Do you think that not having enough male role models affect boys/young men?

I think so.
Looking at my position, I don't think that I have enough men in my life that I have or can look up to. I am the oldest cousin/sibling, and only one cousin is a boy (who I barely know). It's led to me being gay, and also having a slightly twisted view on men and the concept of masculinity. I feel as if that part of my life is missing.

Would you agree? If I ever raised a son, then I would hope to surround him with enough great people of either gender.

Reply 1

choco_monsterxo

17

Original post by Joe2001

I think so.
Looking at my position, I don't think that I have enough men in my life that I have or can look up to. I am the oldest cousin/sibling, and only one cousin is a boy (who I barely know). It's led to me being gay, and also having a slightly twisted view on men and the concept of masculinity. I feel as if that part of my life is missing.

Would you agree? If I ever raised a son, then I would hope to surround him with enough great people of either gender.

yes definitely i agree having an elder male rolemodel and someone to look up to is important for boys same goes with girls too

Reply 2

Rawnblade

10

Original post by Joe2001

I think so.
Looking at my position, I don't think that I have enough men in my life that I have or can look up to. I am the oldest cousin/sibling, and only one cousin is a boy (who I barely know). It's led to me being gay, and also having a slightly twisted view on men and the concept of masculinity. I feel as if that part of my life is missing.

Would you agree? If I ever raised a son, then I would hope to surround him with enough great people of either gender.

definately. Any young boy needs to have good male role models. Also on a personal note do you wish that you weren't gay?

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Yeah I do think boys don't always have many role models
For example I know quite a lot of boys that have been to jail, do quite a few illegal activities etc (we are in year 11), carry round knives and they learn it from the older boys around them

Reply 4

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by Rawnblade

definately. Any young boy needs to have good male role models. Also on a personal note do you wish that you weren't gay?

I love my sexuality, but part of me wishes that I wasn't as gay people have it harder, particularly at my age when closeted.

Reply 5

username3161682

OP

19

It is a regret of my childhood. I wish that I had an older brother or an older cousin of my gender who I could bond with and look up to. I haven't had that and the effects are showing.

Reply 6

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by Anonymous

Yeah I do think boys don't always have many role models
For example I know quite a lot of boys that have been to jail, do quite a few illegal activities etc (we are in year 11), carry round knives and they learn it from the older boys around them

In that case, they do have role models, but very negative ones, which is much worse.

Reply 7

monkeyman0121

20

I swear you can't blame that for you being gay. All you have done is discovered you are, not turned gay. (If you had enough male role models you would still 'discover' your gay.)

Reply 8

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by monkeyman0121

I swear you can't blame that for you being gay. All you have done is discovered you are, not turned gay. (If you had enough male role models you would still 'discover' your gay.)

I think it is a contributing factor though.

Reply 9

monkeyman0121

20

Original post by Joe2001

I think it is a contributing factor though.

You can't become gay if you were not before.... All you have done is discover that you are, maybe that has contributed to you discovering it but it still would of happened either way.

Reply 10

Mill Hill

13

Yes, certainly. Good relations with the father are the key, especially in the teenage and adolescent years.

Hypothetically, a dad such as Mr Levenstein portrayed by Eugene Levy in American Pie series would be perfect, as highly supportive, compassionate and understanding.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 11

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by monkeyman0121

You can't become gay if you were not before.... All you have done is discover that you are, maybe that has contributed to you discovering it but it still would of happened either way.

I don't think sexuality is set in stone when you are born. It takes a certain number of years, and likely environmental factors come into that.

Reply 12

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by Mill Hill

Yes, certainly. Good relations with the father are the key, especially in the teenage and adolescent years.

I've got to be quite honest and say that the strong father/son bond just isn't there for me.

Reply 13

Mill Hill

13

Original post by Joe2001

I've got to be quite honest and say that the strong father/son bond just isn't there for me.

I am sorry to hear that, but on the positive note you are conscious of this fact and therefore you are in a better position that someone who is not aware of these implications.

Reply 14

Anonymous #2

The real problem is when Boys from 3 Years old are subjected to Education and starting Nursery, the ratio of Female to Male Teachers making up the teaching industry is quite horrific.I've read reports of it being close to 72/27% Female. Boys fall behind Girls from a young age ? How does this happen so quickly ? I believe their arent enough Male Teachers and then from a early age, Boys start to mess about and then only get worse when into Secondary School etc

Reply 15

username3161682

OP

19

Original post by Anonymous

The real problem is when Boys from 3 Years old are subjected to Education and starting Nursery, the ratio of Female to Male Teachers making up the teaching industry is quite horrific.I've read reports of it being close to 72/27% Female. Boys fall behind Girls from a young age ? How does this happen so quickly ? I believe their arent enough Male Teachers and then from a early age, Boys start to mess about and then only get worse when into Secondary School etc

That's very true - I only had 1 male teacher in my old primary school.

Reply 16

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

The real problem is when Boys from 3 Years old are subjected to Education and starting Nursery, the ratio of Female to Male Teachers making up the teaching industry is quite horrific.I've read reports of it being close to 72/27% Female. Boys fall behind Girls from a young age ? How does this happen so quickly ? I believe their arent enough Male Teachers and then from a early age, Boys start to mess about and then only get worse when into Secondary School etc

This has culminated especially in the last decade with Girls finishing University with sucessful degrees at nearly twice the rates of Boys...It is very worrying for Boys, and it screams help is needed to get this back to some sort of level playing field where both Boys/Girls are finishing Education with roughly the same level of success, however i dont see this, i just see more Males being Lambested and Boys getting stabbed...

Reply 17

Bang Outta Order

20

role model concerning what?

masculinity (labour skills)? sexuality (you can be gay and masculine, straight and camp)? how to treat a woman? fatherhood (not being a dead beat)? family values? school?

As far as family values I think two parent homes having a mum and dad only benefits cos there's two incomes. Not necessarily gonna make you a better person :curious: