Okay okay, I know this is a super long reply of mine but pls read it all.
Let’s get started with the first point: “the gender pay gap is a myth.” ITS SRSLY NOT. In fact, it could not be more present now than it ever was. Half the reason why actresses wore black to the recent BAFTAS wasn’t JUST because of sexual assault, but many of them said it was to campaign against unfair pay. When Jennifer Lawrence was in Silver Linings, she told in an interview that she received significantly less than Bradley Cooper, even though they were the two main stars. Jessica Chastain had a similar story in an interview about crimson peak (search it up on YouTube). And this pay gap is even bigger when you take into account black, Latino or Asian women. Simply do some research on the ‘net, and you’ll find everything you’re looking for. Google is free btw.
Now on to dating. I personally believe that whoever INITIATES the date SHOULD PAY FOR IT. and in many cases this is the man, and I know you said that men are under some ‘pressure’ from society to be the initiators. But don’t forget that if women try to go up to a guy and ask him out, she’s labelled as ‘needy’ and ‘desperate’. Besides, none of us women are ACTUALLY pressuring you guys to ask us out, in fact usually it’s your male friends, who say things like “Go get her, buddy!”. I think both girls and boys should mutually talk about their feelings before ‘going out’.
Opening doors for women, giving up ur coats, etc, are all the stereotypical ways to be a ‘gentlemen’. They weren’t started by us women, they began a long time ago with the idea that women were fragile and weak, and that men had to be the ones to ‘provide for them’. I personally hold open doors for everyone, because it’s a POLITE thing to do.
Thirdly, men are NOT the ones who are pressured to please us the most in bed! There are soooo many other factors involved with this. Firstly, women find it MUCH MUCH harder to reach orgasm and tbh we usually don’t w/men (this is why lesbians have the best sex). Not only does this make it much more frustrating for us, but it also forces lots of women to fake it for the man and just pretend to have orgasmed. If putting your own desire to orgasm aside for the sake of boosting a man’s ego isn’t the ultimate expression of commitment, I don’t know what is!
But I do agree with how men are pressured to be tough and manly all the time. This is also the reason why guys have higher suicide rates I’m sure, and it’s rlly sad. It all comes under the idea of ‘toxic masculinity’, which enforces the idea that men are strong, and women are meek- which means that both sexes are affected by it. I agree with you that it sucks, and the new feminist movement is trying to battle gender stereotypes, and let both genders do whatever they want. Toxic masculinity needs to die, I’ll agree w/you there.
Finally (thnx for reading up to this point), I believe men and women should be able to do whatever the hell they want in terms of careers and statuses in life. I don’t believe a woman’s place is ONLY ‘in the kitchen’, I believe it’s wherever the hell she wants to be. I also believe that men should be free to become stay at home dads, and shouldn’t be pressured to become the breadwinners. I personally think that household chores SHOULD be shared because.......you’re living in the same house....simple as that. It isn’t/shouldn’t be JUST the woman’s ‘responsibility’, because basic household chores are skills everyone should know.
As a feminist, I believe that men and women should have equal opportunities and punishments, such as women not getting lighter prison sentences, or men being discouraged to raise children. But I also believe that it isn’t just as black and white as that, and sometimes you have to look further in to see the reasons why our society is like that. Thanks for reading