to insult my background after I told him I was part middle eastern and part italian. He also blamed 'my people' for the Paris attack today and was rambling on and on,bearing in my mind this was in a shop and everyone could hear and see the harsh racist comments he was making. He said stuff like 'oh you will never be british,no matter what you or you people do to try to fit in'...
so after I left the store and got home, I started thinking further about what he was saying. I mean I may have been born here but I don't even feel british at all! I've never dated a fully british guy for this reason I guess. I mean, I follow a similar culture(drinking,partying,how I dress etc) but will ethnic minorities ever be accepted into british society?! Do those on this forum who were born into ethnic families feel like they are accepted or do you still feel like an outsider?

I hope you're ok?

Me and friends have all experience this fro early stages of childhood, all I say is that this is just the beginning of the abuse, there is more to come in the future.

'This will never be our country were we can feel accepted as one even though we was born here.'

That wasn’t terribly British of him now was it? Sorry this happened to you OP

These sort of comments that serve as to alienate particular immigrant communities from the rest of the population. If you want to live harmoniously among us, in our land, kindly respect us, our culture and history

Excuse me?

Perhaps he sees exotic characteristics as a positive

Generally education can, but it must be accompanied by a cessation of ‘the changing face of Britain’, a level playing field for minorities, change in social identities/enhanced secularity (or else Islamists being asked/made to leave) and related enhanced community integration, and a reduction in related hostilities, and will take time e.g. a few generations

My best mate at school was of Nigerian descent. As far as I know we all conceived of him as British, but then he didn’t have a foreign accent, foreign mannerisms, or much in the way of foreign culture going on..

My conception, in 2012:



Boy, and I thought I was heavy!

You'll find that's generally because the 'terrorists' are following a common (typically professed) ideological 'terrorist' agenda, whereas the white nutters are usually just nutters

Rule of law + self defence + thick skin + relocation if absolutely necessary

This is termed inter-culturalism, and is associated with intracivilisational 'mixing' e.g. between French and British Canadians in the Canadian model

I’m sure Cleese and I aren’t the only Londoners who feel this way

White-British people (like myself) are now in the minority in my home city (London), although we may still constitute the largest ethnic group, it's little consolation for feeling like a foreigner in your home town


Higher still and you start to spot trends, look at the facts of the matter, and recognise that tolerance is not a sure-fire recipe for success given human nature. I am from a liberal background, am well educated, intelligent, and was raised in a diverse society. Guess what, I’m also a realist

It is also related to GB being a ‘Great Power’ (historically at least), as it relates directly to languages spoken in international institutions e.g. Bretton Woods (which have their origins in the tail end of The Age of Empire)

I've this tanned,olive tone abit light,I think it's because my exotic feautures,they realised I wasn't originally from here
They were well dressed,I'm guessing business men and this happened in a nice part of london in kensington and Chelsea

They’re not an extremist/fascist party

Yes, to better understand, appreciate, and work with, peoples from around the world, including (but not only) at the state-level

I look forward to seeing this transformation translate in a RW scenario

Lady enough for what? It should be your own personal journey, and something you aspire to for yourself, first and foremost, sweetie

I’ll be the judge of that

I’m not getting drawn off topic, sorry; if you want to discuss the details of my private life you may ask me in person

They’ll get over it; an essential part of life is about learning to live with rejection. Unduly entitled guys need to get a clue

No, it’s part of life

It’s unlikely any girl would ever be able to teach me any other language fluently

Only if they’re real moderates, otherwise Eastern (patriarchal) culture is pretty closed in general

That’s rather touching, you must have forged quite a connection with this guy

Not sure the first/second one gives any data on them being more of a failure. Quite surprising that whites will be in the minority in the US in 30 years tho! The third seems to support mixed race marriages as becoming more acceptable and commonplace. The evidence from the fourth is mixed, although as one might expect, black M + white F, and asian M + white F were a lot more likely to divorce; marriages between white M + asian F were roughly the same divorce rate as white M + white F, however, so this source certainly does not support your case



Wasn't supposed to be funny

Lady enough for you! Yes,I always aspire to better myself for me rather than for people but I am a complex person,never dull indeed.
And we can put that to the test this coming week,this week has taken a good battering to my health but new week i'm not allowed to miss any of my interviews( I have to get into a london med school)or my date( and secure a boyfriend before the end of this entire month) and any viewings with my realtor so perfect opportunity to practice in the real world. I don't want to face certain people and still say I'm still single for over a year,it's embarrassing.
Errrr...nobody has ever doubted my dancing skills,so I'll stop you right there. Ain't nobody that can do it better than I.
It's doesn't even matter and there's no need for me to ask ever again because I already know the answer,they always come crawling back eh!

You'll be surprised at the miracles I can work,I love teaching people languages,it's rewarding for me anyway and I'm not like these other girls,one of a kind,mister.

No,it's rude in general to turn people down continuously,it doesn't make you look like a respectable,nice person but more like an arrogant witch,that being said I have apologised and stood my ground,some are okay with it and others not so okay but tis life.
Also will need help preparing for my interview on Friday but don't know what to do.

Yes,I had formed a really good connection with him in the past,I don't think its as strong now with people interfering and all of that but it's still something and I just hope to make the best of what's left

There's more sources in support of interracial relationships not working than those for it,as long as two people are on the same page,I see no reason why it can't last,cultural clashes aside.

I don't even know you but I wholeheartedly wish you good luck on your interviews. I'm going for some too and know exactly how awful the application process is

All the best!

Thanks for the support,it means a lot to me and I wish you luck in all your interviews too habibti x

Lol, I'm a habibi, but thanks

I thought you were a girl otherwise I wouldn't have called you habibti:habibi

S'alright

Just sends out the wrong message

Nah. Honest mistake

Where did you apply?

Kids these days have it in their heads that unless they live a super exciting, glam lifestyle 24/7 they are a fail of a human being

I’m no doubt ‘dull’ in the minds of many, most of the time, and I’m ok with that

Why on earth do you care what other people think about your relationship status? What business is it of theirs?

Oh, you were talking about dancing?

Made me smile


You have the wrong attitude, a mature, self-respecting lady never apologises for having courage in her convictions, they merely politely decline invitations from gentleman callers with good grace

Such as?.. so far you’ve presented 3 that don’t provide evidence either way, and 1 that provides evidence that does not substantiate your claims

This sounds a more sensible proposition, and I'll drink to that!