Univeristy With Depression
Hi, I recently started studying music production at Leeds College of Music. I was half excited, half terrified when I went and this was a completely out of the blue move from me. I am 21 years old and I would never have expected myself to go to university in my wildest dreams. I got bad GCSE's and when it came to college, I started noticing early symptons of depression. Once college was over, I was going through a bad break up and my university course I was due to start got cancelled due to poor interest. This made me wonder what I actually wanted to do in life, did I want to do this course that I was about to enrol on? I then went onto job seekers and nearly half a year later I had a job and I was so proud. 2 years down the line I began to think maybe there was more for me than a boring job, so I applied for university to do something that I've never done academically before (and a passion of mine) and that was music. I was amazed when I actually got onto the course and I was mega proud.
When it came to starting university I had the obvious nerves and when I was so scared I didn't take much notice of it. Months had passed and I was struggling to get out of bed for lectures and I had no motivation at all. I am dreading going back. I have made no friends at university, and I hate every moment I am there. I have done well in some of my assignments but I hate it. I have this idea that university is for me, but of course I am assuming the worst if I don't continue to go. The thought of going back makes me feel physically sick and I don't know what to do. I think I definitely want to drop out but I want to know if people have dropped out before? and how was it for you?
When it came to starting university I had the obvious nerves and when I was so scared I didn't take much notice of it. Months had passed and I was struggling to get out of bed for lectures and I had no motivation at all. I am dreading going back. I have made no friends at university, and I hate every moment I am there. I have done well in some of my assignments but I hate it. I have this idea that university is for me, but of course I am assuming the worst if I don't continue to go. The thought of going back makes me feel physically sick and I don't know what to do. I think I definitely want to drop out but I want to know if people have dropped out before? and how was it for you?
Stick it out if you can bro! 
See the psych services at the uni.
See the psych services at the uni.
I've been told I should stick it out by tons of people and I keep thinking "but why?" The pathway I have chosen rarely has many jobs in it and I don't think I picked the right subject to study. It has made my one passion become so much of a chore. I haven't picked up a guitar since I last had to do uni work early last month, it has sucked all the motivation out of me and my love for this subject.
Where as illness is involved, I'm finding it harder and harder every day to get out of bed, to talk to people. I don't think I can get through an entire day without thinking something bad about myself. It's getting in the way of everything and I think I need a huge break to decide what I want and if this is the right choice but I fear that if I drop out now, that's it and I'll never have another chance like this ever again. I'm so isolated when I'm at university, I don't even speak to my flat mates. It's the worst feeling. It feels like I'm so alone when I'm at university and it gets harder and harder to be there every day
Where as illness is involved, I'm finding it harder and harder every day to get out of bed, to talk to people. I don't think I can get through an entire day without thinking something bad about myself. It's getting in the way of everything and I think I need a huge break to decide what I want and if this is the right choice but I fear that if I drop out now, that's it and I'll never have another chance like this ever again. I'm so isolated when I'm at university, I don't even speak to my flat mates. It's the worst feeling. It feels like I'm so alone when I'm at university and it gets harder and harder to be there every day
Hey
I'm so sorry to hear about your experience at uni so far, but you've come so far and you're nearly halfway through!
Have you thought about talking to someone here at LCoM? When I was studying I went a few times to talk my problems through with the lovely people at student support. Visit this page and have a think about it: http://space.lcm.ac.uk/course/view.php?id=922
I wish you all the best!
Jemma
I'm so sorry to hear about your experience at uni so far, but you've come so far and you're nearly halfway through!
Have you thought about talking to someone here at LCoM? When I was studying I went a few times to talk my problems through with the lovely people at student support. Visit this page and have a think about it: http://space.lcm.ac.uk/course/view.php?id=922
I wish you all the best!
Jemma
Hiya, I'm a coach... hope this helps you.....
I've been told I should stick it out by tons of people and I keep thinking "but why?" The pathway I have chosen rarely has many jobs in it and I don't think I picked the right subject to study. It has made my one passion become so much of a chore. I haven't picked up a guitar since I last had to do uni work early last month, it has sucked all the motivation out of me and my love for this subject.
THE FACT THAT YOU SAY 'IT HAS MADE MY ONE PASSION BECOME SO MUCH OF A CHORE' AND THE FACT THAT IT HAS ACTUALLY 'PUT YOU OFF' PLAYING THE GUITAR REALLY IS IMPORTANT AND YOU ARE RIGHT TO LISTEN TO IT.... AND THUIS WOULD MAKE THE 'FED-UP' AND THEN DEPRESSION FEEELINGS WORSE.... WHATEVER YOU STUDY NEEDS TO BE SUPPORTING YOU, NOT WORKING AGAINST YOU..... DON'T GIVE UP.... TRY ANOTHER PATH... SEARCH FOR BETTER WAYS OF SUPPORTING WHAT YOU WANT TO DO... SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO PUT UP WITH SOME LOWS BEFORE WE FIND THE RIGHT THINGS FOR US.... ARE THERE PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT HAVE ACHIEVED WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING TO ACHIEVE THAT YOU CAN ASK ADVICE FROM.... THEY MAY BE ABLE TO SUGGEST BETTER ALTERNATIVES FOR YOU.
Where as illness is involved, I'm finding it harder and harder every day to get out of bed, to talk to people. I don't think I can get through an entire day without thinking something bad about myself.
THIS IS HOW THINGS CAN BEGIN TO SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL... GAIN YOUR CONTROL BACK.... TELL YOURSELF 'STOP' WHEN YOU THINK NEGATIVELY..... START TO MOVE YOUR FOCUS BACK TO WHAT YOU WANT.. MAYBE EVEN NEED TO DO.... DO NOT LET ANY WALLS STOP YOU.... KEEP FOCUSING AND YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO ACHIEVE AND, IMPORTANTLY, TO 'ENJOY' PROGRESSING.... WHEN YOU FIND THE RIGHT WAY/PROGRAMME/ETC FOR YOU, YOU WILL KNOW, AS YOU WILL ENJOY IT AND WILL NO LONGER BE FIGHTING AGAINST IT... YOU ARE RIGHT.... IF YOU ARE NOT ENJOYING WHAT YOU ARE WORKING TOWARDS THEN DO SOMETHGING ABOUT IT.
It's getting in the way of everything and I think I need a huge break to decide what I want and if this is the right choice but I fear that if I drop out now, that's it and I'll never have another chance like this ever again. I'm so isolated when I'm at university, I don't even speak to my flat mates. It's the worst feeling. It feels like I'm so alone when I'm at university and it gets harder and harder to be there every day.
THERE ARE ALWAYS OPPORTUNITIES, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU BECOME ALIGNED WITH WHAT YOU TRULY WANT AND NEED TO BE DOING IN YOUR LIFE.
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS FOR US TO BE HAPPY.
YOUR LIFE, AT THE MOMENT, IS WHAT YOU HAVE CHOSEN SO FAR.... IF YOU ARE DESPERATELY UNHAPPY THEN YOU MUST DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.... GIVE YOURSELF QUITE TIME TO GET SOME GOOD ANSWERS ON HOW YOU CAN MOVE FORWARD IN A WAY THAT MAKES YOU HAPPIER.
GIVE YOURSELF FREEDOM TO EXPLORE MIND MAPPING, YOU MAY BE SURPRISED AT WHAT DIRECTION IT CAN LEAD TO.... ASK 'GOOD' QUESTIONS (AS YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED TO SEARCH FOR ANSWERS FOR YOU)... EG "WHAT CAN I DO TO MOVE ME FORWARD".... "HOW CAN I FIND THE COURSE I WANT", OR "WHO CAN I ASK FOR GOOD ADVICE"...... GIVE YOURSELF QUIET TIME/SPACE TO FIND OUT GOOD ANSWERS (DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS LIKE "WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME" ETC.... AS YOUR BRAIN WILL ALSO GIVE YOU LOTS OF NEGATIVE ANSWERS.... REMEMBER... ASK GOOD QUESTIONS AND YOU WILL RECEIVE GOOD ANSWERS.
GOOD LUCK, AND FOR MORE HELP JUST TEXT ME
Original post by ayoryry
Hi, I recently started studying music production at Leeds College of Music. I was half excited, half terrified when I went and this was a completely out of the blue move from me. I am 21 years old and I would never have expected myself to go to university in my wildest dreams. I got bad GCSE's and when it came to college, I started noticing early symptons of depression. Once college was over, I was going through a bad break up and my university course I was due to start got cancelled due to poor interest. This made me wonder what I actually wanted to do in life, did I want to do this course that I was about to enrol on?
IT'S A GOOD THING WHEN YOU CAN START TO TUNE INTO YOURSELF AND REALISE FULLY WHAT YOU WANT TO DO I YOUR LIFE.
I then went onto job seekers and nearly half a year later I had a job and I was so proud.
THAT MUST HAVE FELT GOOD?
A SENSE A 'PURPOSE' IS AN EXCELLENT ANTIDOTE TO DEPRESSION.
2 years down the line I began to think maybe there was more for me than a boring job, so I applied for university to do something that I've never done academically before (and a passion of mine) and that was music. I was amazed when I actually got onto the course and I was mega proud.
AMAZED? BUT WHY NOT. YOU ARE ALWAYS 'GOOD ENOUGH'. AND FANTASTIC IF YOU CAN WORK TOWARDS YOUR TRUE PASSIONS.
When it came to starting university I had the obvious nerves and when I was so scared I didn't take much notice of it.
CHECK IN ON WHAT YOU FEAR..... EG. FEAR OF NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH, FEAR OF FAILURE... FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT, THINK OF THE STEPS YOU NEED TO TAKE TO GET THERE... CHECK-IN ON WHAT MAY BE STOPPING YOU FROM ACHIEVING YOUR SUCCESS.... WHEN YOU FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT AND WHERE YOU'D LIKE TO BE RIGHT NOW... 'VIVIDLY THINK ABOUT IT', BRING IN YOUR FULL SENSES AS IF YOU ARE THERE AND ENJOY IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE..... THIS ALL GIVE YOUR MIND A LOVELY NEW THINKING TO REFER TO AND STEER TOWARD.... THIS IS A GOOD HABIT TO REPEAT AND REPEAT.
Months had passed and I was struggling to get out of bed for lectures and I had no motivation at all. I am dreading going back. I have made no friends at university, and I hate every moment I am there. I have done well in some of my assignments but I hate it. I have this idea that university is for me, but of course I am assuming the worst if I don't continue to go. The thought of going back makes me feel physically sick and I don't know what to do. I think I definitely want to drop out but I want to know if people have dropped out before? and how was it for you?
IT'S A GOOD THING WHEN YOU CAN START TO TUNE INTO YOURSELF AND REALISE FULLY WHAT YOU WANT TO DO I YOUR LIFE.
I then went onto job seekers and nearly half a year later I had a job and I was so proud.
THAT MUST HAVE FELT GOOD?
A SENSE A 'PURPOSE' IS AN EXCELLENT ANTIDOTE TO DEPRESSION.
2 years down the line I began to think maybe there was more for me than a boring job, so I applied for university to do something that I've never done academically before (and a passion of mine) and that was music. I was amazed when I actually got onto the course and I was mega proud.
AMAZED? BUT WHY NOT. YOU ARE ALWAYS 'GOOD ENOUGH'. AND FANTASTIC IF YOU CAN WORK TOWARDS YOUR TRUE PASSIONS.
When it came to starting university I had the obvious nerves and when I was so scared I didn't take much notice of it.
CHECK IN ON WHAT YOU FEAR..... EG. FEAR OF NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH, FEAR OF FAILURE... FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT, THINK OF THE STEPS YOU NEED TO TAKE TO GET THERE... CHECK-IN ON WHAT MAY BE STOPPING YOU FROM ACHIEVING YOUR SUCCESS.... WHEN YOU FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT AND WHERE YOU'D LIKE TO BE RIGHT NOW... 'VIVIDLY THINK ABOUT IT', BRING IN YOUR FULL SENSES AS IF YOU ARE THERE AND ENJOY IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE..... THIS ALL GIVE YOUR MIND A LOVELY NEW THINKING TO REFER TO AND STEER TOWARD.... THIS IS A GOOD HABIT TO REPEAT AND REPEAT.
Months had passed and I was struggling to get out of bed for lectures and I had no motivation at all. I am dreading going back. I have made no friends at university, and I hate every moment I am there. I have done well in some of my assignments but I hate it. I have this idea that university is for me, but of course I am assuming the worst if I don't continue to go. The thought of going back makes me feel physically sick and I don't know what to do. I think I definitely want to drop out but I want to know if people have dropped out before? and how was it for you?
I've been told I should stick it out by tons of people and I keep thinking "but why?" The pathway I have chosen rarely has many jobs in it and I don't think I picked the right subject to study. It has made my one passion become so much of a chore. I haven't picked up a guitar since I last had to do uni work early last month, it has sucked all the motivation out of me and my love for this subject.
THE FACT THAT YOU SAY 'IT HAS MADE MY ONE PASSION BECOME SO MUCH OF A CHORE' AND THE FACT THAT IT HAS ACTUALLY 'PUT YOU OFF' PLAYING THE GUITAR REALLY IS IMPORTANT AND YOU ARE RIGHT TO LISTEN TO IT.... AND THUIS WOULD MAKE THE 'FED-UP' AND THEN DEPRESSION FEEELINGS WORSE.... WHATEVER YOU STUDY NEEDS TO BE SUPPORTING YOU, NOT WORKING AGAINST YOU..... DON'T GIVE UP.... TRY ANOTHER PATH... SEARCH FOR BETTER WAYS OF SUPPORTING WHAT YOU WANT TO DO... SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO PUT UP WITH SOME LOWS BEFORE WE FIND THE RIGHT THINGS FOR US.... ARE THERE PEOPLE OUT THERE THAT HAVE ACHIEVED WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING TO ACHIEVE THAT YOU CAN ASK ADVICE FROM.... THEY MAY BE ABLE TO SUGGEST BETTER ALTERNATIVES FOR YOU.
Where as illness is involved, I'm finding it harder and harder every day to get out of bed, to talk to people. I don't think I can get through an entire day without thinking something bad about myself.
THIS IS HOW THINGS CAN BEGIN TO SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL... GAIN YOUR CONTROL BACK.... TELL YOURSELF 'STOP' WHEN YOU THINK NEGATIVELY..... START TO MOVE YOUR FOCUS BACK TO WHAT YOU WANT.. MAYBE EVEN NEED TO DO.... DO NOT LET ANY WALLS STOP YOU.... KEEP FOCUSING AND YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO ACHIEVE AND, IMPORTANTLY, TO 'ENJOY' PROGRESSING.... WHEN YOU FIND THE RIGHT WAY/PROGRAMME/ETC FOR YOU, YOU WILL KNOW, AS YOU WILL ENJOY IT AND WILL NO LONGER BE FIGHTING AGAINST IT... YOU ARE RIGHT.... IF YOU ARE NOT ENJOYING WHAT YOU ARE WORKING TOWARDS THEN DO SOMETHGING ABOUT IT.
It's getting in the way of everything and I think I need a huge break to decide what I want and if this is the right choice but I fear that if I drop out now, that's it and I'll never have another chance like this ever again. I'm so isolated when I'm at university, I don't even speak to my flat mates. It's the worst feeling. It feels like I'm so alone when I'm at university and it gets harder and harder to be there every day.
THERE ARE ALWAYS OPPORTUNITIES, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU BECOME ALIGNED WITH WHAT YOU TRULY WANT AND NEED TO BE DOING IN YOUR LIFE.
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS FOR US TO BE HAPPY.
YOUR LIFE, AT THE MOMENT, IS WHAT YOU HAVE CHOSEN SO FAR.... IF YOU ARE DESPERATELY UNHAPPY THEN YOU MUST DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.... GIVE YOURSELF QUITE TIME TO GET SOME GOOD ANSWERS ON HOW YOU CAN MOVE FORWARD IN A WAY THAT MAKES YOU HAPPIER.
GIVE YOURSELF FREEDOM TO EXPLORE MIND MAPPING, YOU MAY BE SURPRISED AT WHAT DIRECTION IT CAN LEAD TO.... ASK 'GOOD' QUESTIONS (AS YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED TO SEARCH FOR ANSWERS FOR YOU)... EG "WHAT CAN I DO TO MOVE ME FORWARD".... "HOW CAN I FIND THE COURSE I WANT", OR "WHO CAN I ASK FOR GOOD ADVICE"...... GIVE YOURSELF QUIET TIME/SPACE TO FIND OUT GOOD ANSWERS (DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS LIKE "WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME" ETC.... AS YOUR BRAIN WILL ALSO GIVE YOU LOTS OF NEGATIVE ANSWERS.... REMEMBER... ASK GOOD QUESTIONS AND YOU WILL RECEIVE GOOD ANSWERS.
GOOD LUCK, AND FOR MORE HELP JUST TEXT ME
