Rape victim victim shamed
http://mic.com/articles/132159/this-woman-documented-her-entire-sexual-assault-and-the-aftermath-on-instagram?utm_source=policymicFB&utm_medium=main&utm_campaign=social#.PqhBUtHl7
Words utterly fail me. I am an intelligent and articulate man but this just utterly defies quantification or description on any basis or level.
Rape. The word alone is a weapon and has the same terrifying resonance as cancer. And this woman, this remarkable woman, who did the one you are supposed to do after a rape: survived.
To blame her, to blame any victim, to accuse them of being fickle, impulsive, mercurial, flirtatious, promiscuous or lax in their personal safety is an affront to decency and logic. Rape is about one thing: control.
My heart breaks that yet again, another woman falls victim to one of the most insidious and despicable crimes that exists. And yet, I am glad also. Because it is such a taboo subject, such a dark and ugly, wretched and oft-overlooked subject that no one dares speak off.
Rightly or wrongly, this woman has permitted the world to see firsthand the horrors of what this experience is and has upon its victims.
We must stand united in our repudiation of such a gross miscarriage of justice where a victim is condemned and her abuser venerated. Decency demands it. Logic demands it. We the people, right thinking that we are, demand it.
Words utterly fail me. I am an intelligent and articulate man but this just utterly defies quantification or description on any basis or level.
Rape. The word alone is a weapon and has the same terrifying resonance as cancer. And this woman, this remarkable woman, who did the one you are supposed to do after a rape: survived.
To blame her, to blame any victim, to accuse them of being fickle, impulsive, mercurial, flirtatious, promiscuous or lax in their personal safety is an affront to decency and logic. Rape is about one thing: control.
My heart breaks that yet again, another woman falls victim to one of the most insidious and despicable crimes that exists. And yet, I am glad also. Because it is such a taboo subject, such a dark and ugly, wretched and oft-overlooked subject that no one dares speak off.
Rightly or wrongly, this woman has permitted the world to see firsthand the horrors of what this experience is and has upon its victims.
We must stand united in our repudiation of such a gross miscarriage of justice where a victim is condemned and her abuser venerated. Decency demands it. Logic demands it. We the people, right thinking that we are, demand it.
Scroll to see replies
The abuse in the aftermath is horrid, but I can somewhat understand it. It shows how ****ed our society is that she posted a pic of her crying to instagram before phoning the police. That is ****ed, no matter what the justification is.
That isn't blaming the victim, its asking a genuine, reasonable question: why doesn't your response add up to what is generally expected from a person who has just been raped (despite the fact that the entire post is supposed to show the expected reaction to being raped)? How traumatising was this event that you were able to post to insta in the immediate aftermath? How did you "get penetrated vaginally and anallly" if you were "forced onto your knees"? Basic human anatomy studies show that doesn't add up.
Whilst I don't want to judge, but from the limited evidence on this case it looks like a publicity stunt and a really ****ed up one at that. This woman's story (again from what has been presented in the article) has more holes than a plant pot with substantial back tracking. Add in the fact she is a "rape activist" and it just seems awfully set up to be controversial (i.e. taking a shower offered by someone you don't know could lead to victim blaming, posting on insta could lead to questions, not contacting the police could lead yo questions etc.)
Just my 2 cents
That isn't blaming the victim, its asking a genuine, reasonable question: why doesn't your response add up to what is generally expected from a person who has just been raped (despite the fact that the entire post is supposed to show the expected reaction to being raped)? How traumatising was this event that you were able to post to insta in the immediate aftermath? How did you "get penetrated vaginally and anallly" if you were "forced onto your knees"? Basic human anatomy studies show that doesn't add up.
Whilst I don't want to judge, but from the limited evidence on this case it looks like a publicity stunt and a really ****ed up one at that. This woman's story (again from what has been presented in the article) has more holes than a plant pot with substantial back tracking. Add in the fact she is a "rape activist" and it just seems awfully set up to be controversial (i.e. taking a shower offered by someone you don't know could lead to victim blaming, posting on insta could lead to questions, not contacting the police could lead yo questions etc.)
Just my 2 cents
Not again...
I agree totally that 75$ bail is disgusting, and this man should be locked up for a long time, but my sympathy for this woman is not great.
I'm not saying she was being promiscuous or that she wanted this to happen to her however she could have prevented it from happening. Frankly, no matter what the circumstances are, I would never get into the shower with someone, after a party, who is quite possibly drunk. Of course we don't know if she knew this man well, or merely had a few drinks with him, BUT if she was raped before and campaigns against rape, she should have some prior knowledge on what someone should do in that situation. I'm sure she teaches women not to put themselves at risk of rape, yet here she is doing the very thing that we assume she teaches against. Finally, to post such a personal thing on Instagram, that I am completely against, surely she must be psychologically shattered. If I was in her position, posting this on social media, so soon after the incident, would be the last thing on my mind. I would be running to the nearest police station first.
I know rape is a very touchy subject, and anyone could be affected by it. However, many times it could be prevented like this time.
I'm not saying she was being promiscuous or that she wanted this to happen to her however she could have prevented it from happening. Frankly, no matter what the circumstances are, I would never get into the shower with someone, after a party, who is quite possibly drunk. Of course we don't know if she knew this man well, or merely had a few drinks with him, BUT if she was raped before and campaigns against rape, she should have some prior knowledge on what someone should do in that situation. I'm sure she teaches women not to put themselves at risk of rape, yet here she is doing the very thing that we assume she teaches against. Finally, to post such a personal thing on Instagram, that I am completely against, surely she must be psychologically shattered. If I was in her position, posting this on social media, so soon after the incident, would be the last thing on my mind. I would be running to the nearest police station first.
I know rape is a very touchy subject, and anyone could be affected by it. However, many times it could be prevented like this time.
Original post by leinad2012
The abuse in the aftermath is horrid, but I can somewhat understand it. It shows how ****ed our society is that she posted a pic of her crying to instagram before phoning the police. That is ****ed, no matter what the justification is.
wait wait wait... WHAT?!?!Spoiler
Looking at some of the things people have said about her previous posts, I suspect she is not being completely truthful/upfront about the incident here.
The problem with society is that as much as we now have a "rape culture", we also have a "cry wolf" culture where women often exaggerate and/or make false rape claims.
We need to remember that everyone should be inmocent until proven guilty, and to only take sides with facts and truth, and not let prejudice distort your judgement.
Posted from TSR Mobile
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by homeland.lsw
I agree totally that 75$ bail is disgusting, and this man should be locked up for a long time, but my sympathy for this woman is not great.
I'm not saying she was being promiscuous or that she wanted this to happen to her however she could have prevented it from happening. Frankly, no matter what the circumstances are, I would never get into the shower with someone, after a party, who is quite possibly drunk. Of course we don't know if she knew this man well, or merely had a few drinks with him, BUT if she was raped before and campaigns against rape, she should have some prior knowledge on what someone should do in that situation. I'm sure she teaches women not to put themselves at risk of rape, yet here she is doing the very thing that we assume she teaches against. Finally, to post such a personal thing on Instagram, that I am completely against, surely she must be psychologically shattered. If I was in her position, posting this on social media, so soon after the incident, would be the last thing on my mind. I would be running to the nearest police station first.
I know rape is a very touchy subject, and anyone could be affected by it. However, many times it could be prevented like this time.
I'm not saying she was being promiscuous or that she wanted this to happen to her however she could have prevented it from happening. Frankly, no matter what the circumstances are, I would never get into the shower with someone, after a party, who is quite possibly drunk. Of course we don't know if she knew this man well, or merely had a few drinks with him, BUT if she was raped before and campaigns against rape, she should have some prior knowledge on what someone should do in that situation. I'm sure she teaches women not to put themselves at risk of rape, yet here she is doing the very thing that we assume she teaches against. Finally, to post such a personal thing on Instagram, that I am completely against, surely she must be psychologically shattered. If I was in her position, posting this on social media, so soon after the incident, would be the last thing on my mind. I would be running to the nearest police station first.
I know rape is a very touchy subject, and anyone could be affected by it. However, many times it could be prevented like this time.
Good for you. Unfortunately, this article isn't about you, and not everyone thinks like you. Perhaps she did want something to happen; maybe she just wanted to get off with him for a bit, but maybe she didn't want it to go as far as sex. It still counts as rape.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by sleepyspider
Good for you. Unfortunately, this article isn't about you, and not everyone thinks like you. Perhaps she did want something to happen; maybe she just wanted to get off with him for a bit, but maybe she didn't want it to go as far as sex. It still counts as rape.
I know it counts as rape, but why should she put herself in such a vulnerable position. Snog him in the bar or where ever she was, with people around her. Not on her own, in some random guy's bathroom.
Original post by homeland.lsw
I know it counts as rape, but why should she put herself in such a vulnerable position. Snog him in the bar or where ever she was, with people around her. Not on her own, in some random guy's bathroom.
Why should he rape her? Why should he "grow more violent" when "she asked the man to stop"?
We live in a world where one of my closest friends told me I had to take some responsibility for my own sexual assault. (He did later apologise, to his credit.)
Original post by homeland.lsw
I know it counts as rape, but why should she put herself in such a vulnerable position. Snog him in the bar or where ever she was, with people around her. Not on her own, in some random guy's bathroom.
Whether her position was vulnerable or not, all the blame lies with him (if this is proven to be true)
Original post by Dreifusser
Looking at some of the things people have said about her previous posts, I suspect she is not being completely truthful/upfront about the incident here.
The problem with society is that as much as we now have a "rape culture", we also have a "cry wolf" culture where women often exaggerate and/or make false rape claims.
We need to remember that everyone should be inmocent until proven guilty, and to only take sides with facts and truth, and not let prejudice distort your judgement.
Posted from TSR Mobile
The problem with society is that as much as we now have a "rape culture", we also have a "cry wolf" culture where women often exaggerate and/or make false rape claims.
We need to remember that everyone should be inmocent until proven guilty, and to only take sides with facts and truth, and not let prejudice distort your judgement.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Agreed; however, this can be taken too far, too, and sometimes gets into the area of treating the people who made the accusation - which may/may not be true - with the hostility usually reserved for convicted criminals.
Original post by abruiseonthesky
Whether her position was vulnerable or not, all the blame lies with him (if this is proven to be true)
Yeah, you're not a biased opinion at all
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Jebedee
Besides, I thought the mayor of Cologne taught all you left wingers recently that victim blaming is the thing to do now.
Oh yeah get in that left-wing jibe xoxo
Original post by Jebedee
Apparently not intelligent enough to see it is a complete fabrication. She says she has been raped twice before. Even if the outrageous feminist lie of 1 in 4 women are raped were true, it would mean that she has been raped 12x the average. While that isn't impossible, it might make her even at least a little skeptical about jumping in the shower with someone she hardly knew. I am fairly certain that if we take the facts into account, logic suggests she consented to the sex in order to throw this guy under the bus and use him to further her political agenda. This is the lowest, scummiest thing you can do and I would hope this man gets justice for this false accusation, but my faith in law enforcement on these issues is at an all-time low.
Even if you have doubts, you should just remain silent. Abusing a potential victim on the internet has zero potential gain and a huge prospect to cause harm to the woman if you are wrong so maybe stfu.
Original post by Jebedee
Besides, I thought the mayor of Cologne taught all you left wingers recently that victim blaming is the thing to do now.
I agree, White people need to buckled the **** up and get tough. None of this telling nerdy, shy guys they are part of rape culture whilst pretending the middle east is a bastion of tolerance and women's rights. Problems exist everywhere.
Original post by Dreifusser
What, because I believe the rapist should take all the responsibility for the crime of rape that they committed? Such a radical position to take! What next, saying that murderers should take all the responsibility for their crime?! God I'm a revolutionary
Original post by SonOfTheGun
Even if you have doubts, you should just remain silent. Abusing a potential victim on the internet has zero potential gain and a huge prospect to cause harm to the woman if you are wrong so maybe stfu.
YES.
What happened to her is horrible but again, why did she put herself in such a vulnerable position? Asking questions such as this is not victim shaming but simply trying to understand why people would be foolish enough to do this.
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- Prime - law work experience!!!
- Unconscious bias - is it time to rethink how we address VAWG?
- Students accused of rape at university bringing lawyers to hearings
- LNAT Essay
- Gf got spiked on holiday
- Abuse.
- LNAT Essay
- Why do some soldiers rape?
- is it still rape if someone lied to me about sex
- Kallisto's Sunday Question: £ 1,000,000
- I've found St Andrews to be a racist university
- can someone give feedback on my eng lit essay?
- can someone give me feedback and help on my eng lit essay? (A level)
- Scared of outside rowdy city world, I live at the front of my house
- Which is more realistic going college or forgetting dreams and paid cleaning job?
- Does this still go on at Exeter University
- Does Warwick still have a rape culture?
- Warwick university
- Is it time to rethink our criminal justice system and 'do things differently'?
- UK Police
Latest
Trending
Last reply 2 days ago
Why is the political left now censorious and authoritarian??Last reply 2 days ago
Is it true that British unis are prejudiced towards degrees from Scottish unis?Last reply 3 days ago
If the Russell Group was now a fair representation of what it still claims to beLast reply 2 weeks ago
TSR Goes Green: How important will the environment be in this year's election?Last reply 2 weeks ago
Research Rankings of universities if you add Research Quality & Intensity percentagesLast reply 1 month ago
Is University of Birmingham prestigious and respected well enough in UK ?Trending
Last reply 2 days ago
Why is the political left now censorious and authoritarian??Last reply 2 days ago
Is it true that British unis are prejudiced towards degrees from Scottish unis?Last reply 3 days ago
If the Russell Group was now a fair representation of what it still claims to beLast reply 2 weeks ago
TSR Goes Green: How important will the environment be in this year's election?Last reply 2 weeks ago
Research Rankings of universities if you add Research Quality & Intensity percentagesLast reply 1 month ago
Is University of Birmingham prestigious and respected well enough in UK ?
