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English Language Paper 2 Q.5

Hello, I'm in year 9 and for my end of year exam I'm taking Q.5 and I want to see where my level is so I wrote an answer for this question, and can you please check if it is approporiate for the audience when marking and if it matches the purpouse.

Please mark me and give me a grade out of
/24 for content and organization.
/16 for technical accuracy.

For an example they put a statement like
"Pets are either treated too well or too cruelly!"

Write the text for an article to be published on you school's website in which you explain your own point of view.

(Title): Pets are either treated well or too cruelly!

Do you think pets are treated too well or cruelly?
Firstly, from my perspective, I think that animals are treated well as people genereally adore and like animals thus they are typically treated well, as there are a multitude of case studies to reinfroce my ideas: It states one third and 75%, of animals,in the UK, are treated fairly. Animals are fun, playful and enjoyable; however, they can sometimes be vicious, fierce and energetic. As I imagine the disdainful cries for pet lovers, when animals get treated cruelly, as they will cry like boisterous cries of babies! Why would such harmless souls be treated poorly?

Furthermore, Do I think animals are treated well? I, however, think they are treated cruelly, my answer would, unequivocally, be no; I think animlas are morally obliged to do what they want to do therefore would wouldn't it violate their animal rights so why controll them and treat them cruelly? Additionaly, It states that 25% of animals, in Russia, are treated badly and therefore as a result leads to health implications. Can't they roam free? It would be preposterous to treat such harmless souls cruelly?
Don't you think people who treat pets badly should be mortified in what they do? I feel bad for them they must be in distraught and in despair.

In addition, I think animals are treated cruelly and visualize this: a benelovent dog with a tyrannical owner and the owner treats the dog with brutality, must be sad. It it said that animals are treated cruelly solely for scientific experiments. What are peoples incentives?