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Why do women want gender equality in the workplace, but not in dating? watch

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    This is what I don't understand about the modern day gender equality/feminism movement. They want equality in some areas, but other areas they are happy for things to stay the same as long as they receive the benefit.

    Women want equal treatment in the workplace with their male colleagues. They want equal pay (FWIW the gender pay gap is a myth - same job for same hours get paid the same, otherwise it's illegal), they don't want to experience sexual harassment in the workplace (what about all the false accusations which ruin men's careers?), they want the same opportunities men have, they want equal opportunities for promotion (despite many of them taking time off for maternity leave).

    This is all fair enough. Except they don't want equality in dating. Men are still expected to:

    - ask the woman out and face possible rejection (women might give subtle hints, but under no circumstances will they ask the man out - that is "his job")
    - pay for the first date (and possible subsequent dates as well)
    - propose to the woman
    - treat her with meals/gifts
    - hold open the door for her
    - give up his coat if she's cold, so he can freeze (but never the other way around)
    - put the majority of effort into sex (this is centered around pleasing the woman - the man's enjoyment is always assumed)
    - be manly and dominant, never show any weak emotions, keep his problems bottled up because otherwise it's "unmanly"
    - household chores must now be shared. Women no longer have to do all the cooking and cleaning, it's shared equally between men, because otherwise it's gender discrimination/oppression. Despite the fact men are still seen as the primary breadwinner in the household and a man without a job is a virtual disaster.


    So back to the original question: Why do women want gender equality in the workplace (and indeed many other areas), but not in dating? I'm interested to hear to views of men, women and any feminists.
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    Completely agree with everything you’ve said there. And when a man breaks up with a women, men are ********s etc etc. But when women break up with men it’s ‘you go girl atttiude’ you don’t need him he’s a looser etc etc. Women are very strange creatures.
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    (Original post by JoeyA2000)
    Completely agree with everything you’ve said there. And when a man breaks up with a women, men are ********s etc etc. But when women break up with men it’s ‘you go girl atttiude’ you don’t need him he’s a looser etc etc. Women are very strange creatures.
    Yes exactly. Women want this prince charming to sweep them off their feet, while still expecting to be treated as equals.

    I'm looking for some debate from feminists in particular, why they think this is fair?
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    The whole ‘dating’ paragraph sounds like an emotionally abusive relationship to me, that ain’t healthy. If a guy wants to “take charge” and pay for everything and shuts me down when I say i’m not comfortable with it that’s a big ol no from me. Both parties should put in equal amounts of effort, expense and work.

    I think women who campaign for the top list are very rarely the same women from the bottom list. The contradiction is only if you generalise “all women” as one group. Then you see one woman wanting something, another woman wanting a contradicting thing, then your head explodes because what a feminist wants isn’t the same as what a gold digger wants. Once you figure out women don’t all have one list of desires to go off, the confusion is easily banished.

    Relationships should be balance and respect, seeing your partner as an equal not just a pay check or a sex doll.
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    Yes exactly. Women want this prince charming to sweep them off their feet, while still expecting to be treated as equals.

    I'm looking for some debate from feminists in particular, why they think this is fair?
    Or the age old classic "I want a nice boyfriend who'll treat me well" *Meets a nice boy who'll treat them well* "Oh he's too nice, I got bored of him" What a load of ******** make your mind up.
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    (Original post by cat_mac)
    The whole ‘dating’ paragraph sounds like an emotionally abusive relationship to me, that ain’t healthy. If a guy wants to “take charge” and pay for everything and shuts me down when I say i’m not comfortable with it that’s a big ol no from me. Both parties should put in equal amounts of effort, expense and work.

    I think women who campaign for the top list are very rarely the same women from the bottom list. The contradiction is only if you generalise “all women” as one group. Then you see one woman wanting something, another woman wanting a contradicting thing, then your head explodes because what a feminist wants isn’t the same as what a gold digger wants. Once you figure out women don’t all have one list of desires to go off, the confusion is easily banished.

    Relationships should be balance and respect, seeing your partner as an equal not just a pay check or a sex doll.
    I agree with you, and the fact you did not resort to labelling him as sexist and or misogynist and instead presented a clear logical argument gives me a huge amount or respect for you straight off the bat. However, I think a lot of men feel there isn't enough effort from women they expect men to do all the texting all the organising of dates lead the conversation, etc. etc. that whether you like it or not is an ideology inherent within most girls/women of a young age (I'd say it gets better with age) and what men like myself and this other gentlemen are asking is why is that the case?
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    (Original post by JoeyA2000)
    I agree with you, and the fact you did not resort to labelling him as sexist and or misogynist and instead presented a clear logical argument gives me a huge amount or respect for you straight off the bat. However, I think a lot of men feel there isn't enough effort from women they except men to do all the texting all the organising of dates lead the conversation, etc. etc. that wether you like it or not is an ideology inherent within most girls/women of a young age (I'd say it gets better with age) and what men like myself and this other gentlemen are asking is why is that the case?
    Thanks, I find starting off with aggression/insult throwing very rarely achieves anything productive!

    Yeah there’s definitely a much bigger burden on men to make the “first move”, it can be frustrating from both sides as no one is really communicating. There are girls crushing on guys who never know because “if he wanted to talk to you he would” and guys who don’t approach girls because they don’t know if she’s into them or not.

    I agree that it gets better with age, unfortunately it’s still largely expected for men to initiate. Only reason I can think of is that it’s easier to wait for someone to make a move than it is to face rejection, so there aren’t a lot of girls putting themselves on the line.
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    (Original post by JoeyA2000)
    Completely agree with everything you’ve said there. And when a man breaks up with a women, men are ********s etc etc. But when women break up with men it’s ‘you go girl atttiude’ you don’t need him he’s a looser etc etc. Women are very strange creatures.
    I have never seen this being said before.
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    i told you - women don't want 'equality', they want superiority
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    I can guarantee every guy upvoting this crap is ugly.

    If women dont want you, then they have every right to turn you down. Stop feeling so entitled you neckbearded idiots.
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    (Original post by tylerthegoat)
    I can guarantee every guy upvoting this crap is ugly.

    If women dont want you, then they have every right to turn you down. Stop feeling so entitled you neckbearded idiots.
    Try to defeat the argument rather than resorting to personal attacks.
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    (Original post by JoeyA2000)
    Completely agree with everything you’ve said there. And when a man breaks up with a women, men are ********s etc etc. But when women break up with men it’s ‘you go girl atttiude’ you don’t need him he’s a looser etc etc. Women are very strange creatures.
    Its the same when a man abuses a women, he's a scumbag **** (which he is), but if a women does it to a guy (i.e my ex to me), they try and act like they've done nothing wrong!
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    This also reminds me of a straight girls dating profile which said: "I am a intersectional feminist." However, in the same paragraph, "Where the hell has gentlemanly chivalry gone? Why dont guys hold doors open and pull chairs out anymore?"

    I mean..really? Talk about having your cake and eating it
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    This is what I don't understand about the modern day gender equality/feminism movement. They want equality in some areas, but other areas they are happy for things to stay the same as long as they receive the benefit.

    Women want equal treatment in the workplace with their male colleagues. They want equal pay (FWIW the gender pay gap is a myth - same job for same hours get paid the same, otherwise it's illegal), they don't want to experience sexual harassment in the workplace (what about all the false accusations which ruin men's careers?), they want the same opportunities men have, they want equal opportunities for promotion (despite many of them taking time off for maternity leave).

    This is all fair enough. Except they don't want equality in dating. Men are still expected to:

    - ask the woman out and face possible rejection (women might give subtle hints, but under no circumstances will they ask the man out - that is "his job"
    - pay for the first date (and possible subsequent dates as well)
    - propose to the woman
    - treat her with meals/gifts
    - hold open the door for her
    - give up his coat if she's cold, so he can freeze (but never the other way around)
    - put the majority of effort into sex (this is centered around pleasing the woman - the man's enjoyment is always assumed)
    - be manly and dominant, never show any weak emotions, keep his problems bottled up because otherwise it's "unmanly"
    - household chores must now be shared. Women no longer have to do all the cooking and cleaning, it's shared equally between men, because otherwise it's gender discrimination/oppression. Despite the fact men are still seen as the primary breadwinner in the household and a man without a job is a virtual disaster.


    So back to the original question: Why do women want gender equality in the workplace (and indeed many other areas), but not in dating? I'm interested to hear to views of men, women and any feminists.
    You sound like you have a very fragile ego.
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    Try to defeat the argument rather than resorting to personal attacks.
    You dont have an argument. comparing societal issues to the world of dating is simply dumb.

    If you're ugly and girl rejects you, does that mean women hate unattractive people? If you're short or poor and a woman rejects you, is that telling of anything? No.

    You sound like a bitter ugly man. People will have preferences, that's how it is.

    Not to mention the vast generalisations you make. Not all women expect men to pay for dates, not all women expect men to bottle up emotions etc etc. This sort of silly generalisations, which imo is actually a bit of a minority now, is proof your idea of women comes from TV and media as opposed to real life.

    Ultimately your argument assumes all men are like you. Desperate, pathetic and ugly and will allow themselves to obey a woman as opposed to being happy yourself. You'll just suck it up instead of actually dumping her and finding the right one. Although from the way you sound youre probably a virgin anyway.
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    (Original post by tylerthegoat)
    . Although from the way you sound youre probably a virgin anyway.
    .....and that matters because?
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    If all the women you've encontered have been like this to you, maybe you should expand your social circle. We aren't all like that but there's probably a reason why you're attracting the kind of people that you are.
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    (Original post by Jack22031994)
    .....and that matters because?
    Dating is a very personal thing. People who make these sort of bitter generalisations are simply clueless and should not comment on things they have no understanding of. It's really cringe.
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    (Original post by tylerthegoat)
    Dating is a very personal thing. People who make these sort of bitter generalisations are simply clueless and should not comment on things they have no understanding of. It's really cringe.
    That doesnt answer my question but hey ho
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    (Original post by Jack22031994)
    That doesnt answer my question but hey ho
    Think you missed the part where I said "they have no understanding of" but hey ho
 
 
 
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