I feel very depressed and Lonely?

Iamok1999

I feel very lonely inside and heartbroken, Everyone hates me. I try my best in everything I know no one is prefect. God made me and I know my IQ is very low, I have lots of wishes to achieve in my life before I die. I have worked in the past and lost my Job due to the Employers saying I am slow and don’t do things which I get asked ( Which is not true, I think my ex colleagues do that purpose). I suffer from anxiety and pain attacks, I don’t talk a lot because people always end up hurting me no matter what. I am a person who speaks very less and likes to keep herself after going through abuse in my 24 years. To relieve pain , I cry to myself because I have no one besides God (Btw I a Muslim) . No one ever hugged me said they love me , I always been de motivated by people. Sometimes I wish I could go live in the jungle and never seen anyone at least no one would break my heart. Life is full struggles and pain😢

Reply 1

I7V

Original post by Iamok1999

Firstly, may Allāh bless you, know that the main goal is not to achieve in this life but rather to enter into Jannah and be saved from the Hellfire. In this life we are certainly going to face struggles and pain but we must remember that these are tests from Allāh so we must be patient and hold onto our religion, otherwise we would have failed these tests. Allāh said (meaning): {Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while such [trial] has not yet come to you as came to those who passed on before you? They were touched by poverty and hardship and were shaken until [even their] Messenger and those who believed with him said, “When is the help of Allāh?” Unquestionably, the help of Allāh is near.} [Baqarah 2:214]

{Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: ‘We believe,’ and will not be tested. But We have certainly tested those before them, and Allāh will surely make evident those who are truthful, and He will surely make evident the liars.} [al-‘Ankaboot 29:2-3]

{And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Saabiroon (the patient). Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: ‘Truly, to Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return.’ They are those on whom are the Salawaat (i.e. who are blessed and will be forgiven) from their Rabb (Lord), and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided ones} [al-Baqarah 2:155-157]

Know, many Allāh reward you, that trials will increase your rank with Allāh and will expiate your sins. The Prophet ﷺ said (meaning): “Nothing afflicts a Muslim of hardship, nor illness, nor anxiety, nor sorrow, nor harm, nor distress, nor even the pricking of a thorn, but that Allah will expiate his sins by it.” [Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 5641, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2573]The Prophet ﷺ said (meaning):“The people who lived in prosperity will wish on the Day of Resurrection to have the reward of those who were put to trial, even if their skin had been torn away with shears.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2402 - Hasan (fair) according to Al-Albani]

I also remind you of the āyah (meaning): {And (remember) when your Rabb (Lord) proclaimed: "If you are grateful, I will give you more (of My Blessings); but if you are thankless (i.e. disbelievers), verily My punishment is indeed severe."} [Ibrāhīm 14:7] So look at what Allāh has blessed you with and show your gratitude for it by perfecting and increasing in your acts of worship to Allāh. I am sure you know what is happening around the world to the Muslims and that they are facing much greater hardships than any of us. Their families have been massacred, their homes have been destroyed, children are orphaned and cannot even afford food to feed themselves. They are grateful for even a slice of bread or a pair of shoes. By knowing that, we are in no position to be saddened by our situation. the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said (meaning): “Look at those below you and do not look at those above you, lest you belittle the favours of Allah.” [Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2963]

As for your loneliness, then I can tell you for the last 2 years almost, I have not had a single friend. However, I feel as though this has been the least lonely I have ever felt, due to the fact that I have tried to get closer to Allāh rather than people. Therefore, I would advise you to start studying your religion as this is what will bring you success.
(These are referring to Islamic knowledge):
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said (meaning): "Whoever travels a path in search of knowledge, Allah will make easy for him a path to Paradise. People do not gather in the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah and studying it together, but that tranquillity will descend upon them, mercy will cover them, angels will surround them, and Allah will mention them to those near Him" [Sahīh Muslim 2699].
Allāh said (meaning): {It is only those who have knowledge among His servants that fear Allah.} [Fātir 35:28]
Allāh said (meaning): {Allâh will exalt in degrees those of you who believe, and those who have been granted knowledge.} [al-Mujādilah 58:11]
Abu Darda reported: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said (meaning):“Whoever travels a path in search of knowledge, Allah will make him traverse a path to Paradise. Verily, the angels lower their wings in pleasure for the seeker of knowledge. The inhabitants of the heavens and earth, even the fish in the depths of the water, seek forgiveness for the scholar. The virtue of the scholar over the worshipper is like the superiority of the moon over the stars. Verily, the scholars are the inheritors of the Prophets. The Prophets do not leave behind gold or silver coins, but rather they only leave behind knowledge. Whoever takes it has taken hold of an abundant fortune.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2682 - Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani]

It is upon us to learn the religion by studying it under reliable scholars who have dedicated their lives into doing this so that they can explain it to us. If we don't speak Arabic then we can learn from the students of these scholars who have taken what they have learnt from them and convey it to us in English. You can find one such YouTube channel called "Garden of Ilm" and I recommend you begin with the playlist "Important Lessons" which contains the most essential knowledge that every Muslim must know (although, sadly, most don't know) such as the details of the 5 pillars of Islām, the 6 pillars of Īmān and more. From there you can progress and study more books on the channel. I hope that his has benefitted you. If you have anymore questions, I will be more than happy to help - in shā' Allāh.