mental health help & my sarcastic voice... :(((
hi...thanks in advance for taking your time to read this.
I've been struggling with my mental health for over a good 10 years now - since I was 6 I was called fat by my relatives in Asia and it has impacted me up to this day. I remember coming home and always asking my family if they thought I was fat in which they said no, but one day my brother got so fed up that he just said "yes you are so fat" to shut me up. Then from that day onwards he's been calling me fat even until now when I'm almost 18...then it gradually moved onto being called stupid and useless. This thought has been in my mind for so long that I can't get it out and I DO believe it. It's not that I THINK I'm fat and stupid, it's that I KNOW I am. Now A levels are coming up in the summer and with my mock exams happening, I feel more stupid and like a failure than ever. I don't think I can do this anymore - I am actually going to fail. 😭 And waking up every morning, looking in the mirror to see an ugly, round face and to see how fat I am makes me so anxious to go to school. I'm going to university this September and I really want to solve this - not to treat my symptoms but to actually deal with the cause 😭 which basically means I need to lose fat but I have tried so many things since I was 13 and I have not lost any fat at all...I've built muscle, but no fat has been lost. What's worse is I'm very short too so I look even fatter than I already am. I study psychology, chemistry and biology and I am just so screwed. Predicted AAA but don't think I can even get that because I'm just a failure. This person in my chemistry class makes me feel even more **** than I already do about myself - always comparing, competing with grades and putting me down. I have tried counselling at my school but it hasn't helped me much at all. *sigh*
also another thing I want to ask is - how can I come across as less sarcastic?? I've never really realised this but since I was in year 10, I was told that when I talk I sound very sarcastic...when I'm not?? I'm actually being sincere 😭 and then when I moved school I got told the same thing so surely there is something wrong with me?? I don't know what it is...I was thinking maybe it's because I am always so tired so I speak in a monotone voice since I have no energy to talk? ahhh any advice for this? thanks again! xxx
I've been struggling with my mental health for over a good 10 years now - since I was 6 I was called fat by my relatives in Asia and it has impacted me up to this day. I remember coming home and always asking my family if they thought I was fat in which they said no, but one day my brother got so fed up that he just said "yes you are so fat" to shut me up. Then from that day onwards he's been calling me fat even until now when I'm almost 18...then it gradually moved onto being called stupid and useless. This thought has been in my mind for so long that I can't get it out and I DO believe it. It's not that I THINK I'm fat and stupid, it's that I KNOW I am. Now A levels are coming up in the summer and with my mock exams happening, I feel more stupid and like a failure than ever. I don't think I can do this anymore - I am actually going to fail. 😭 And waking up every morning, looking in the mirror to see an ugly, round face and to see how fat I am makes me so anxious to go to school. I'm going to university this September and I really want to solve this - not to treat my symptoms but to actually deal with the cause 😭 which basically means I need to lose fat but I have tried so many things since I was 13 and I have not lost any fat at all...I've built muscle, but no fat has been lost. What's worse is I'm very short too so I look even fatter than I already am. I study psychology, chemistry and biology and I am just so screwed. Predicted AAA but don't think I can even get that because I'm just a failure. This person in my chemistry class makes me feel even more **** than I already do about myself - always comparing, competing with grades and putting me down. I have tried counselling at my school but it hasn't helped me much at all. *sigh*
also another thing I want to ask is - how can I come across as less sarcastic?? I've never really realised this but since I was in year 10, I was told that when I talk I sound very sarcastic...when I'm not?? I'm actually being sincere 😭 and then when I moved school I got told the same thing so surely there is something wrong with me?? I don't know what it is...I was thinking maybe it's because I am always so tired so I speak in a monotone voice since I have no energy to talk? ahhh any advice for this? thanks again! xxx
Original post by Anonymous
hi...thanks in advance for taking your time to read this.
I've been struggling with my mental health for over a good 10 years now - since I was 6 I was called fat by my relatives in Asia and it has impacted me up to this day. I remember coming home and always asking my family if they thought I was fat in which they said no, but one day my brother got so fed up that he just said "yes you are so fat" to shut me up. Then from that day onwards he's been calling me fat even until now when I'm almost 18...then it gradually moved onto being called stupid and useless. This thought has been in my mind for so long that I can't get it out and I DO believe it. It's not that I THINK I'm fat and stupid, it's that I KNOW I am. Now A levels are coming up in the summer and with my mock exams happening, I feel more stupid and like a failure than ever. I don't think I can do this anymore - I am actually going to fail. 😭 And waking up every morning, looking in the mirror to see an ugly, round face and to see how fat I am makes me so anxious to go to school. I'm going to university this September and I really want to solve this - not to treat my symptoms but to actually deal with the cause 😭 which basically means I need to lose fat but I have tried so many things since I was 13 and I have not lost any fat at all...I've built muscle, but no fat has been lost. What's worse is I'm very short too so I look even fatter than I already am. I study psychology, chemistry and biology and I am just so screwed. Predicted AAA but don't think I can even get that because I'm just a failure. This person in my chemistry class makes me feel even more **** than I already do about myself - always comparing, competing with grades and putting me down. I have tried counselling at my school but it hasn't helped me much at all. *sigh*
also another thing I want to ask is - how can I come across as less sarcastic?? I've never really realised this but since I was in year 10, I was told that when I talk I sound very sarcastic...when I'm not?? I'm actually being sincere 😭 and then when I moved school I got told the same thing so surely there is something wrong with me?? I don't know what it is...I was thinking maybe it's because I am always so tired so I speak in a monotone voice since I have no energy to talk? ahhh any advice for this? thanks again! xxx
I've been struggling with my mental health for over a good 10 years now - since I was 6 I was called fat by my relatives in Asia and it has impacted me up to this day. I remember coming home and always asking my family if they thought I was fat in which they said no, but one day my brother got so fed up that he just said "yes you are so fat" to shut me up. Then from that day onwards he's been calling me fat even until now when I'm almost 18...then it gradually moved onto being called stupid and useless. This thought has been in my mind for so long that I can't get it out and I DO believe it. It's not that I THINK I'm fat and stupid, it's that I KNOW I am. Now A levels are coming up in the summer and with my mock exams happening, I feel more stupid and like a failure than ever. I don't think I can do this anymore - I am actually going to fail. 😭 And waking up every morning, looking in the mirror to see an ugly, round face and to see how fat I am makes me so anxious to go to school. I'm going to university this September and I really want to solve this - not to treat my symptoms but to actually deal with the cause 😭 which basically means I need to lose fat but I have tried so many things since I was 13 and I have not lost any fat at all...I've built muscle, but no fat has been lost. What's worse is I'm very short too so I look even fatter than I already am. I study psychology, chemistry and biology and I am just so screwed. Predicted AAA but don't think I can even get that because I'm just a failure. This person in my chemistry class makes me feel even more **** than I already do about myself - always comparing, competing with grades and putting me down. I have tried counselling at my school but it hasn't helped me much at all. *sigh*
also another thing I want to ask is - how can I come across as less sarcastic?? I've never really realised this but since I was in year 10, I was told that when I talk I sound very sarcastic...when I'm not?? I'm actually being sincere 😭 and then when I moved school I got told the same thing so surely there is something wrong with me?? I don't know what it is...I was thinking maybe it's because I am always so tired so I speak in a monotone voice since I have no energy to talk? ahhh any advice for this? thanks again! xxx
Stop caring what people think about you. You should only care what you think about you. If if you think there is something wrong with you, work to change it.
