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    Empty. So done.
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    (Original post by CescaD96)
    Empty. So done.
    :hugs: What's going on?

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    Wish I could help everyone.
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    :hugs: What's going on?

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    Wish I could help everyone.
    My sister is badly ill and I couldn't care less. I'm literally panicking now about the future but at the same time feel lifeless and empty and non existent.

    You're helping enough by being here.
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    Bleh, exam in 2.5 hours and still haven't got through everything since brain decided that I really needed to feel bad last night. Had 2 hours sleep and the stuff to do the work open on my laptop since midday yesterday and didn't manage to touch it until an hour ago. Just feel horribly anxious like I did before exams started last week. I'm a bit hungry but at the same time I'm so anxious that I feel like I might throw up. I can never decide if that response is just a case of far too much adrenaline stopping the stomach from digesting so anything in there feels like it's going to come up or some kind of psychological conditioning that since being ill normally means being able to avoid doing something when you're young. Body might just be trying to pretend to be ill to get out of going to school not realising that I could have a migraine be coughing up blood and have lost a limb and I'd still have to go and do well.
    On a more positive note, in 4.5 hours I will have finished 2nd year and will never have to go through this hell ever again.

    Spoilered for me ranting about the university.
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    Am thinking of writing an article for one of the student newspapers just saying how there's a difference between pushing students to do there best and pushing them to a breakdown. Mostly because it's really annoying that people just put it down to pressure to do well and that's what you get for going to Cambridge and so on which is ridiculous. Going to any university shouldn't mean subjecting yourself to so much pressure you end up with mental health problems.
    All the stuff about how it will be worth it at the end too, it's stupid, how is better career prospects worth suffering and a quite frankly dangerous environment? This is getting me angry at the minute, in part because I am really sick of how much of the welfare seems to be making sure people can get help when they need to rather than, I don't know, not causing them problems in the first place? In what universe is it acceptable to cause people to have breakdowns as long as you have a counselling service and provisions so they can have extra time in exams after you do?

    And people talk about the pressure like it's some external force that can't be controlled and isn't a horrible institutional problem that comes from alumni coming back as fellow's and inflicting the same workload that they suffered through without a second thought because after all they managed it. Telling students that there's no reason they shouldn't get firsts and that needs to be there priority and then looking surprised when I say it's not mine and it shouldn't be anyone else's either. Yeah it'd be nice - for the college since then they can get more funding - but the priority has to be your own mental health in this place because no one else is watching it.

    Okay rant over. Back to learning for this exam.
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    Exam in two hours nervous already GCSE English


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    (Original post by Twenty15girl)
    Exam in two hours nervous already GCSE English


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    I have faith in you, you'll do great! Language? What board?
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    (Original post by Valvopus)
    Bleh, exam in 2.5 hours and still haven't got through everything since brain decided that I really needed to feel bad last night. Had 2 hours sleep and the stuff to do the work open on my laptop since midday yesterday and didn't manage to touch it until an hour ago. Just feel horribly anxious like I did before exams started last week. I'm a bit hungry but at the same time I'm so anxious that I feel like I might throw up. I can never decide if that response is just a case of far too much adrenaline stopping the stomach from digesting so anything in there feels like it's going to come up or some kind of psychological conditioning that since being ill normally means being able to avoid doing something when you're young. Body might just be trying to pretend to be ill to get out of going to school not realising that I could have a migraine be coughing up blood and have lost a limb and I'd still have to go and do well.
    On a more positive note, in 4.5 hours I will have finished 2nd year and will never have to go through this hell ever again.

    Spoilered for me ranting about the university.
    Spoiler:
    Show
    Am thinking of writing an article for one of the student newspapers just saying how there's a difference between pushing students to do there best and pushing them to a breakdown. Mostly because it's really annoying that people just put it down to pressure to do well and that's what you get for going to Cambridge and so on which is ridiculous. Going to any university shouldn't mean subjecting yourself to so much pressure you end up with mental health problems.
    All the stuff about how it will be worth it at the end too, it's stupid, how is better career prospects worth suffering and a quite frankly dangerous environment? This is getting me angry at the minute, in part because I am really sick of how much of the welfare seems to be making sure people can get help when they need to rather than, I don't know, not causing them problems in the first place? In what universe is it acceptable to cause people to have breakdowns as long as you have a counselling service and provisions so they can have extra time in exams after you do?

    And people talk about the pressure like it's some external force that can't be controlled and isn't a horrible institutional problem that comes from alumni coming back as fellow's and inflicting the same workload that they suffered through without a second thought because after all they managed it. Telling students that there's no reason they shouldn't get firsts and that needs to be there priority and then looking surprised when I say it's not mine and it shouldn't be anyone else's either. Yeah it'd be nice - for the college since then they can get more funding - but the priority has to be your own mental health in this place because no one else is watching it.
    Okay rant over. Back to learning for this exam.
    Breathe. You're going to do awesome. We all wish you good luck. In a few hours you'll be done 2nd year and have the whole summer to enjoy yourself. Don't cram, relax. And do eat something.
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    (Original post by CescaD96)
    Breathe. You're going to do awesome. We all wish you good luck. In a few hours you'll be done 2nd year and have the whole summer to enjoy yourself. Don't cram, relax. And do eat something.
    Cramming is basically my only way to revise. Had a bit of bread, it tasted funny but I think that's meds since everything tastes strange recently. Just need to get through ~practicals and I'll be done. Most of it is just remembering little details that are buried in the notes they give us.
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    (Original post by Valvopus)
    Cramming is basically my only way to revise. Had a bit of bread, it tasted funny but I think that's meds since everything tastes strange recently. Just need to get through ~practicals and I'll be done. Most of it is just remembering little details that are buried in the notes they give us.
    I cram a lot too but don't freak out like I tend to do! Good luck!
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    (Original post by CescaD96)
    I cram a lot too but don't freak out like I tend to do! Good luck!
    Yeah, surprisingly I haven't had any panic attacks at all for a while. Probably thanks to meds. Think I would actually prefer one or two to the underlying level of anxiety where I can't sleep or eat properly or concentrate and I feel guilty about doing anything that isn't revision. But then I don't care that much so I think maybe the apathy from the depression is taking the edge off? Would be nice if it could do that without the intrusive thoughts lack of concentration and motivation though.
    Thanks, a fair amount of it is multiple choice so as long as I can identify what one earth I'm looking at down the microscope I should be okay.
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    (Original post by Valvopus)
    Yeah, surprisingly I haven't had any panic attacks at all for a while. Probably thanks to meds. Think I would actually prefer one or two to the underlying level of anxiety where I can't sleep or eat properly or concentrate and I feel guilty about doing anything that isn't revision. But then I don't care that much so I think maybe the apathy from the depression is taking the edge off? Would be nice if it could do that without the intrusive thoughts lack of concentration and motivation though.
    Thanks, a fair amount of it is multiple choice so as long as I can identify what one earth I'm looking at down the microscope I should be okay.
    Good luck. :hugs:
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    I'm already overthinking the future. I have one exam left and then that's 7 years of my life done. :eek: I've probably done ****.


    I've not taken my Abilify for 3 days now. My sister is really ill and I couldn't give one flying crap, she can go rot in hell after yesterday.


    And what purpose do I have? I'm going into school today to give me something to do. I'm bored and tired of everything and I just give up. I give up.
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    Hello y'all
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    (Original post by keromedic)
    Hello y'all
    :hi:

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    Good luck everyone who has exams today!
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    :hi:
    How're you?

    My first exam is tomorrow.
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    (Original post by keromedic)
    How're you?

    My first exam is tomorrow.
    I'm alright, had a bit of a bad night. Doing better now though. How're you?

    Oh, good luck! What's it about? I finished last week, my final exam was on Saturday (I know, what genius thought that Saturday examsshould exist?). I hope you do well. :yep:
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    I'm alright, had a bit of a bad night. Doing better now though. How're you?

    Oh, good luck! What's it about? I finished last week, my final exam was on Saturday (I know, what genius thought that Saturday examsshould exist?). I hope you do well. :yep:
    Oh no. What happened? Did you have an attack of some sort? :/

    I've been cycling between hopeful, depressed, anxious and excited recently. I've even cried a few times as I imagine myself failing in August and I have periods of feeling demotivated and then psyched up.

    Oh dear, uni exam I take it! How did it go?

    Fp2. Complex numbers, differential equations, algebra stuff and polar graphs.
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    (Original post by keromedic)
    Oh no. What happened? Did you have an attack of some sort? :/

    I've been cycling between hopeful, depressed, anxious and excited recently. I've even cried a few times as I imagine myself failing in August and I have periods of feeling demotivated and then psyched up.

    Oh dear, uni exam I take it! How did it go?

    Fp2. Complex numbers, differential equations, algebra stuff and polar graphs.
    Just had a nightmare that woke me up, but I was having a panic attack as I woke up? I don't even understand how this is possible but apparently it is. So now I'm too scared to sleep. :facepalm:

    Ahh, A-Levels I take it? Yeah, they are super, super stressful. :sadnod: You're definitely not alone in that! I was the same at AS/A2, what're you studying? I find the best way of dealing with the pressure is to take time out to just chill (see friends, listen to music, watch your favourite shows, etc.) - but I totally get that it's hard to do that with all the pressure you're under to perform. :hugs: I highly doubt that you'll fail though. I think you're going to do well. :yep:

    Yeah! Not sure really. My MH has basically gone down the toilet so I'm worried I won't get a very good grade this year, and being that it is second year I need to get a good grade (this is why I wish first year counted, as I got a 70 last year, lol). Submitted extenuating circumstances, so hopefully they'll take it into account. Not much I can do now, just gotta wait til the end of the month then I'll get my grades. :eek:

    Ohh, maths. I've not done proper maths for ages. We only use stats. :lol: I hope it goes well. :hugs:
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    I'm in such a bad mood today. I want to go to school. I hate being stuck at home. I have so much I need to do but I can't do it at home.

    It all sucks. Gf thought she needed to go to the library and that was at least something but now she doesn't need to and I'm stuck inside all day again.
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    havign bad body memories dont know hwo to stop it and groudning isnt worrking. ****. **** this so frustating cant fdo it. :cry:
 
 
 
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