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    I’m so fed up with everything - fed up with university and the constant stress, fed up with the same routine, fed up with people and their appetite for non-stop bulls***, fed up with the current state of politics and society, and this constant rat race we all seem to live in.

    I don’t know whether I’m depressed or just blue. I don’t even read the news anymore, having turned off all the notifications on my phone, I’m so sick of the consistent negativity. I feel like I’m having a midlife crisis even though I’m young 😞
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    hang in there... life can suck sometimes
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    (Original post by truffle_999)
    I’m so fed up with everything - fed up with university and the constant stress, fed up with the same routine, fed up with people and their appetite for non-stop bulls***, fed up with the current state of politics and society, and this constant rat race we all seem to live in.

    I don’t know whether I’m depressed or just blue. I don’t even read the news anymore, having turned off all the notifications on my phone, I’m so sick of the consistent negativity. I feel like I’m having a midlife crisis even though I’m young 😞
    I'm sorry you feel that way. Do you have anything positive in your life that you focus on?
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    (Original post by cheesecakelove)
    I'm sorry you feel that way. Do you have anything positive in your life that you focus on?
    I’m not too sure tbh. I’ve ended up deleting any social medial accounts and apps associated I had, because I realised their just false, skewed perceptions of people’s lives and it just seemed to exacerbate my own depression and made me feel more s***** about my own life, which is by no means perfect. Far from it. I just feel so trapped, like I can’t progress further. 😥
    University is a fine example of this - I have no idea what I’m doing there, not one iota. To make matters worse, my attendance seems to be dropping as I barely attend (I’m in max 2 days a week miracously), and I’m not sure where my degree or whatever I graduate with, will take me.
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    Another victim of the school and college mentality of the past 20 years where Labour thought it was a good idea for "everyone" to go to uni. When schools and colleges only care about their "% of leavers go to uni" statistic, they put pressure on their students to apply, even if they don't know what they want to study. It's another effect of schools not teaching any lessons apart from those in which they pass exams at the end of it. Nothing taught about how to deal with life, especially as more and more parents don't bother to teach it either.
    Isn't it hard being somebody who doesn't want to go to uni? All that peer pressure and threats from teachers.
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    I'm feeling the same way as of late.
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    Another victim of the school and college mentality of the past 20 years where Labour thought it was a good idea for "everyone" to go to uni. When schools and colleges only care about their "% of leavers go to uni" statistic, they put pressure on their students to apply, even if they don't know what they want to study. It's another effect of schools not teaching any lessons apart from those in which they pass exams at the end of it. Nothing taught about how to deal with life, especially as more and more parents don't bother to teach it either.
    Isn't it hard being somebody who doesn't want to go to uni? All that peer pressure and threats from teachers.
    I didn’t state I didn’t want to go to university. Quite the contrary, I always wanted to pursue that path and I had a strong interest for what I am currently studying - it’s just my experience has been very lacklustre and isolating. And nowadays most graduates from all degrees are struggling to get good jobs, the market is very saturated and competitive. Sure, for people studying 'mickey-mouse' degrees, that will not get you anywhere but that isn't me.

    I’m left wing and I suppourt the Labour Party - so you can’t really blame them for wanting students to have ambitions and get decent jobs. That’s merely futile. Without a degree of some sort, it’s very difficult.
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    I really get where you're coming from. Life's a black hole, and sometimes it really sucks out all the good there ever was.

    People nowadays feel very unhonest and faker than precious generations, and whilst social media has some positive influence, there's been a lot of bad stuff too.

    When you see other people doing fantastic things out in the world and your sitting in your crummy apartment trying to get the bills done on time, it feels really unfair.

    Society's become cold and unforgiving, and people are just generally a lot crueller. Many of don't learn about this reality until we're out with a degree, but no job, and not a penny to spare.

    People do the ******** of "hey, look at the brighter side", but you do tend to question that. What brighter side? There is no brighter side in this situation.

    But the thing is, we need to accept this *****y thing exists. It'll always be looming over you. There's no way around it. But we need to learn to live with it. That's a lot easier said than done, you say. That's true, it is.

    How about that degree of yours. It may be no Mickey Mouse, but something made you choose it. What got you passionate about the subject? Try to rekindle that love again.

    And whilst your relationship with your Dad isn't great, what about your Mum? Surely she cares about you, and you care about her? Try talking to her. Maybe a conversation could really help the both of you.

    And I understand making new friends or even keeping in touch with old ones can be hard. You don't need to get into it straight away. Try with people you're most comfortable with, and if there's no one like that, try getting yourself to do something nice to get you in touch with people.

    What about some volunteering, something that involves working around children? It doesn't have to do anything with your degree, but I find being around children and helping them put together building blocks and reading them fairy tales is oddly soothing. They're very innocent and curious, and what you see is genuinely them is relieving to say the least- uncorrupted. It may not be your thing, but give it a shot. Sometimes, kids can really brighten your day.

    In terms of jobs, it depends on your reason for wanting it. Do you want it for the money, or do you want it because you love it? Think about that before you jump in. Look at your options. Even if it doesn't relate to your degree, just for having a degree alone, doesn't matter what it is, you can get a job somewhere better than pizza-delivery.

    Life is difficult mate, but there are some good people out there. Sometimes, they're hard to notice. They might be shy, or they'll be hiding their true selves behind a facade. But I kid you not, these people, should you find them, will make your world a better place, even if it is by an inkling.

    If your finding it difficult to deal with all your thoughts and emotions, talk to someone. There are hotlines for this kind of thing. And if it's really getting out of hand, talk to your GP. Getting in touch with someone who's got insight to such things can really help out, and they can help you with advice, meds and a lot of other things. Counselling and therapy may sound questionable, but they do help people. See if it can work for you.

    I hope you get your problems sorted out. All the best mate.
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    (Original post by truffle_999)
    I’m not too sure tbh. I’ve ended up deleting any social medial accounts and apps associated I had, because I realised their just false, skewed perceptions of people’s lives and it just seemed to exacerbate my own depression and made me feel more s***** about my own life, which is by no means perfect. Far from it. I just feel so trapped, like I can’t progress further. 😥
    University is a fine example of this - I have no idea what I’m doing there, not one iota. To make matters worse, my attendance seems to be dropping as I barely attend (I’m in max 2 days a week miracously), and I’m not sure where my degree or whatever I graduate with, will take me.

    And it’s not as if anyone can really get in touch with me, and relationships I have, have just detoriated, esp with my dad. I haven’t spoken to him in 6 years, and he’s making life a misery for mum. 🙁
    You are right in noticing social media for what it is. A lot of people feel miserable when they see how other people post on it. They seem to have a better life but don't realise that people only post the best things, not everything.

    In terms of how you feel at university, do you feel it is right for you? How do you feel about the course? It may be an idea to talk to your personal tutor if you have concerns about studying.

    When you started university, did you join any societies or clubs? It can be a good way to meet people and make friends. Go out and try new things. You won't like everything, but you can say you gave it a chance. Sometimes we have to act to create our own happiness, rather than staying still.

    I am sorry to hear about your relationship with your father. Are you still in contact with your mother?
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    (Original post by cheesecakelove)
    You are right in noticing social media for what it is. A lot of people feel miserable when they see how other people post on it. They seem to have a better life but don't realise that people only post the best things, not everything.

    In terms of how you feel at university, do you feel it is right for you? How do you feel about the course? It may be an idea to talk to your personal tutor if you have concerns about studying.

    When you started university, did you join any societies or clubs? It can be a good way to meet people and make friends. Go out and try new things. You won't like everything, but you can say you gave it a chance. Sometimes we have to act to create our own happiness, rather than staying still.

    I am sorry to hear about your relationship with your father. Are you still in contact with your mother?
    Yeah I am, but strained is how I would describe it.
    I don't really think I have an issue with university as such, and I wouldn't ever get them involved in my personal life anyway. Nor do I feel comfortable speaking to anyone there if anything did arise; my tutor's a right nob, and I don't really know many lecturers well enough to discuss things like this.
    I think I just need a good, long break!
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    (Original post by truffle_999)
    I’m so fed up with everything - fed up with university and the constant stress, fed up with the same routine, fed up with people and their appetite for non-stop bulls***, fed up with the current state of politics and society, and this constant rat race we all seem to live in.

    I don’t know whether I’m depressed or just blue. I don’t even read the news anymore, having turned off all the notifications on my phone, I’m so sick of the consistent negativity. I feel like I’m having a midlife crisis even though I’m young 😞
    Hey truffle I'm new here & I was just browsing when I found your post. Whatever you do don't beat yourself up about your situation. It sounds to me like you are just experiencing a reflective phase of your life and you're questioning lots of stuff. It's perfectly natural. It's a good thing to go through this now & then. We should question once in a while: What we are doing? Where we are going? The relationships we are in etc. Understand you are not alone and most people experience this stuff at least once in a lifetime. Try and see this as a +ve. Almost like lifting your head out of the sand & now you need to delve deeper to address your needs and to progress forward from this point. It's almost better to have these feelings now & take control of your life. It's good to question and recognising what we don't like helps us find what we do want as we go forward in life. There's nothing wrong with realising that certain stuff like social media isn't for you. May be for a phase of your life it served a purpose but now you've moved on. Some people need it others don't & there's nothing wrong with those choices. You clearly sound like you need more positivity in your life right now so maybe having a break from some of the -ve is a good idea. Instead try to devote a little more time to things you enjoy/find interesting.Meanwhile the real challenge for you is probably to home in & try to understand the real route cause of this general current negativity you're experiencing. In other words it's likely that there'll be 1 aspect that'll be the key issue. For example it might be the course you are on or your relationship with your Dad. It may well be both that feel key issues for you & that's fine but I suggest that you focus on 1 at a time initially. Then consider your options -maybe jot them down. Don't hold back and try not to restrict yourself by coming up with excuses. This is your life, your future and it's never too late to take control of it. Just don't rush into anything. Thoroughly explore each option. Eg If your current course of study is a key -ve issue for you right now try homing in on that and really examine the pros & cons of that course. Jot down +ve and -ve points side by side so you can easily refer to them. There may be questions that pop up that need addressing. So do your research & explore all avenues of where your final qualification could take you? Maybe the subject isn't important but the qualification itself offers opportunities in a range of businesses/services etc. Maybe it's a stepping stone to a line of work that you could train in that has nothing to do with the actual subject content you have been studying. Without you realising your final qualification could lead to a career choice that is completely different but may really appeal. The thing is it's best to do a bit of research and find out what's on offer out there. Your current studies may then have meaning and purpose as you realise their value to your future.You may discover as I did that you'd be better suited to a different course. Again you won't know until you delve deep & ask some searching questions of yourself. You may merely discover that it's worth completing your course for now just to keep more options open in the long run. In which case that in itself may be enough to motivate you to pick yourself up & complete the course you've started & get the qualification in the bag.You don't have to map out your whole future now. Few people know where things will lead but you do need to feel that what you are doing could have some value/benefit to your future. Hopefully you'll begin to recognise & feel a sense of relief that you can start to take control of what you doing & where you are heading which will help drive and motivate you. As a consequence you'll no doubt find that you start to feel happier. Btw once you get one key part of your life under control the rest tends to follow. If not then address each in turn as above. If it gets too stressful seek help and support. Don't just give up. You could be on the verge of a whole new phase of self discovery! Having someone you can trust and someone who can listen can be really helpful but not essential. My advise would be to approach student welfare of similar body. They know how to support students with these issues & it will remain private & confidential. Furthermore unlike parents they won't have any emotional attachments which can be very useful at times. Even if SW serve merely as a sound board it may give you some clarity or just a sense of relief to unburden.Good luck on your journey. I very much hope you are successful in re kindling your positive energy.😊
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I really get where you're coming from. Life's a black hole, and sometimes it really sucks out all the good there ever was.

    People nowadays feel very unhonest and faker than precious generations, and whilst social media has some positive influence, there's been a lot of bad stuff too.

    When you see other people doing fantastic things out in the world and your sitting in your crummy apartment trying to get the bills done on time, it feels really unfair.

    Society's become cold and unforgiving, and people are just generally a lot crueller. Many of don't learn about this reality until we're out with a degree, but no job, and not a penny to spare.

    People do the ******** of "hey, look at the brighter side", but you do tend to question that. What brighter side? There is no brighter side in this situation.

    But the thing is, we need to accept this *****y thing exists. It'll always be looming over you. There's no way around it. But we need to learn to live with it. That's a lot easier said than done, you say. That's true, it is.

    How about that degree of yours. It may be no Mickey Mouse, but something made you choose it. What got you passionate about the subject? Try to rekindle that love again.

    And whilst your relationship with your Dad isn't great, what about your Mum? Surely she cares about you, and you care about her? Try talking to her. Maybe a conversation could really help the both of you.

    And I understand making new friends or even keeping in touch with old ones can be hard. You don't need to get into it straight away. Try with people you're most comfortable with, and if there's no one like that, try getting yourself to do something nice to get you in touch with people.

    What about some volunteering, something that involves working around children? It doesn't have to do anything with your degree, but I find being around children and helping them put together building blocks and reading them fairy tales is oddly soothing. They're very innocent and curious, and what you see is genuinely them is relieving to say the least- uncorrupted. It may not be your thing, but give it a shot. Sometimes, kids can really brighten your day.

    In terms of jobs, it depends on your reason for wanting it. Do you want it for the money, or do you want it because you love it? Think about that before you jump in. Look at your options. Even if it doesn't relate to your degree, just for having a degree alone, doesn't matter what it is, you can get a job somewhere better than pizza-delivery.

    Life is difficult mate, but there are some good people out there. Sometimes, they're hard to notice. They might be shy, or they'll be hiding their true selves behind a facade. But I kid you not, these people, should you find them, will make your world a better place, even if it is by an inkling.

    If your finding it difficult to deal with all your thoughts and emotions, talk to someone. There are hotlines for this kind of thing. And if it's really getting out of hand, talk to your GP. Getting in touch with someone who's got insight to such things can really help out, and they can help you with advice, meds and a lot of other things. Counselling and therapy may sound questionable, but they do help people. See if it can work for you.

    I hope you get your problems sorted out. All the best mate.
    I completely agree - social media does have positive influences and can bring people together, buts it’s just a driving force to mental breakdown, but I guess it depends how much you use it. In reality, no ones life is how they present it, I’ve read between the lines. One of the main reasons for getting rid of my accounts, was the realisation of how superficial life has become.

    Job wise? I don’t know. I have no career in sight, it’s inevitable I’ll end for some crappy job somewhere. I’m so stressed, that job hunting and future thinking isn’t something I can contend with at the moment. 😣 I’ve learnt a lot from my current uni experience and am still learning, but I almost feel like I’ve been set up to fail. Like I’ve been royally stitched up. I know it depends on how I use my degree and what sector I want to work it, regardless of whether it is related or not, but I’m so lost. Passion and money are both equally important, and i need to do something I have an interest in but i don’t even know what that is.

    I would get in touch with old mates, but it’s funny. People only reach out to you, when it’s convienent for them, and don’t make time for you as your not a priority. There’s a lot of apathy in the world, and not enough empathy. And through the ups and downs of my life and tribulations, comes a dismantling of my personality and identitiy.

    And with regards to mum and dad, I don’t even know where to begin. I don’t have a ‘normal’ relationship with them. I don’t speak to dad, and my mum is so different to me personality and culture wise, I find it incredibly difficult to have a proper conversation. I can’t remember the last time my family all sat around the dinner table together, we just don’t do that. I'm an athiest, never really had a faith and even that is a cause for argument.

    I used to self harm when I was much younger, in my early to late teens, because I couldnt cope but I sought help from my GP at school at the time. But I can’t help feel, that that will make a reemergence in my life again, and I’m unsure as to the extent to which CBT will benefit me again. Short-term maybe - I’ve changed a lot since then! And I'm not a big fan of taking medication to alter my mood. My opinion on psychiatrists and pharmaceutical companies, is that there just 'drug-pushers' (not all of them). But thank you.

    How Richard Feynman (my favourite scientist + physicist) best describes it: ‘you have no responsibility to live up to what other people think you ought to accomplish. I have no responsibility to be like they expect me to be. It’s their mistake, not my failing’ - is exactly how I feel. 🤔
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    (Original post by anjolo)
    Hey truffle I'm new here & I was just browsing when I found your post. Whatever you do don't beat yourself up about your situation. It sounds to me like you are just experiencing a reflective phase of your life and you're questioning lots of stuff. It's perfectly natural. It's a good thing to go through this now & then. We should question once in a while: What we are doing? Where we are going? The relationships we are in etc. Understand you are not alone and most people experience this stuff at least once in a lifetime. Try and see this as a +ve. Almost like lifting your head out of the sand & now you need to delve deeper to address your needs and to progress forward from this point. It's almost better to have these feelings now & take control of your life. It's good to question and recognising what we don't like helps us find what we do want as we go forward in life. There's nothing wrong with realising that certain stuff like social media isn't for you. May be for a phase of your life it served a purpose but now you've moved on. Some people need it others don't & there's nothing wrong with those choices. You clearly sound like you need more positivity in your life right now so maybe having a break from some of the -ve is a good idea. Instead try to devote a little more time to things you enjoy/find interesting.Meanwhile the real challenge for you is probably to home in & try to understand the real route cause of this general current negativity you're experiencing. In other words it's likely that there'll be 1 aspect that'll be the key issue. For example it might be the course you are on or your relationship with your Dad. It may well be both that feel key issues for you & that's fine but I suggest that you focus on 1 at a time initially. Then consider your options -maybe jot them down. Don't hold back and try not to restrict yourself by coming up with excuses. This is your life, your future and it's never too late to take control of it. Just don't rush into anything. Thoroughly explore each option. Eg If your current course of study is a key -ve issue for you right now try homing in on that and really examine the pros & cons of that course. Jot down +ve and -ve points side by side so you can easily refer to them. There may be questions that pop up that need addressing. So do your research & explore all avenues of where your final qualification could take you? Maybe the subject isn't important but the qualification itself offers opportunities in a range of businesses/services etc. Maybe it's a stepping stone to a line of work that you could train in that has nothing to do with the actual subject content you have been studying. Without you realising your final qualification could lead to a career choice that is completely different but may really appeal. The thing is it's best to do a bit of research and find out what's on offer out there. Your current studies may then have meaning and purpose as you realise their value to your future.You may discover as I did that you'd be better suited to a different course. Again you won't know until you delve deep & ask some searching questions of yourself. You may merely discover that it's worth completing your course for now just to keep more options open in the long run. In which case that in itself may be enough to motivate you to pick yourself up & complete the course you've started & get the qualification in the bag.You don't have to map out your whole future now. Few people know where things will lead but you do need to feel that what you are doing could have some value/benefit to your future. Hopefully you'll begin to recognise & feel a sense of relief that you can start to take control of what you doing & where you are heading which will help drive and motivate you. As a consequence you'll no doubt find that you start to feel happier. Btw once you get one key part of your life under control the rest tends to follow. If not then address each in turn as above. If it gets too stressful seek help and support. Don't just give up. You could be on the verge of a whole new phase of self discovery! Having someone you can trust and someone who can listen can be really helpful but not essential. My advise would be to approach student welfare of similar body. They know how to support students with these issues & it will remain private & confidential. Furthermore unlike parents they won't have any emotional attachments which can be very useful at times. Even if SW serve merely as a sound board it may give you some clarity or just a sense of relief to unburden.Good luck on your journey. I very much hope you are successful in re kindling your positive energy.😊
    I think I am going through a reflective phase in my life, but I feel like I’ve been going through that the past 10 years. Through all the counselling/therapy, inpatient hospitalisations and endless anti-depressants I have been on, NOTHING HAS CHANGED. I once asked my psychiatrist why he entered the medical profession to become a psychiatrist – to which he smiled and replied, “There’s a lot of crazy people in the world and a lot of money to be made.” (He works in a NHS hospital where I have sessions with him, but he probably rakes it in on locum 😂)

    I’m slowly losing the will to live, day by day. I digress. I feel very much out of control of my life – sure there are positives and I have good days, but majority of the time I feel like absolute s**t. 😑

    I can’t quite pinpoint where all the negativity and problems in my life have stemmed from. It could be due to my previous school life, or current home and university situation; I would presume it’s all of them. I have done research, and am exploring possible career routes, whether it is related or not to my current line of study but as I suspected, my options are limited. I have probably done myself a disservice, somewhere along the way by not fully researching all avenues before finally settling for something, but I’ll take it as it comes.

    But I agree – I’ll complete my course to the best of my ability for the moment and see where that gets me, but I can’t see it taking me very far. I’m afraid, I seem to have lost all motivation and that will no doubt hinder my ability to perform and succeed. I try and not set outcomes as I absolutely despise goal orientation; it sets people up for failure – If you have achieved your goal, then what? How do you progress from there? I don’t know the real cost of this experience or the possible benefit to my life, until I graduate, get a job and enter the real working world. It all seems so easy on paper, but I know it’ll come apart at the seams sooner or later. ☹️

    I fear my days of feeling ‘happy’, have long gone. My life hasn’t gone according to plan, it’s derailed quite spectacularly. I don’t feel very equipped or skilful, and after my course I’m quite apprehensive as to how I can apply myself. With regards to seeking help, I’m not a naturally loquacious person and I tend to become uncomfortable when discussing my personal difficulties. But student welfare sounds like a possible avenue I could try, if I do completely lose my mind. Thanks.
 
 
 
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