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why are people so mean to males on the internet

i don't like the feminist movement. some people are really rude about males, and i think its quite unfair on them. i agree with equality and all that jazz, but saying demeaning things about males is not helping and i think its very mean. and men cant really say anything back to posts like that.
i am a female if you're wondering.

posting anon as Im scared about the backlash lol

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Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
i don't like the feminist movement. some people are really rude about males, and i think its quite unfair on them. i agree with equality and all that jazz, but saying demeaning things about males is not helping and i think its very mean. and men cant really say anything back to posts like that.
i am a female if you're wondering.

posting anon as Im scared about the backlash lol

Initially, the feminist movement was to support and encourage equality between both genders and that's essentially what feminism is. However, some people have probably had bad experiences with men and hence decided that they're all 'trash' so it has now become a toxic movement and it ruins the reputation of people who actually support feminism.
I'm not surprised though - popular movements have a higher likelihood to become toxic as more people just jump on the bandwagon without even understanding the point of the movement in the first place.
Reply 2
Social media has ruined lots of things and feminism or equality is one of them. Keep your head up lads
Original post by Anonymous
i don't like the feminist movement. some people are really rude about males, and i think its quite unfair on them. i agree with equality and all that jazz, but saying demeaning things about males is not helping and i think its very mean. and men cant really say anything back to posts like that.
i am a female if you're wondering.

posting anon as Im scared about the backlash lol

its really not simple as that. men have oppressed women for centuries which has lead to so much resentment and pain. misogyny is all around us, and perhaps you have had the privilege to not feel it, but it seriously damages peoples life chances and their social lives too in all aspects. its incredibly ridiculous to tell people to just be nice when there is so much generational trauma linked to the way men are allowed to treat women. it doesn't help anything that is true. but then again, we should allow women to express their hatred for men and the patriarchy and listen to what they have to say, because that hatred stems from one common place, which is the lack of equality for men and women. women don't owe men kindness as a whole when the system of patriarchy designed by men has set them back hundreds of years behind men. also, there are far more misogynistic jokes on the internet about women than men and maybe you havent been on it long enough to realise the thousands of online communities where jokes against women are normalised
Reply 4
Some of those 'feminists' are trolls, others are looking for attention. It seems as though there are a lot of them but thats only because they can be very loud on certain social media platforms. In reality most people realize that the hypocrisy and foolishness of anyone who wants equal rights and trashes men in the process.
Because (from what I've seen) it seems as though people would rather spend their time bashing and being toxic to the other gender than rather actually advocating for true equality. Personally I stay out of this and realise both genders have their problems and I believe that, instead of making it a competition as to whose had it worse and creating ludicrous generalisations, we should advocate and co-operate for true equality :smile: My sister is a feminist and she herself hates the so-called feminists who just sh*t on men.
(edited 3 years ago)
Reply 6
Original post by strawberrynose
its really not simple as that. men have oppressed women for centuries which has lead to so much resentment and pain. misogyny is all around us, and perhaps you have had the privilege to not feel it, but it seriously damages peoples life chances and their social lives too in all aspects. its incredibly ridiculous to tell people to just be nice when there is so much generational trauma linked to the way men are allowed to treat women. it doesn't help anything that is true. but then again, we should allow women to express their hatred for men and the patriarchy and listen to what they have to say, because that hatred stems from one common place, which is the lack of equality for men and women. women don't owe men kindness as a whole when the system of patriarchy designed by men has set them back hundreds of years behind men. also, there are far more misogynistic jokes on the internet about women than men and maybe you havent been on it long enough to realise the thousands of online communities where jokes against women are normalised

This is very well written, however, we do have to remember to not generalise all men under the same category. Some of them are not misogynistic and they are respectful so the hate bandwagon against them is unfair to the nice ones.
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
Bloody hell mate who broke your soft heart:biggrin:????

i need to rep you but it wont let me lmfao
Some individuals are just cracked in the head mate. Others can't see past their own hatred due to bad experiences in the past.
Reply 9
Original post by strawberrynose
its really not simple as that. men have oppressed women for centuries which has lead to so much resentment and pain. misogyny is all around us, and perhaps you have had the privilege to not feel it, but it seriously damages peoples life chances and their social lives too in all aspects. its incredibly ridiculous to tell people to just be nice when there is so much generational trauma linked to the way men are allowed to treat women. it doesn't help anything that is true. but then again, we should allow women to express their hatred for men and the patriarchy and listen to what they have to say, because that hatred stems from one common place, which is the lack of equality for men and women. women don't owe men kindness as a whole when the system of patriarchy designed by men has set them back hundreds of years behind men. also, there are far more misogynistic jokes on the internet about women than men and maybe you havent been on it long enough to realise the thousands of online communities where jokes against women are normalised

This kind of idea that women and men should be pitted against each other is the reason the world is never going to get anywhere, one will always be oppressed in a world with that type of mentality. Sexism goes both ways.
Original post by hiiiii1
This is very well written, however, we do have to remember to not generalise all men under the same category. Some of them are not misogynistic and they are respectful so the hate bandwagon against them is unfair to the nice ones.

... yeah, some :sigh:. Does anyone think it's helpful to think this way? this ''well-written'' way?
Original post by SpockAndRand
... yeah, some :sigh:. Does anyone think it's helpful to think this way? this ''well-written'' way?

Yes, it is helpful because not all men are 'trash' or 'horrible'. This movement has just become a men-hating trend which has made it lose its purpose and the important message of equality. So yes it is helpful to think this way.

Original post by Arthur_Morgan
Some individuals are just cracked in the head mate. Others can't see past their own hatred due to bad experiences in the past.

I agree - they label all men as these terrible people, which makes them look childish.
Original post by strawberrynose
its really not simple as that. men have oppressed women for centuries which has lead to so much resentment and pain. misogyny is all around us, and perhaps you have had the privilege to not feel it, but it seriously damages peoples life chances and their social lives too in all aspects. its incredibly ridiculous to tell people to just be nice when there is so much generational trauma linked to the way men are allowed to treat women. it doesn't help anything that is true. but then again, we should allow women to express their hatred for men and the patriarchy and listen to what they have to say, because that hatred stems from one common place, which is the lack of equality for men and women. women don't owe men kindness as a whole when the system of patriarchy designed by men has set them back hundreds of years behind men. also, there are far more misogynistic jokes on the internet about women than men and maybe you havent been on it long enough to realise the thousands of online communities where jokes against women are normalised


So that... is all an excuse for someone like me to tolerate another person's sh*t when they're having a bad day?

Not that it happens often, but if someone does have something demeaning to say about me because of "historic oppression", I can tear them a new hole. With words alone. Those on this site who know me a bit better, know it. I know the 'social constructionist' arguments inside out, and can just as easily deconstruct them as those people using them to "deconstruct" others' arguments. But those are all superficial arguments really. All this hot air (like any hot air) tends to be fueled by insecurity. All you need to do to destroy a person in an argument of that nature, is find their insecurity, and hit them there. Because that's what is really going on when people get heated about these things.

I rarely resort to that unless I'm dealing with someone uniquely toxic, because not infrequently these insecurities arise from things such some type of sexual assault, abuse, abandonment, etc. These things are very strongly correlated, almost invariably I think. But, IF I notice that the other person is using their bad experiences as a conscious excuse to treat others badly... then I hammer them. Because they deserve it. For being a hypocrite. You'd expect people to learn from bad experiences and how to stop them, instead of multiplying those experiences like a petri dish and "spreading the love" onto other people in their environment under whatever pretexts (such as 'historic oppression'... or whatever tf else).
(edited 3 years ago)
There are a lot of unpleasant trolls, nasty keyboard warriors and cranks with foul manners or agendas in the world.
Being online provides them with the opportunity to hide behind a username, keyboard and computer screen while being horrid to random strangers.
A lot of lhp chat sites, lookism forums, private gamer & facebook groups and have the same toxic highly aggressive atmosphere.
With all movements there will be people who take it to fat etc. At heart the feminism movement it about equality between men and women. Sometimes men get angry because they are being called out for misogynistic tendencies and sometimes women take it to far. As long as you truly believe in equality for everyone I think that’s all that matters
Original post by hiiiii1
Yes, it is helpful because not all men are 'trash' or 'horrible'. This movement has just become a men-hating trend which has made it lose its purpose and the important message of equality. So yes it is helpful to think this way.


I agree - they label all men as these terrible people, which makes them look childish.

It was a rhetorical question because I think it's not.

There are sexist attitudes in society including misogynistic but also misandrist.

Like slut shaming, it's misogynistic because it's a double standard and nobody can rationally explain what's the ''proper'' number of people to have slept with. Nowadays, very few if any guys expect women to be virgins before marriage (and vice versa), usually those are the ultra religious who hold loads of other um unconventional views (to put it politely). So really most people who slut shame so are either hypocritical (they do it too but shame others solely because of their sex), irrational (don't really realise that there is no ''proper'' number of people to have slept with for a girl not to be a ''slut'', it's quite arbitrary and made up) or very religious.

But the view that men who express emotion are weak and inferior is also widespread and misandrist. That is a genuine problem, men have very high suicide rates in part for this reason. It's a double standard as well, very similar to slut shaming in another form obviously.

Whether those views are because of patriarchal values passed on through generations is irrelevant because both sexes suffer from them. The view that ''some men aren't misogynistic'' assumes that most men might be or a significant number of us might be. It also paints a negative picture of men as individuals when the problem is social, not individual.
Original post by strawberrynose
its really not simple as that. men have oppressed women for centuries which has lead to so much resentment and pain. misogyny is all around us, and perhaps you have had the privilege to not feel it, but it seriously damages peoples life chances and their social lives too in all aspects. its incredibly ridiculous to tell people to just be nice when there is so much generational trauma linked to the way men are allowed to treat women. it doesn't help anything that is true. but then again, we should allow women to express their hatred for men and the patriarchy and listen to what they have to say, because that hatred stems from one common place, which is the lack of equality for men and women. women don't owe men kindness as a whole when the system of patriarchy designed by men has set them back hundreds of years behind men. also, there are far more misogynistic jokes on the internet about women than men and maybe you havent been on it long enough to realise the thousands of online communities where jokes against women are normalised

You're right about misogyny, but misandry is wrong and is already causing massive problems (see: reactionaries, perceived inferiority)
I think it's sometimes overlooked that men also suffer negatively from traditional (western) gender roles, for lack of a better word. It is not overt and is not as economically and power-hierarchically damaging as what women face, but the effects are very serious and must be addressed. There is a reason why the male suicide rate is so high.

While not a feminist per se, I myself subscribe to the flavour of feminism that liberates both men and women.
(edited 3 years ago)
Original post by SpockAndRand
It was a rhetorical question because I think it's not.

There are sexist attitudes in society including misogynistic but also misandrist.

Like slut shaming, it's misogynistic because it's a double standard and nobody can rationally explain what's the ''proper'' number of people to have slept with. Nowadays, very few if any guys expect women to be virgins before marriage (and vice versa), usually those are the ultra religious who hold loads of other um unconventional views (to put it politely). So really most people who slut shame so are either hypocritical (they do it too but shame others solely because of their sex), irrational (don't really realise that there is no ''proper'' number of people to have slept with for a girl not to be a ''slut'', it's quite arbitrary and made up) or very religious.

But the view that men who express emotion are weak and inferior is also widespread and misandrist. That is a genuine problem, men have very high suicide rates in part for this reason. It's a double standard as well, very similar to slut shaming in another form obviously.

Whether those views are because of patriarchal values passed on through generations is irrelevant because both sexes suffer from them. The view that ''some men aren't misogynistic'' assumes that most men might be or a significant number of us might be. It also paints a negative picture of men as individuals when the problem is social, not individual.

Men have lower attempted suicide rates than women, but higher successful suicide rates: https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-017-1398-8

I just thought it interested to bring up. I'm not making any point. Not many people know this, that's all.
Original post by NonIndigenous
Men have lower attempted suicide rates than women, but higher successful suicide rates: https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-017-1398-8

I just thought it interested to bring up. I'm not making any point. Not many people know this, that's all.

Yep because intentions matter. Women do not intent to end their lives. You can attempt suicide for lots of reasons other than really wanting to kill yourself.
Original post by Vapordave
You're right about misogyny, but misandry is wrong and is already causing massive problems (see: reactionaries, perceived inferiority)
I think it's sometimes overlooked that men also suffer negatively from traditional (western) gender roles, for lack of a better word. It is not overt and is not as economically and power-hierarchically damaging as what women face, but the effects are very serious and must be addressed.

While not a feminist per se, I myself subscribe to the flavour of feminism that liberates both men and women.

Yep, I find it mildly provocative when I'm hanging out with someone who claims they are a "feminist", yet expect others to foot the bill, and say they want women to get paid the same as men, but want a boyfriend who earns more than they do.

It's... nuts.

First of all I don't like footing others' bills, unless either I offer or we already know each other reasonably well. I like shared responsibility as a opening move. It's not about the money, it's the principle. And I don't like paying someone else for their time in these contexts, or whatever the conventional excuses are for these arrangements. I understand the cultural background perfectly well, I just don't like it used as an excuse to get free meals by "serial-daters" who make a part-time career out of this.
(edited 3 years ago)

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