English language Paper 1 Q5

HI,
my teacher set me homework which I spent a good hour on but she decided not to mark it so I came here. Could someone please help and grade this according to the AQA ms. for reference I got a 8 in my last Q5 so I need to keep it up!! the question was:

Write a description as suggested by the image or write a story of the natural world being disturbed. (Picked the story btw)

I am running from something; I am not sure what. I can hear the ground crumbling. Is it an earthquake? Or maybe it's the traitors I feel even more guilty. I am the cause. I have woken and realised today is my last day. It's just the feeling I have—the kind of feeling where you know you're leaving something behind and not seeing it again. Throughout my life, people have tried to help me. But I can’t accept it anymore. Ive seen the way they try to defend me and try to protect; in the end, it just ends up hurting them, my only friends. Taken and mistreated. Those are just my friends. My allies are suffering more than anyone. Dying by the thousands—to the traitors and to themselves. It hurts as much as their wounds to feel every death of theirs, knowing that I am the cause of all of this. But what was I to do? I was promised safety and security. I was hurt. I was betrayed. I am alone.
I am running from everything; I repeat in my head because the idea is so ludicrous. I used to be the glue that held everything together. Now I am the solvent that destroys and disentigrates it. My shreiks were heard all throughout the world, yet no one seemed to care. Not most of them anyway. They're as selfish as the corrupt leaders. No one cared for me until they felt my shrieks, not heard them. The ones that have unfortunately felt me have tried to help me, or so I have been informed. The help has made me weaker and more ill. It is hard to appreciate help when all the help is doing is making you worse, whether it is on purpose or not. I used to feel like a virus, making everyone feel guilty for what they did to me. But after they forgot about me, I felt worse. At one point, I felt euphoric; the trees would dance, the grass would sing, and the air would whistle. That was how I felt at first. But now? I was hurt. I was betrayed. I am alone.
I am running from myself; this breathing problem, which is above all my fault, is affecting me. Toxic gases and poisons that rot make their way into my brain, where they infuse with my natural ones. It hurts, but I am nearly at my destination. I have passed my fallen allies. If I can call them that, The homes of my people have been destroyed and cut down. The people who lived in these homes are also gone. Forced out, Murdered. The traitors are sick. I cannot help but feel vengeance, but I remind myself that it is forbidden. The traitors don't understand that these places provide everything to them. Without them, breathing is impossible. I cannot breathe; knowing this ground was stripped and sold makes me cry for help. Knowing none will come because help died years ago. Along with everything else. I was hurt. I was betrayed. I am alone.
I am done running. I am a ruler. One above all, the holder of existence. When it needed me. I stand in solitude as a plant being used up. It is the fate of heroes, I think. I look back once and see the remains of the creation, which I loved so much but got none of in return. I wait for someone timidly; I have given up on the world. I was ill. Because of them. I try to sob, to weep, and to cry, but nothing comes. I am left in the cold breeze of nothingness, yet everything is up to me. Emotions flood me: anger, sadness, and happiness. But the regret in my heart has taken its stand and won’t get off the podium. I have loved and hated. I feel sorry for those who tried to help. But it is my time. It is time. I feel his cold shadow pass over me, and I see him; he comes to me millions of times a week. But never for me. His eyes are as hollow as the existence and sins of us all. His presence scares me. Death. I was Mother Nature, and I was hurt. I was betrayed. I was alone. He turns to embrace me, and everything turns black.