The Student Room Group

Men have it harder then women

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Original post by fat_hobbit

- Even if the girl does not have a career, and is a bit dimwitted, many can just marry a guy and get him to provide for her. This is especially true for the pretty ones.

I thought most men wanted women to be dimwitted and docile and not 'wear the pants in the house'.
Reply 121
Original post by Subbi
I'm afraid I have to disagree. First of all, we are not in the medieval era, when women couldn't go out to get a job; now, most of women are very independent and it's kind of foolish to rely on your partner that much, financially speaking. Moreover, I think you haven't dated the right girl, because educated girls don't expect the guy to pay.

Concerning the second point, I thought it was the reverse situation, owing to the fact that society doesn't disregard men as much as women (given the sexual context).

Words like 'peers', 'not meant' show that you take into serious consideration society's view upon certain principles/facts. If we all did it, then who would be original? Because mainstream people are the ones who comply with the stereotypes, easily outshone by those who have the courage to discover themselves in an inventive way.


TBH, you are probably right. And if you meet a really chilled out girl as a man, who loves you if you are a tramp - then that guy is a lucky guy.

However everytime I network especially in a place in London, I get asked "what I do for a living, followed by which company?", which is a sly way of asking "how much money do you have?". It's the TSR equivalent of asking what university you study at. This is from educated girls by the way, LSE graduates working in magic circle law firms.

I am basing my experiences btw of what a lot of my male friends have said, so they are not entirely mine. And I do STRONGLY feel that men are under much more pressure to make something of their lives. The pressure only really hits home when you are in your 20s and are in the process of forging a career. At university everyone is in the same boat, so no one gives a ****. It's about getting the 2.1/1st etc

To quote Peter Crouch, when asked what he would be if he wasn't a premiership footballer:

"a virgin"

That sums it up for me.
(edited 10 years ago)
Reply 122
Original post by Bertie Wooster
I thought most men wanted women to be dimwitted and docile and not 'wear the pants in the house'.


I guess thats one way of looking at it.
The male suicide rate is around three times the female one. This is why I raise an eyebrow, at claims that women have it so much harder than men. Interesting, how feminists tend to ignore this fact. I'd love to see their interpretation of THIS statistic.
I've never had a child so I can't comment on the pain of birth, but as for the comment about it not being necessary please take a moment to consider what would happen if all women suddenly decided to refuse have children, we would become extinct. (you can also argue that we would go wxtinct if men decided not to get women pregnant) As for the comment about adopting rather than getting pregnant: in order to adopt somebody still has to give birth, otherwise there won't be any children to adopt in the first place do that argument is a little irrelevant.

I agree that both men and women feel pressure to look certain ways, however for the most part men don't feel this pressure from other men, only from women whereas women feel it from both genders. Yes you can argue that men don't care what women look like, but take a moment to ask yourself who you would choose if two girls were standing in front of you and one of them was beautiful whereas the other was less than average? Speaking from personal experience people do get judged based on their looks, for instance people would call me names, throw things at me and in a few cases people spat on me for being 'ugly' and overweight, however the one time I wore makeup people where extremely friendly towards me and said I looked 'normal' and better than how I usually look. It works the other way too as women who are seen to be too beautiful are called 'fake' and are expected to have low intelegence. Yes, men are expected to look a certain way by women, however the majority of women care more about personality.

If anything you should at least give us a point for periods. Not only is it excruciatingly painfor for most but it also gives men an excuse to dismiss our opinions, saying that 'must be that time of month' if we disagree or stick up for ourselves. The thing about periods is that they don't make us 'crazy' they just make us less tolerant meaning that we are more likely to vocalise the things we have been thinking rather than keep it to ourselves. We also have to live with the paranoia of getting blood on everything, and what if somebody notices? If you've ever wondered what if feels like here goes: imagine being stabbed repeatedly in the gut whilst trying not to vomit and having a headache worse than Harry Potter when Voldemort is near. That's only the physical side of it, emotionally you can go from happy to crying in under a second without any reason. Not only do you have to go through all of this but you also have to carry on with your daily life and it happens every month.

I agree that men do feel pressure to be successful, however they also get more chances to do so, for instance many men are often promoted over women because 'what if she decides to have babies, we'd have to pay for maternity leave!'
As for what you said about women having the choice to stay at home to look after the children, or simply marry someone rich so they don't have to work, I do to an extent agree. For some women this is what they want, however in the most cases these women are frowned upon because even though they look after the children many people don't feel like they are contributing and are simply using their husbands for money, hence a lot of mothers carry on working. Yes there are stay at home fathers who chose to do this for various reasons, however in society it is often the women who are expected to stay at home.


To be honest there will probably never be a fair answer to who has it harder because both sides could present endless arguments for each case and for every argument there is a counter argument, and I'm sure you could find a way to counter argue each of the points I have made (except maybe periods cos come on, you can't deny us that!) and yes I believe my opinion may be biased because I was raised in a sexist environment.



Posted from TSR Mobile
I think it's hard for both but in different ways :smile:
Original post by Nomes89
You ridiculous man, most of the things you quoted are also optional.

You don't need status or anything one of the things you listed to survive, you just feel you need to do it to get women so it is often in fact self-imposed. You don't even need a woman, you just want one.

None of the things you listed are a requirement for anything, especially given the amount of friends I have that have gone/are going out with complete deadbeats.

Lessons:

- expectation and requirement are not the same thing.
- double standards are extremely irritating


You took the words right out of my mouth. Well said. :wink:

Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by fat_hobbit
You expect me to buy this? In the western world, really?

Ever heard of stay at home dads?




Again, you expect me to buy this?

I dont know about you, but if my wife wanted to adopt, and I loved her dearly I would be ok with it.

And besides, you are all focusing on the pain aspect, what about the side of it where you actually feel the child growing in you? There are beautiful aspects of the whole process too which a man will NEVER experience.


Yes, I do. Look up the stats. Even in the western world more women are stay at home parents than men. Women do majority of the childcare. When the time comes to choose who will stay home with the kids very few men are likely to volunteer.

Even in the western world, the careers of men are largely unaffected after having children whereas the same can hardly be said for women.

Your problem is that you are deluded.

BTW. The side with the child growing inside you can be quite painful as well. You obviously know NOTHING about pregnancy. The morning sickness, the back aches, being kicked in the ribs, getting no sleep, the trauma of your body changing completely, not being able to control your urine, pre-exclapmsia, gestational diabetes- the list is endless.

Babies are beautiful but for God's sakes don't try to trivialise the pain and discomfort of pregnancy and childbirth.
Reply 128
Original post by Desperate7
Yes, I do. Look up the stats. Even in the western world more women are stay at home parents than men. Women do majority of the childcare. When the time comes to choose who will stay home with the kids very few men are likely to volunteer.

Even in the western world, the careers of men are largely unaffected after having children whereas the same can hardly be said for women.

Your problem is that you are deluded.

BTW. The side with the child growing inside you can be quite painful as well. You obviously know NOTHING about pregnancy. The morning sickness, the back aches, being kicked in the ribs, getting no sleep, the trauma of your body changing completely, not being able to control your urine, pre-exclapmsia, gestational diabetes- the list is endless.

Babies are beautiful but for God's sakes don't try to trivialise the pain and discomfort of pregnancy and childbirth.


3 words:

Don't get pregnant.

If you are going to bitch.

You know full well what you are getting yourself into.

And sure most women are stay to home mums. Like if it's a bad thing.
(edited 10 years ago)
Let's face it. If you are a female and were born attractive (and work to keep yourself attractive) you are 100% guaranteed to live your life in easy mode. Men (and some women) are going to trip over themselves to help you whenever you should need it. Doors will be opened for you. Every bad joke you make will be laughed at as if you were Louis CK himself. If you become homeless, guys will offer to take you in. If you lose your car, (beta) men will give you rides for nothing more than a few batted eyelashes and the faint hope of getting in your pants.
Reply 130
Original post by bertstare
Let's face it. If you are a female and were born attractive (and work to keep yourself attractive) you are 100% guaranteed to live your life in easy mode. Men (and some women) are going to trip over themselves to help you whenever you should need it. Doors will be opened for you. Every bad joke you make will be laughed at as if you were Louis CK himself. If you become homeless, guys will offer to take you in. If you lose your car, (beta) men will give you rides for nothing more than a few batted eyelashes and the faint hope of getting in your pants.


This.
Original post by study beats
Why would u have kids anyway? Its not necessary is it? Why suffer?

I mean do u want kids, why?


Whoa, I'm not the one complaining - your argument is just a little circular. Nothing we ever do is necessary in all fairness :smile:.
Reply 132
Original post by Ilovechocolate09
What a pointless, ignorant post. You can't possibly make such a ridiculous statement, you either have two X chromosomes or an X and Y, not both so who are you to dismiss women's points about all these things. I could write a big fat list about how hard life is for women, but what is the actual point?

I apologise if you think your life is soo difficult because you don't look like Ronaldo and cant find girls to sleep with you.

But next time your sitting there feeling sorry yourself, be thankful that you have food in your fridge, a roof on your head and clean water cos there's a hell of a lot of people who don't have any of those things, now THAT'S hard.

Rant over. Good-bye.



Are you a feminist? Because you are using typical feminist tactics here.
Original post by DrB
Are you a feminist? Because you are using typical feminist tactics here.


Tactics? I'm not using any tactics, im just stating my opinion.
And no, I'm not a feminist :smile:
It’s true

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