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TheDailyVent

Welcome to the daily vent, the knock-off version of the daily mail, where I vent and you vent so we can all get on with our days without the thoughts that make our head hurt. In this thread, you post a date and what you need to vent and we all can support each other.

I'm going to start because ya gal needs to vent.

20/3/2023:
I had 4 hours of sleep because I stayed up til 2am trying to finish my coursework for school - talk about dedication and commitment - but I'm not tired but now I am because I had to walk from 2:45 til 3:50 to get home because y'all know transport sucks.
Today, in my lesson, my teacher asked us if we wanted out exams back - me, being myself, says no but EVERYONE else in my class want to see what they got. I'll be honest, I was too tired to snap at anyone so I asked my wonderful teacher if it was good or bad. She said it was good and my immediate response was 'okay I wanna see it now' and I am still baffled by what I got but now I have this unconscious need to know what other people got now.

FAST forward to my free period - did not do revision - I went online and put a bunch of stuff in my basket and I now am about to buy 10 books + a sketch pad. I need to find a source of income because my bank account is crying right now.

Now.. my vent is over. Feel free to add a vent of your own.

Reply 1

cam_taheri

(TW) A week ago, one of my closest friends started asking very weird and odd questions. Such as asking me to share my trauma with them and they would try to push me to even after I had said no many times. Before that they would also ask me other inappropriate questions such as if I 'play' with myself, I said no, and that I'm aro/ace, and then they ghosted me for a month then started talking to me again just to take nudes of themself in my bathroom.
They have also asked me if they could draw on my self-harm scars, and they would always make weird jokes about sex, self-harm, suicide, anxiety, and eating disorders. I finally realized that I didn't want to be friends with them, and I told them that, now we are no longer speaking. I always knew that our friendship wouldn't last, but it still hurt to have someone that close, do things like that. Even when they have knowledge of my issues.
I never wanted them to spread rumors about me, because they are the type of person to do so, but I had to end it at some point.

:bunny:

Reply 2

Bex_85

Original post by cam_taheri

The only reason I exist is because my mother and father decided to get down one night and have a kid a year or so later. Sadly, I was that kid. I don't want to be alive for the rest of my life, I don't need friends, I never have. They don't do anything but mess things up, body shames me, and never f off. The only thing I ever do is mess up, no matter what I do, I always mess up. I keep messing up is the thing, I try and try, to learn from my mistakes, but it never works. Many people don't do well in school cus they f-ing around with their friends, don't care about grades, and don't try. Nothing someone tells me will encourage me to live, or to think of myself better, I don't deserve it. If they care about me and enjoy being around me so much, why do they body shame me, and make jokes about MY self-harm, MY suicide, MY eating disorders, MY severe anxiety, and MY sexual trauma? If my family loves me so much, why does my sister remind how much she hates me, why does my father remind me every day that I will never be a cis man, why does my mother remind me that she can shove me in a mental institution and forget about me. I don't do anyone any good, not even myself. You don't know how far I'll go to prove it. I don't want to get better, to 'love' myself. I want to be dead. The only person I enjoy being around is my god damn pet cat. And once he's gone, thats it for me. I'm done.

:h:

goodbye

Please, please, please don't do this to yourself. 😔 I don't know you, but somehow I've seen this post and I care about you and the way you feel. I don't know how old you are but, believe me, when we are under age we can be stuck in positions, but once you are old enough to support yourself, you have that opportunity to break free and be wonderful. I have not had past trauma, and am not in the same situation as you, but I also have things that I am really struggling with. Things that make me feel really, really low. But, please, I am begging you not to give up on life.
You know, right now, this quote comes to mind: "We are products of our past, but we don't have to be prisoners of it."
We can't always control what happens to us, events, circumstances, etc, but we don't have to be prisoners of our past. We can break free and become something better. Suicide is definitely not the option or the way out. You were placed on this earth for a reason and a purpose. There is someone who loves you very much.