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Mental Health Support Society XVIII
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So I am now on my highest ever dose of any mental health medication, 150mg trazodone. Took my first of it last night, and oh boy have I been sleepy all day. And my stomach hurts, and I keep getting an incredibly dry mouth. 
I don't know how to feel about all of this, tbh. Still no CPN. Still having visual hallucinations.
I don't know how to feel about all of this, tbh. Still no CPN. Still having visual hallucinations.
Waiting on a call back from crisis helpline/team thingy. Never called them before (live in new area) so a bit nervous.
Original post by Noodlzzz
Waiting on a call back from crisis helpline/team thingy. Never called them before (live in new area) so a bit nervous.
You'll be fine im sure just take a deep breath if you can't talk because your anxious they will understand dont worry too much
always here for a chat if anyone needs too talk to someone
Original post by Elleee1234
You'll be fine im sure just take a deep breath if you can't talk because your anxious they will understand dont worry too much
always here for a chat if anyone needs too talk to someone
always here for a chat if anyone needs too talk to someone
Thank you very much
. I talked to them and they want me to go to A&E. I said no but now I'm worried for my psychiatrist appointment on Tuesday that I'll be sectioned.How are you this evening?
Original post by Noodlzzz
Thank you very much . I talked to them and they want me to go to A&E. I said no but now I'm worried for my psychiatrist appointment on Tuesday that I'll be sectioned.
How are you this evening?
. I talked to them and they want me to go to A&E. I said no but now I'm worried for my psychiatrist appointment on Tuesday that I'll be sectioned.How are you this evening?
oh i know hostpials are daunting but if its in your best interest i would go i know your worried
i fine just tired from college work
Not getting chucked out of therapy - apparently I catastrophised what she said last week 
Huge hugs for all who need them
Sorry I'm not around or replying much. Still in episode 
Posted from TSR Mobile
Huge hugs for all who need them
Sorry I'm not around or replying much. Still in episode Posted from TSR Mobile
Such a **** night
Well me and Callan were over at my mum's to watch a horror, have some drinks and watch still game and garry (stepdad) picked us up and was going to drop us back off at night
So he picks us up and everything is fine, laughing and joking in the car and when we get to my mums, we were about to have dinner and we usually eat it on the couch and garry said really nasty to Callan that he had to either eat it in the livingroom or kitchen because the way Callan eats is disgusting and he said it nasty, not joking and my mum stepped in and said Callan could eat anywhere and I tried to diffuse it by saying "c'mon this is stupid to be arguing over" and then he full on roared at me and I said "you've got a cheek to say Callan disgusts you with the way he eats when you smoke right in front of us and that's ****ing disgusting" and then he went right into my face and I mean right in my face and full on roared at me and then I said **** back. I've never been spoken to like that in my life not even by bullies. The hate in his voice was horrendous and he's been a dick to me in the past but that was the last straw. It happened totally out the blue and he started roaring at me before I said what I said to him since I wanted to keep things cool but I wasn't having him roaring at me or saying **** about Callan.
The funny thing is, he said Callan disgusts him yet he was smoking in the kitchen at the time and offered Callan to eat in the kitchen while he was standing there so Callan can't bloody disgust him that much. It's like he was just looking for a fight but it literally went from 0 to 100 in an instant
Posted from TSR Mobile
Well me and Callan were over at my mum's to watch a horror, have some drinks and watch still game and garry (stepdad) picked us up and was going to drop us back off at night
So he picks us up and everything is fine, laughing and joking in the car and when we get to my mums, we were about to have dinner and we usually eat it on the couch and garry said really nasty to Callan that he had to either eat it in the livingroom or kitchen because the way Callan eats is disgusting and he said it nasty, not joking and my mum stepped in and said Callan could eat anywhere and I tried to diffuse it by saying "c'mon this is stupid to be arguing over" and then he full on roared at me and I said "you've got a cheek to say Callan disgusts you with the way he eats when you smoke right in front of us and that's ****ing disgusting" and then he went right into my face and I mean right in my face and full on roared at me and then I said **** back. I've never been spoken to like that in my life not even by bullies. The hate in his voice was horrendous and he's been a dick to me in the past but that was the last straw. It happened totally out the blue and he started roaring at me before I said what I said to him since I wanted to keep things cool but I wasn't having him roaring at me or saying **** about Callan.
The funny thing is, he said Callan disgusts him yet he was smoking in the kitchen at the time and offered Callan to eat in the kitchen while he was standing there so Callan can't bloody disgust him that much. It's like he was just looking for a fight but it literally went from 0 to 100 in an instant
Posted from TSR Mobile
thoughts, may be triggering
Spoiler
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Noodlzzz
Waiting on a call back from crisis helpline/team thingy. Never called them before (live in new area) so a bit nervous.
Hope this went well and they don't section you.
Been trying to stabilise and not getting anywhere fast. If anything new alters are trying to push through. I've not been a 10 year old before.
Safeguarding came to nothing and im an adult so if I wanna do something I have to ring police myself. I don't so it was all a big waste of time.
Therapy has since got much more pressure on trying to talk about
Doubt I will pass this semester. Basically failed uni what a disastrous and costly experiment this has been. I feel worthless and disgusting. I hate knowing what I know now. I'm tainted
Safeguarding came to nothing and im an adult so if I wanna do something I have to ring police myself. I don't so it was all a big waste of time.
Therapy has since got much more pressure on trying to talk about
Spoiler
Doubt I will pass this semester. Basically failed uni what a disastrous and costly experiment this has been. I feel worthless and disgusting. I hate knowing what I know now. I'm tainted
When I saw the doctor she told me that the reason why I wasn't concentrating on my work was because of the pychosis and partly to do with the current medication I'm on. But I know that it's fully to do with the medication because when I was on aripripazole I could concentrate better I was even excelling on my work so the woman doesn't know what she's talking about sometimes.
Also I thought my hallucinations was caused because of hypoxia because I noticed when I was on the plane and only time I was on the plane I felt a bit paranoid and I believe that the lack of oxygen to my brain is the reason I'm being labelled with pychosis now.
Also I thought my hallucinations was caused because of hypoxia because I noticed when I was on the plane and only time I was on the plane I felt a bit paranoid and I believe that the lack of oxygen to my brain is the reason I'm being labelled with pychosis now.
Original post by ~Tara~
Been trying to stabilise and not getting anywhere fast. If anything new alters are trying to push through. I've not been a 10 year old before.
Safeguarding came to nothing and im an adult so if I wanna do something I have to ring police myself. I don't so it was all a big waste of time.
Therapy has since got much more pressure on trying to talk about
Doubt I will pass this semester. Basically failed uni what a disastrous and costly experiment this has been. I feel worthless and disgusting. I hate knowing what I know now. I'm tainted
Safeguarding came to nothing and im an adult so if I wanna do something I have to ring police myself. I don't so it was all a big waste of time.
Therapy has since got much more pressure on trying to talk about
Spoiler
Doubt I will pass this semester. Basically failed uni what a disastrous and costly experiment this has been. I feel worthless and disgusting. I hate knowing what I know now. I'm tainted
What happened to you is not your fault and you shouldn't blame yourself. You are not tainted and if anyone thinks that about you they are not worth knowing.
Sorry that your uni work isn't going as planned if you need more time couldn't get a form for extenuating circumstances. I don't know if that will help or make it worse.
Have work this afternoon, tomorrow and Monday, and I am absolutely knackered. I'm not getting a full night sleep on these meds, and anyway, it leaves me sleepy all day as it is!
Has anyone suffered from sleep paralysis before I read about it and it happens to me about 3 times a month. It's a bit freaky.
Afternoon folks
Feeling positive today! How are we all?
Feeling positive today! How are we all?
Original post by iEthan
Afternoon folks
Feeling positive today! How are we all?
Feeling positive today! How are we all?
A bit better
Glad you're feeling positive! 
Original post by chelseadagg3r
A bit better Glad you're feeling positive!
Glad you're feeling positive! glad to hear that lovely 
Today brings some many good memories that hurts to remember them. :/
It's time for one of my usual interpretation points, I was thinking back that even when I started getting heavily depressed (12 years ago now) I still coped to the point I could still enjoy things like reading, playing video games, even going for a drink at pub I just wasn't pulsing/excited/full of energy when doing so in fact I still wanted my weekly night out and going without it made me feel miserable, or if I was bored as didn't go out of house that day or was skint I may find some pennies and go to 24 hour supermarket.
Now I have plenty of money (well I get ESA and DLA so rather than have £40 a week JSA and pay bills on top I get £142 and no bills to pay) I will be very thrifty only because I have cupboards of food, and freezer of food even though I know going out of the house is good for me the other part of brain is saying I don't need to.
So I am stuck in the middle, also if I do go out think of it like an addiction where someone who has gone cold turkey suddenly is surrounded by what they can't have so goes back to it, not in the sense I am saying addiction in the sense I am saying I am addicted to shopping but that as I put off everything be it shopping, even going for a walk, or even as simple as a night out when I do so I am into the routine when the best thing is having it in small regular does when I don't bottle it up so crave it when I don't have it.
Its why also I eat take outs, I can go days or a week or more without one then buy a big one, then find I am eating take out every day for like a week, till one day I may just not have cash in wallet to get one so I eat home cooking for a few days and think "why was I even craving take aways"
Sorry wanted to get this out there and wanted some feedback on it.
Now I have plenty of money (well I get ESA and DLA so rather than have £40 a week JSA and pay bills on top I get £142 and no bills to pay) I will be very thrifty only because I have cupboards of food, and freezer of food even though I know going out of the house is good for me the other part of brain is saying I don't need to.
So I am stuck in the middle, also if I do go out think of it like an addiction where someone who has gone cold turkey suddenly is surrounded by what they can't have so goes back to it, not in the sense I am saying addiction in the sense I am saying I am addicted to shopping but that as I put off everything be it shopping, even going for a walk, or even as simple as a night out when I do so I am into the routine when the best thing is having it in small regular does when I don't bottle it up so crave it when I don't have it.
Its why also I eat take outs, I can go days or a week or more without one then buy a big one, then find I am eating take out every day for like a week, till one day I may just not have cash in wallet to get one so I eat home cooking for a few days and think "why was I even craving take aways"
Sorry wanted to get this out there and wanted some feedback on it.
Things that don't help in psychosis: being alone in the house on fireworks night and the police showing up at your door unexpectedly (someone had stolen a motorbike on our road)
