Do I need a conclusion for a personal statement. Watch

username2619537
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Seriously, I don't see the point. I have to choose between a generic conclusion or no conclusion at all, which should I pick?
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Good bloke
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(Original post by bledzcool)
Seriously, I don't see the point. I have to choose between a generic conclusion or no conclusion at all, which should I pick?
The point is to sum up your statement to leave the reader with your most important message clear and emphasised in his or her mind, and your challenge is to achieve that without repeating anything you have already written.
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username2619537
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(Original post by Good bloke)
The point is to sum up your statement to leave the reader with your most important message clear and emphasised in his or her mind, and your challenge is to achieve that without repeating anything you have already written.
ok done, also does this make sense. ' I am properly motivated'. Is that grammatically correct.
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eliza154
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Yeah, a conclusion is nice to tie everything together and so that your personal statement finishes by coming back to your subject (after you've gone on about all the irrelevant stuff you do outside of school to show you're well rounded).

But it's not the most important bit of the statement at all - it's not going to show the admissions team you are fit to study your subject at their university, the main body is much more important. My teacher told me to cut mine out because I didn't have any characters left - if you are pretty much on the statement's final draft and you just can't fit a conclusion in without compromising on the other paragraphs, your achievements/relevant work experience/wider reading etc absolutely take priority.

(well that's what my teachers told me lol, if in doubt ask your own teachers for advice)

Good luck with your application!
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username2619537
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(Original post by eliza154)
Yeah, a conclusion is nice to tie everything together and so that your personal statement finishes by coming back to your subject (after you've gone on about all the irrelevant stuff you do outside of school to show you're well rounded).

But it's not the most important bit of the statement at all - it's not going to show the admissions team you are fit to study your subject at their university, the main body is much more important. My teacher told me to cut mine out because I didn't have any characters left - if you are pretty much on the statement's final draft and you just can't fit a conclusion in without compromising on the other paragraphs, your achievements/relevant work experience/wider reading etc absolutely take priority.

(well that's what my teachers told me lol, if in doubt ask your own teachers for advice)

Good luck with your application!
yeah, I incorporated the conclusion into my internship paragraph quite nicely I think. Also does this make sense, ' I am properly motivated'.?
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Good bloke
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(Original post by bledzcool)
ok done, also does this make sense. ' I am properly motivated'. Is that grammatically correct.
What do you mean by 'properly', is the question that comes to mind.

You should not be making bald claims about any attributes you think you have. Anyone can do that and it doesn't convince. You should, instead, describe what you have done and achieved that demonstrate the attribute you wish to convey.
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eliza154
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(Original post by bledzcool)
yeah, I incorporated the conclusion into my internship paragraph quite nicely I think. Also does this make sense, ' I am properly motivated'.?
I don't think so, I'd probably phrase it like 'I am highly motivated'
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username2619537
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(Original post by Good bloke)
What do you mean by 'properly', is the question that comes to mind.

You should not be making bald claims about any attributes you think you have. Anyone can do that and it doesn't convince. You should, instead, describe what you have done and achieved that demonstrate the attribute you wish to convey.
yes... this is why I incorporated it into my internship para, I concluded it by saying something along the lines of' thus, I want to discover in greater detail how blah blah is used in the finance sector, so I am properly motivated to excel at your university with flying colours. The internship shows how motivated I am to study it further at university.
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She-Ra
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(Original post by bledzcool)
Seriously, I don't see the point. I have to choose between a generic conclusion or no conclusion at all, which should I pick?
Moved to PS advice.
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