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...I've completely degraded myself watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    you're a good guy
    (Original post by Ciel.)

    How is being purely friends with someone using them?
    Not that but "These are guys that are sexually into me. I am not attracted to any of them. I am in a relationship and most are just perverted creeps."
    as quoted by anon so i guess using her for her body? :/
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm so lonely that I've began exchanging numbers with strangers online (incl TSR) and in clubs etc.
    These are guys that are sexually into me. I am not attracted to any of them. I am in a relationship and most are just perverted creeps.

    I feel quite dirty and disgusting for it because these guys are obviously just using me to get off. They've sent me pics etc. Though I don't share anything sexual.

    I just want people to chat to, I'm really lonely.

    How do I stop myself from going down this route?
    Pls help me.
    Hey sweetie. I am sorry you feel like this.
    I know that feeling of loneliness and wanting to be wanted (for lack of a better word).
    I'm sad to hear about this. Your issue with your boyfriend kind of sucks. I dont know what to say that will make you realise you deserve better. Sometimes love has to be from afar. we have to put ourselves first especially if it is affecting us. I'm not going to tell you to get rid of the guy etc. But ask yourself if this relationship will make you truly happy. Relationships should make both parties truly happy. Even if you love him more than life... you need to feel happy and secure too.

    One advice that will help is to keep a diary sort of thing. When you are feeling down, for me at bed time, I tend to write anything and everything in it.
    The friends issue... I too find it hard to keep in touch. So set aside a certain time per week/2 week that you have to talk with a certain friend. So you don't necessarily have to leave your home, they could come over or you can talk over phone etc
    If I ever have to speak to strangers, my first port of call would be kik too.

    I would advise speaking to someone like your GP. Alternatively there are many other places you could go to for help. I know people who have used
    mind.org.uk
    Samatarians
    You can remain anonymous on these. Whatever you are feeling you don't have t suffer alone.

    I really hope you feel better and that things work out in the end. Xx

    Pm if you want.
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    I have done this and still do from time to time. So I know that there is some sort of pay off for doing it. We don't do or repeat behaviour which has no value to us. Even if the value is to be degraded. I've done some god awful things via the net and through meeting strangers in person. I felt worthless and disposable and I wanted to be treated that way. My life was in serious risk.

    Although I'm mostly better now. My child part still speaks to some men online. I understand it's not as simple as just not doing
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    (Original post by starfab)
    Hey sweetie. I am sorry you feel like this.
    I know that feeling of loneliness and wanting to be wanted (for lack of a better word).
    I'm sad to hear about this. Your issue with your boyfriend kind of sucks. I dont know what to say that will make you realise you deserve better. Sometimes love has to be from afar. we have to put ourselves first especially if it is affecting us. I'm not going to tell you to get rid of the guy etc. But ask yourself if this relationship will make you truly happy. Relationships should make both parties truly happy. Even if you love him more than life... you need to feel happy and secure too.

    One advice that will help is to keep a diary sort of thing. When you are feeling down, for me at bed time, I tend to write anything and everything in it.
    The friends issue... I too find it hard to keep in touch. So set aside a certain time per week/2 week that you have to talk with a certain friend. So you don't necessarily have to leave your home, they could come over or you can talk over phone etc
    If I ever have to speak to strangers, my first port of call would be kik too.

    I would advise speaking to someone like your GP. Alternatively there are many other places you could go to for help. I know people who have used
    mind.org.uk
    Samatarians
    You can remain anonymous on these. Whatever you are feeling you don't have t suffer alone.

    I really hope you feel better and that things work out in the end. Xx

    Pm if you want.
    (Original post by ~Tara~)
    I have done this and still do from time to time. So I know that there is some sort of pay off for doing it. We don't do or repeat behaviour which has no value to us. Even if the value is to be degraded. I've done some god awful things via the net and through meeting strangers in person. I felt worthless and disposable and I wanted to be treated that way. My life was in serious risk.

    Although I'm mostly better now. My child part still speaks to some men online. I understand it's not as simple as just not doing
    Thank you both for your non-judgmental advice/ personal input. xx

    Writing about it definitely does help, in fact since I made this thread I;ve not gone down that route.
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    Do you think it's only because of your relationship that you're not having the freedom to show others what you're like? You describe a version of yourself that anyone would be happy to be around
    My relationship itself is not restrictive but it has worsened my mental health as I've been put in some very difficult situations, between a rock and a hard place- choosing between loosing my bf and damaging myself and my life.

    In turn, living with the mental consequences of that makes it hard for me to leave the house and socialise with people.
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    (Original post by Zargabaath)
    Then you need to get help. How old are you? Are you at uni?
    i am at uni and I am seeking professional help. Its complicated because although i know he's wrong to hurt me, i dont want him harmed i care for him very much and i know he cant help it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i am at uni and I am seeking professional help. Its complicated because although i know he's wrong to hurt me, i dont want him harmed i care for him very much and i know he cant help it.
    He can help it. He chooses not to. There's a very big difference. Your life and wellbeing are not worth less than someone else's. it's not love that keeps us in an abusive relationship. Love isn't abusive and it doesn't hurt us.
 
 
 
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