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I feel like everyone undermines me academically

I am really passionate about my education and I’ve planned my entire academic life out, but part of me feels too dumb or not good enough. I’m currently in year 12, and I am currently achieving AAB in my A levels of English Literature, History, and Politics. However my schools docked me at BBC a grade under what I’m achieving for each. So much so that my personal development tutor allowed me to send him applications to summer schools so that he can do them. However, I feel he doesn’t understand that I literally get A’s in my exams. So much so that out of all 4 summer schools; I’ve been rejected from each. Durham, Bristol (Sutton trust, I got accepted to the online), and York (YESS - which my rejection came very recently, and hurt the most as I much love the modules for the international relations degree). Worst part is I’ve applied with my friends and I’ve seen them get accepted and me rejected each time. I’m not going to lie I’ve cried. So much. I keep comparing myself to them and I can’t understand why I’ve not been accepted. My GCSEs were 8s, 7s and 6s. I’m not doing anything this summer, York got back to me to do MOOCS but I just can’t afford it. I’m from a low income area on the outskirts of Newcastle, but my parents are merely over the free school meal limit at college so I never tick the box saying I’m claiming anything. Every summer school deadline is over and I’m not going to lie I feel like such a waste. My friends have been accepted to each one and me none of the three, none! It’s to the point where I got my rejection and I was in tears while my driving instructor was coming to pick me up, she was I was red-faced and asked to reschedule! It’s taking up my entire life, it feels like. I feel like such a disappointment to myself
Hey, I'm so sorry that you feel this way, I know
it's horrible getting rejections and also having your academics downplayed by the school but life's unfair.
Many schools only care about reputation; they predict students lower grades knowing the student will leave the school having achieved higher which then reflects amazingly on them and ranks them up in the league tables. It's sad but it's the truth so don't work yourself up about it. Just make sure you have the grades you need in time for ucas applications.

You should definitely talk to someone about how you feel as it seems you're bottling your emotions up a bit. Tell your friends that you're happy for them but as it's a touchy subject you'd rather they don't tell you about their summer school experiences much (if at all).

I also studied history and politics at A level and am studying International Politics at uni so if you want tips or any other advice PM me, I'd love to help!
Hi there, I completely understand how frustrated you must be feeling. If it helps, most MOOCs are free (especially the York ones) and all you need to do is screenshot and save the screen to prove you've completed it (if asked, but most unis don't, just put it in the education section of your UCAS.
Honestly, YESS's place distribution doesn't seem to be academic-prioristised but prioritised for students who are low-income/in social care/low progression to uni areas. I'm fairly certain this is true of most of these summer schools, so don't beat yourself up about getting rejected, it's not your fault :smile:

It's so understandable how all the rejections and the undervaluing makes you so upset, I'm so sorry that you're feeling like this and I wish you luck in it getting better <3

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